#464: Tim Ferriss — My Healing Journey After Childhood Abuse
2 hr 20 min

For me, this is the most important podcast episode I’ve ever published.

In it, I describe the most life-shaping, certainly the most difficult, and certainly the most transformative journey of my 43 years on this planet. I’ve never shared it before.

My dance partner and safety net in this conversation is my friend Debbie Millman (@debbiemillman). She has been named one of the most creative people in business by Fast Company, and she is the host of Design Matters—a great show and one of the world’s longest running podcasts. She is also Chair of the Masters in Branding Program at the School of Visual Arts and Editorial Director of Print magazine, and she has worked on design strategy for some of the world’s largest brands.

But I didn’t ask Debbie to join me because of her bio. I asked Debbie because she’s a close confidante, she’s an excellent interviewer, and she’s been an incredible support for me in the last few years, including late-night emergency phone calls. She and I have also experienced similar trauma but have taken two *very* different paths to healing using *very* different tools. So, you get a two-for-one deal in this conversation. 

All resources mentioned in this episode, and many more, are listed at tim.blog/trauma.

And if you remember only one thing, please remember this: there is light on the other side. I wouldn’t have believed this even five years ago, but I now consider myself living proof that deep, lasting change is possible. Don’t give up. You are never alone, and it is never hopeless. I’m right there alongside you, as are millions of others.

Much love to you and yours, 

Tim

The Peter Attia Drive
The Peter Attia Drive
Peter Attia, MD
#139 - Kristin Neff, Ph.D.: The power of self-compassion
Kristin Neff is a Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas, author, and a leading expert on mindful self-compassion. In this episode, she shares how developing a self-compassion and mindfulness practice was the most effective tool for relieving her own suffering, and provides strategies and tactics to improve self-compassion and well-being. We discuss: * The life crisis that turned Kristin to mindfulness and self-compassion (3:30); * How mindful self-compassion relieved Kristin’s feelings of self-judgement, and the psychology that says we all have the capacity for self-compassion (9:45); * Peter’s history of self-criticism and his personal practice of self-compassion (17:15); * The problem with prioritizing self-esteem over self-compassion, and how self-compassion produces a more stable version of self-worth (20:15); * An argument for self-compassion over self-criticism for optimizing performance (26:15); * How and when to introduce self-compassion to children (31:45); * Learning her son had autism—a personal story of how Kristin used mindfulness and self-compassion (36:45); * Self-compassion for cases of childhood trauma, PTSD, and overcoming a “fear of compassion” (44:00); * The relationship between self-compassion and physical health (49:30); * Distinguishing between self-compassion and self-pity, and the three necessary components self-compassion (52:30); * Why self-criticism comes from a desire to be safe, the circular pattern of self-judgment, and self-compassion as the ultimate motivator (55:45); * Potential role of a self-compassion practice for addiction and other maladaptive behaviors (58:45); * Clinical applications and practical uses of self-compassion (1:01:30); * Why you don’t need to meditate to learn mindfulness and self-compassion (1:04:45); * Kristin’s personal meditation practice (1:08:40); * Resources for learning self-compassion (1:11:45); and * More. Learn more: https://peterattiamd.com/ Show notes page for this episode: https://peterattiamd.com/kristinneff Subscribe to receive exclusive subscriber-only content: https://peterattiamd.com/subscribe/ Sign up to receive Peter's email newsletter: https://peterattiamd.com/newsletter/ Connect with Peter on _Faceboo__k_ | _Twitter_ | _Instagram_.
1 hr 17 min
The Jordan Harbinger Show
The Jordan Harbinger Show
Jordan Harbinger
439: Going to North Korea: Part Two | Stereo Sunday
This is the third episode of Stereo Sunday, a little Stereo app-sponsored experiment we’ve been doing live in front of a studio audience of you! Download the Stereo app for iOS or Android here. Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/439 On This Week’s Stereo Sunday, We Continue Our Adventures in North Korea (Part One Can Be Found Here): * Gabe and Jordan traveled to North Korea (aka Democratic People's Republic of Korea -- or DPRK) together several times between 2011 and 2016. * As bizarre as you've heard North Korea can be, the reality is probably even weirder. * What do you actually do on a trip to North Korea? * How long does a typical itinerary last? * Should you strike up conversations with random people in transit (or let them tell you what you can and cannot read)? * What's so impressive about the Arirang Mass Games? * What should you do if you're accidentally caught up in propaganda production? * How do North Korean subways differ from what we've come to expect in the West? * How can throwing a frisbee thaw international iciness? * How much warm beer can you get for $20 cash money American? * Want to know what it's like to live out a scene from a David Lynch-directed musical? Just dine at a North Korean restaurant! * Will you get thrown into a gulag for performing the Star-Spangled Banner at karaoke in North Korea (or should you)? * Why did Kim Jong-il allegedly accompany his mother into battle as an infant? * In the US, we have freedom of speech. In the DPRK, you don't even have freedom from speech. * Why do so many Americans and Canadians own businesses in a town on the Chinese-North Korean border? * After talking about all the upsides of visiting North Korea as an American, what are the downsides? * If you visit North Korea, what will you encounter that you won't hear about on American network news? * We also answer some of our listener questions that came in live during the show! * Download the Stereo app here and participate with us live on Friday, November 20th and 27th, at 2 p.m. PST! * Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @JordanHarbinger and Instagram at @jordanharbinger. * Connect with Gabriel on Twitter at @GabeMizrahi. Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider leaving your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!
1 hr 13 min
The Art of Manliness
The Art of Manliness
The Art of Manliness
#664: The Masters of the Art of War
Looked at from the heat of combat, war can seem disorganized and chaotic. But overarching the conflict is typically some kind of thoughtful, well-ordered, even scientific strategy that is influencing when, where, how, and why dueling forces have met. My guest today will introduce us to a few of the military philosophers and tacticians who made the most significant contributions to the art of strategy over the last couple millenia. His name is Andrew Wilson, and he's a professor at the Naval War College, as well as the lecturer of the Great Courses course, Masters of War: History's Greatest Strategic Thinkers. We begin our conversation with a brief overview of what martial strategy is, why civilians should study it, and how the contrast between generals Eisenhower and Patton delineate the difference between strategy and operations. We then survey several of history's most influential war strategists, and the contexts in which their theories and doctrines were born. This tour includes a discussion of how Sun Tzu used The Art of War to argue that a new type of war in a new type of society required a new type of general who could process conflicts like a supercomputer, and a dive into how Carl von Clausewitz emphasized the importance of understanding how complexity, irrational passions, and creative genius underlay contemporary warfare. We end our conversation with how military strategy has or hasn’t changed in the 21st century. Get the show notes at aom.is/mastersofwar. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
50 min
ChooseFI
ChooseFI
The Unstuck Network
274 | Tax Planning 2020 | Sean Mullaney
* It's end-of-year tax planning time. As you get further along in your financial independence journey, there are likely more end-of-year tax planning items you'll need to be aware of. Having a checklist to review annually is useful. * It's been an unusual year and December is that time to begin making end-of-year tax considerations. In addition to the normal checklist, there may be additional items to consider in this remarkably different year. * Sean Mullaney says unique to 2020 are Roth conversions. While Roth conversions should be on the checklist every year, this year there was a much greater chance of diminished income which may provide the opportunity to make Roth conversions in a lower marginal income tax bracket. * In any year when income is much lower than it normally is, Roth conversions would be at the top of your mind. The deadline is December 31 and there are no extensions. * While complex situations may benefit from professional consultations, anyone with mostly W2 income can find their tax brackets online. If your income has dropped from 22-24% to 10-12%, locking in a Roth conversation at that lower rate is effective tax planning. * A Roth conversion is when you go into a traditional IRA account and convert it to a Roth IRA. This is a taxable event, but you are intentionally choosing it because you are in a lower tax bracket for the year rather than convert or withdraw funds in a letter year when your income is higher and the taxes will be higher. * How much money should be converted to a Roth IRA? Sean says he has never encountered a client who has had too much money in a Roth IRA. While the action is irrevocable, there is no penalty for converting too much. If a portion of the conversation is taxed at 22%, it is not the most efficient conversion, but your future self will likely still be quite happy that you did it. * Some employers allow for Roth conversions within their 401K plans. * The deadlines for completing some of these end-of-year tax planning checklist times vary. Solo 401Ks and qualified business income tax deductions should be completed as soon as possible. * In addition to Roth conversions, another item with a Dec 31 deadline is charitable contributions. * Checklist items with an April 15 deadline are traditional IRA, Roth IRA, and health savings account contributions. * A good rule of thumb is individual tax accounts have a tax return deadline, not an end-of-year deadline. * The reason solo 401Ks have an “as soon as possible” deadline is that unlike IRAs, solo 401Ks require more time and paperwork to do. It may not be necessary to have it funded by Dec 31, but you'll want it set up and have a well-documented game plan. S-corps do have to fund the employee-side by the end of the year. * The first item on Sean‘s checklist is charitable contributions. With that category are two options to consider, a donor-advised fund if you plan to itemize deductions this year, or regular year-end charitable contributions. * If you don't plan on itemizing, in 2020 up to $300 per tax return make be taken as a charitable contribution against your adjusted gross income. * Another checklist item to be completed by the year's end are small business expenses since they are deducted when paid for, not when accrued. Businesses who have had a good 2020 may want to accelerate these payments to get the deduction this year. While businesses that have struggled in 2020 may want to hold off making payments until 2021. * In response to a question from Brad regarding credit cards, Sean confirmed that credit cards work on a cash basis so the deduction takes place in the same in which the credit card was used, not when the credit card bill was paid. * Paying bills with a check becomes a little trickier as you may need to prove to the IRS that the check was written and mailed on a business day prior to Dec 31 even if the vendor does not deposit the check until January of the following year. * A backdoor Roth IRA applies when your income is too high to contribute to a regular Roth IRA. If you've done a backdoor Roth IRA in 2020, don't roll over any 401Ks, 403Bs, or 457s into tractional IRAs before Dec 31, wait until Jan 1 so it's not complicated by the pro-rata rule. * To clean your investments up before leveraging the backdoor Roth technique, try and roll traditional IRA accounts into a new employer's 401K plan. Then implement the backdoor Roth IRA which may be done by April 15. * Sean has a blog post describing the process to get clean with traditional IRAs before doing a backdoor Roth IRA. * Tax-gain and tax-loss harvesting are also both Dec 31 deadlines. The stocks need to be sold by the end of the year. With tax-loss harvesting, you may not repurchase those securities within 30 days before or after the sale to comply with the wash sale rule. * If you're in the 12% marginal federal income tax rate or lower, the capital gains rate today is 0%. You may want to sell stocks to diversify your portfolio or sell and rebuy the same stock to realize the large capital gain and reset your basis without paying federal income tax. Unlike tax-loss harvesting, there are no timing considerations to make when repurchasing the same stock with tax-gain harvesting. * State income taxes may not favor capital gains in the same way the federal tax does. * Keeping all of the rules and impacts of buying and selling straight can be confusing and time-consuming. It is helpful to keep your tax records as clean as possible by doing everything in a specific account for this purpose. Sean states that tax-loss harvesting should be a tactic and not a goal occurring only in years where you are down. * State tax considerations to be mindful of are fourth quarter estimated tax payments and deduction planning. In California for example, it may be beneficial to take the standard federal deduction and itemize to take advantage of the state property deduction, possibly even pre-paying on property taxes. * A FI framework allows you to play from a position of strength. The financial independence community can take advantage of timing their payments for certain things and make strategic decisions because they don't have the same issues with cashflow that people on a traditional path might have. * While many in the financial independence community may be too young to think about required minimum distributions (RMD), it's good information to review for future planning. * RMDs apply to all retirement accounts except Roth IRAs. Starting at age 72, minimum distributions will be required by Dec 31 or there is a penalty. However, in 2020, they have been canceled and you may want to convert it into a Roth. * When you inherit an IRA, it doesn't matter how old you are. You are subject to an RMD or a 10-year rule. It would be wise to consult a tax professional when inheriting a sizable IRA. * With an inherited Roth IRA, the account will have to be emptied within 10 years following the death of the original owner. Different rules may apply to eligible designated beneficiaries who may have RMDs instead. * An adult who inherits a traditional IRA has a tax issue and probably will need professional assistance wit * The year-end is a good time to update beneficiary designation forms. Financial institution accounts are governed by the beneficiary designation forms, not wills or trusts, so it's important to ensure these are up-t0-date. * Year-end tax planning is great, but Sean likes long-term strategic tax planning to minimize your total tax over your lifetime. January is a great time to start long-term planning. As always, the discussion is general and educational in nature and does not constitute tax, investment, legal, or financial advice with respect to any particular taxpayer. Please consult your own advisors regarding your own unique situation. Resources Mentioned In Today's Conversation * Register for The Simple Startup Winter…
54 min
No Bullsh!t Leadership
No Bullsh!t Leadership
Martin Moore
Managing Natural Tensions: The balance of value
Episode #117 // Every organisation inherently has a number of natural tensions between different groups and functions - finance vs marketing; sales vs operations; operations vs asset management; IT and… virtually everyone! Rather than trying to eliminate these tensions, leaders should concentrate on using them to get better outcomes. It’s through nurturing and managing natural tensions that you’ll find a balance - this will improve your decision-making, and ultimately create the greatest value for your organisation. There are no black-and-white answers to this question, but there are some practical principles and philosophies you can employ. In this episode, I provide some useful tips for managing natural tensions in order to improve the value outcomes of your team.  // We are on a mission to hit 1 million listens by the 31st December 2020. To help us to reach this goal, and impact even more leaders just like you who would benefit from the strategies and tools that Marty covers in the podcast, please share the podcast with your network. You can also subscribe, follow, rate and review the podcast, that will help more leaders find us when they’re searching for a new leadership podcast to binge on. If we hit our goal, we will be running a completely free live virtual leadership event in February 2021, and we would love for you to be there! Keep up with the live listener number and see how close we are to our goal at www.yourceomentor.com/stats     See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
18 min
Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu
Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu
Tom Bilyeu
6 Experts Share Important Lessons on Being Grateful | Impact Theory
Check out our sponsors! Panasonic HomeCHEF 4-in-1 Multi-Oven: To receive special offers, go to PanasonicKitchen.com and become a Panasonic Kitchen Insider. Blinkist: Go to https://blinkist.com/impact Try it FREE for 7 days and save 25% off your new subscription. NETGEAR: Learn more at netgear.com/wifi This Thanksgiving, open your mind and heart to appreciation, gratefulness, and thankfulness for others. On this episode of Impact Theory, Tom Bilyeu is joined by multiple experts with a focus on positivity, gratefulness, and appreciation including John Maxwell, Jewel, Ken Honda, Rainn Wilson, Chamillionaire, and Jocko Willink. They focus on and discuss the power of valuing others right from the start, how to add value to others’ lives, why you should be profoundly grateful, how to have a mindset of appreciation, the power of always giving back, how to be always looking for positivity, and why relationships are absolutely key to succeeding in life. SHOW NOTES: Value People | John Maxwell discusses the power of connecting to others. [1:22] Adding Value | John Maxwell shares why you should seek to add value for others. [2:03] Be Profoundly Grateful | Jewel reveals your ability to get addicted to positive things. [5:02] Gratitude | Jewel reveals how to leverage gratitude to eliminate anxiety. [8:07] Appreciate | Ken Honda shares how to shift your mindset towards appreciation. [9:58] Give It Back | Rainn Wilson shares the ultimate potential achieved when serving others. [16:20] Find The Positives | Chamillionaire discusses the power of focusing on what's possible. [18:35] Honor Your Relationships | Jocko Willink reveals how to build useful relationships. [22:30] QUOTES: “Giving value to people and expressing that to them is the common ground that builds relationships.” [2:01] “…the people with a radiance of appreciation often attract more people and more opportunities.” [12:02] “When I say that relationships are the most important thing in getting things done. When I look back at my career in the Navy in the Seal Teams, just about every single thing that I ever did was through relationships." [22:29] FOLLOW JOHN MAXWELL: Website: https://johnmaxwell.com Instagram: https://bit.ly/30SqXL1 Facebook: https://bit.ly/30SuBEW Twitter: https://bit.ly/2Gj6mWM FOLLOW JEWEL: Website: https://jeweljk.com Instagram: https://bit.ly/2RO3c3v Facebook: https://bit.ly/34IxAkY Twitter: https://bit.ly/34HAZkf FOLLOW KEN HONDA: Website: https://kenhonda.com Instagram: https://bit.ly/2N8Yfjd Facebook: https://bit.ly/3ecxDcY Twitter: https://bit.ly/30SWgr4 FOLLOW RAINN WILSON: Website: https://soulpancake.com/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/rainnwilson/ Facebook: https://facebook.com/rainnwilson/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/rainnwilson FOLLOW CHAMILLIONAIRE: Website: https://chamillionaire.com Instagram: https://bit.ly/2SCpR2f Facebook: https://bit.ly/2vt4mcA Twitter: https://bit.ly/2w33oUq FOLLOW JOCKO WILLINK: Website: https://jockopodcast.com Instagram: https://bit.ly/2sFPXIt Facebook: https://bit.ly/2Q0Eqvu Twitter: https://bit.ly/2Q2bL9d
31 min
How to Be Awesome at Your Job
How to Be Awesome at Your Job
Pete Mockaitis
622: Taking Control of Stress Before It Takes Control of You with Kirsty Bortoft
Kirsty Bortoft shares easy ways to keep stress and negativity at bay.  — YOU’LL LEARN —  1) How to un-hijack your brain in 12 seconds  2) How to effectively deal with stress in five steps  3) The number one reason why most people struggle with stress  Subscribe or visit AwesomeAtYourJob.com/ep622 for clickable versions of the links below.  — ABOUT KIRSTY —  Kirsty Bortoft is an award-winning mindset coach to entrepreneurs and professionals. She helps them to dissolve stress and anxiety without having to resort to medication and traditional therapy. Kirsty developed the unique ‘Freedom Alignment Method', a three-stage process that crushes the obstacles so many high achievers frequently face during their lifetime. Obstacles that inevitably leave them feeling trapped by their current circumstance and pulled from the inner peace and happiness they deserve, despite working so very hard for it. • Kirsty’s book: Break Free From Pain: How to Heal from Physical, Emotional and Mental Pain  • Kirsty’s program: The Freedom Alignment Method  • Kirsty’s website: KirstyBortoft  • Kirsty’s YouTube: Kirsty Bortoft – Mindset Coach  • Kirsty’s Facebook: Kirsty Bortoft  • Kirsty’s Twitter: @KirstyBortoft  — RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE SHOW —  • Book: The Upside of Stress: Why Stress Is Good for You, and How to Get Good at It by Kelly McGonigal  • Book: Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender by David Hawkins  • Book: The Biology of Belief 10th Anniversary Edition: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter & Miracles by Bruce Lipton  • Personality: Joe Dispenza  — THANK YOU SPONSORS! —  Klaviyo. Grow your ecommerce business faster at klaviyo.com/grow
41 min
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