How To Fail With Elizabeth Day
Elizabeth Day
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is a podcast that celebrates the things that haven’t gone right. Every week, a new interviewee explores what their failures taught them about how to succeed better.
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Oct 31, 2023
S18, Ep10 Claudia Winkleman on the joy of imperfection
I LOVE CLAUDIA WINKLEMAN.
There. That's it. That's your shownotes.
Well ok then... Claudia Winkleman is a broadcaster who feels like your best friend - whether she's co-hosting Strictly Come Dancing, fronting her Saturday morning BBC Radio 2 show or sending shivers down your spine as the presenter of The Traitors. And now, for our season finale, she joins me to talk about her hatred of perfect, her distaste for exercise, her introversion and her failure to live in the present. Plus: struggles with sleep, the invaluable lessons her parents' taught her and why Rembrandt (as seen with minus 15 eyesight) might be her forever style icon.
*Please note: this episode was recorded before the recent horrific events in Israel and Gaza*
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Claudia's new range of CBD beauty and wellness products with Cannaray is available to purchase here.
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You can book tickets for my March 2024 UK tour, An Audience With Elizabeth Day (lol), here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Claudia Winkleman @claudiawinkle
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Oct 25, 2023
S18 BONUS EPISODE: Georgia Harrison on taking back her power
TW: image-based sexual abuse
Georgia Harrison is a reality TV star turned activist - a woman who has used her own pain to change the law for other survivors of sexual assault.
In 2020, her former boyfriend, Stephen Bear, shared intimate video footage of her online - filmed on his own CCTV cameras - without her consent. He posted it onto his OnlyFans page, charging viewers for access. From there it went viral. Georgia fought for two years to bring the case to court. In March, Bear was jailed for 21 months, required to sign the sex offenders register and ordered to pay Harrison over £200,000 - the highest ever sum awarded in an image abuse case. Harrison went on to campaign successfully for a change in the law to help other victims.
In this very special bonus episode, Georgia joins me to talk about all of this, as well as her journey with ADHD (which was left undiagnosed for years) and her grief over what Bear stole from her - not just her privacy, but her agency to make her own decisions. Plus...wait for it...her failure to be a puppeteer (no, really).
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Georgia Harrison's book, Taking Back My Power, is out today and available to order here.
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If you've been affected by any of the issues discussed, you can get in touch with the Revenge Porn Helpline here.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Georgia Harrison @georgialouiseharrison
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Oct 24, 2023
S18, Ep9 Dr Maggie Aderin-Pocock: one of Britain's foremost space scientists on belonging and the meaning of life
CW: miscarriage
Maggie Aderin Pocock MBE is a space scientist, educator and broadcaster - and quite possibly the first How To Fail guest who has her own Barbie doll. Fascinated with space from an early age, she even built her own telescope as a teenager. Nowadays, she's the co-presenter of the long-running TV programme _The Sky at Night_, as well as being Chancellor of the University of Leicester and the first Black woman ever to win a gold medal in the Physics News Award.
Her achievements are all the more admirable when you consider her upbringing: the child of divorced parents who found herself at the centre of a difficult custody battle, she changed schools 13 times in 14 years and struggled with lessons because of undiagnosed dyslexia. From an early age, she found refuge in the night sky, viewed from the rooftop of her council flat.
She joins me to talk about her extraordinary life, as well as her failures in tidiness and punctuality - and what being a mother in her 40s has taught her. Plus: how difficult is it _really_ to build a telescope?
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The Art of Stargazing by Dr Maggie Aderin-Pocock, is published on 2nd Novemer and is available to order here.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
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Oct 19, 2023
S18, Ep8 Dawn French on fertility, friendship and being an anti-perfectionist
CW: suicide; infertility
I know, I know, we don't normally release episodes on a Friday but when you're offered DAWN FRENCH, you release an episode on whatever blimmin' day of the week you can (and preferably all seven of them).
I am so delighted to welcome the actor, comedian and bestselling author Dawn French to the podcast. She joins me to talk about being - in her words - 'a bit of a twat', anti-perfectionism, why so many comedians come from military families, how friendship doesn't mean you don't feel jealous and, of course, her lifelong professional and platonic partnership with Jennifer Sauders.
We also talk about the death of her father by suicide and what this taught Dawn about grief and survival. And she opens up movingly about years of infertility followed by the decision to adopt her daughter, Billie.
An amazing conversation with an amazing person. Thank you so much, Dawn.
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The Twat Files by Dawn French is out now and available to buy here.
Dawn French Is A Huge Twat (the live show) is touring the UK through the rest of the year. Book your tickets here.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Dawn French @dawnrfrench
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Oct 17, 2023
S18, Ep7 Gillian Anderson on sex, body image and rebellion
Continuing this season's line-up of ICONIC AND INCREDIBLE WOMEN, I am veritably trembling with delight to bring you today's guest: the extraordinary Gillian Anderson.
Her 30-plus year career has taken her from playing FBI Special Agent Scully in The X Files to Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher in The Crown. She’s been a dogged detective in The Fall and an unembarrassable sex therapist in the Netflix hit show Sex Education. On stage, she has been everything from Blanche duBois in A Streetcar Named Desire to Margo Channing in All About Eve. It’s almost easier to list the roles she hasn’t played than the ones she has.
Owing to the ongoing SAG-AFTRA actors strike, we don't talk about any of her acting roles. Instead, this liberates us to have a fascinating chat about life, fame, womanhood and everything in between. We talk about her failures to look after herself, her addiction to work, how she coped with global celebrity in her 20s and how this affected the way that she saw herself. Plus: why she thinks wellness culture is making us ill and why her natural instinct when someone tells her what to do is to say 'F** off.'
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Gillian's healthy soft-drink range, G-Spot, is available to buy here. (Not an ad but it tastes EXCELLENT).
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Gillian Anderson @gilliana
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Oct 12, 2023
S18 MIDSEASON BONUS! Captain Sandy from Below Deck on surviving addiction, pirates - and reality TV
CW: addiction
Look, most of you know I love reality TV. And some of you might know that I love Below Deck so much I snuck in a mention of it in my latest novel. So when I was offered the chance to meet the legend that is Captain Sandra Yawn, of Below Deck Med fame, I jumped at it. (Luckily, not overboard).
Even if you've never watched a single episode of Below Deck, Capt. Sandy's story is a riveting tale of resilience and courage. As a teenager, she struggled with alcoholism and almost ended up in jail. Instead, she started working on boats - and saved her own life in the process. She rose through the ranks of the maritime industry to become one of the only female superyacht captains in a field dominated by men.
She joins me to talk about this, as well as failing to realise her early potential, growing up gay but not feeling able to live her truth, surviving both cancer and an attack by pirates, as well as what she's learned about herself from reality TV. And yes, I ask some niche Below Deck questions because WHY WOULDN'T I?
(This chat was recorded before the new season started, btw, and obviously I'm slavishly watching each episode as soon as it drops).
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The new season of Below Deck Mediterranean is available to watch on Hayu.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Capt. Sandy @captainsandrayawn
Hayu @hayusocial
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Oct 10, 2023
S18, Ep6 Marina Abramovic: one of the greatest living artists on performance, passion and power
It is impossible to put into words how much I adored this conversation. Which, in a way, is apt because Marina Abramovic is one of our greatest living artists and renowned for expressing through her work, the thoughts, feelings and emotional impulses that lie beyond words.
Born in 1946 in post-war Yugoslavia, she painted from the age of 14 and spent the next 50 years pushing herself to extremes of physical and mental endurance in search of fundamental truths. Last month, her exhibition opened at the Royal Academy in London - the first solo show by a woman in the RA’s main galleries.
But if all this sounds quite serious, fear not - in person, Abramovic is a wonderful, engaging and light-hearted presence, full of wisdom and profound thoughts but also a lot of giggles. We talk about fear and belonging, love and heartbreak (and how to get over someone), introversion and performance, and she teaches me all about what Christopher Columbus can tell us about failure.
One of my favourite ever episodes - and that's saying something.
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Marina Abramovic at the Royal Academy runs until 1 January 2024. Book your tickets here. A full schedule of performances can be found here.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Marina Abramovic Institute @abramovicinstitute
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Oct 3, 2023
S18, Ep5 Geri Halliwell-Horner on writing, grief - and what the Spice Girls taught her
On this week's episode, I welcome the all-singing, all-writing, all-dancing POWERHOUSE that is Geri Halliwell-Horner. She started out as Ginger Spice, in the most iconic girl band of all time (simple facts), the Spice Girls, selling over 100 million records worldwide. After the birth of her first child in 2006, she started writing while a single mother and released a series of bestselling children’s books - the Ugenia Lavender novels. Now, she returns with the publication of the young adult novel Rosie Frost and the Falcon Queen, a mixture of fantasy and history carrying a message that we can all be our own heroes.
Geri joins me to talk about her love of writing (and why an early mentor was none other than William Boyd), not applying herself enough at school, why the Spice Girls belongs to everyone, how she dealt with grief after the death of her father and why it's morally important to her to 'age with grace and power.'
Geri is my second ever Spice Girl on the podcast (the first was the amazing Melanie Chisholm) and it is a podcast goal of mine to have them all on as guests. They were such an amazing and empowering part of my teenage life. Three more to go. CAN YOU IMAGINE? IT WOULD BE A DREAM COME TRUE.
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Rosie Frost and the Falcon Queen by Geri Halliwell-Horner is out now and available to order here.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Geri Halliwell-Horner @gerihalliwellhorner
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Sep 26, 2023
S18, Ep4 Arlo Parks on the impossibility of perfection
Arlo Parks is a singer, songwriter and poet. Her debut album, Collapsed in Sunbeams was released when she was just 21 and earned her two Grammy nominations, a BRIT Award and the Mercury Music Prize. Her second, My Soft Machine, came out earlier this year. This month also marks the publication of her first volume of poetry, The Magic Border, a collection of never-before-seen poems and song lyrics.
Parks joins me to talk about her faiure to create a perfect piece of work, her failure to save others, her failure to fit into what other people think of her - and why Phoebe Bridgers epitomises 'big brother energy'. I loved talking to this beautiful human - her thoughtfulness and her lyrical expression will soothe you and make you think.
Enjoy!
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Arlo's poetry collection, The Magic Border, is out now.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Arlo Parks @arlo.parks
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Sep 19, 2023
S18, Ep3 Rory Stewart on why politics is broken - and what to do about it
Rory Stewart is a bestselling writer, podcaster, former politician, adventurer and charity boss. You might know him from his chart-topping podcast, The Rest is Politics, which features Stewart and Alastair Campbell disagreeing agreeably about issues of the day.
After Eton and Oxford, Stewart briefly joined the army and then the diplomatic service. In his 30s, he was elected as an MP, rising to become the Secretary of State for International Development. He stood - unsuccessfully - against Boris Johnson for leadership of the Conservative Party (a failure which haunts him still and which he discusses in this episode). Now, having resigned from politics entirely, he has published a book, Politics on the Edge, about his decade in parliament.
He joins me to talk about the failure of the political system, his own failure to solve it and I explain the rules of 'Shag, Marry, Kill' - never let it be said that I can't lower the tone, eh?
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Rory's new book, Politics on the Edge, is out now and available to order here.
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I'm going on tour! To AUSTRALIA, mate! You can now purchase tickets to see me live at Sydney Opera House on 26th February 2024 or the Arts Centre Melbourne on 28th February 2024.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Rory Stewart @rorystewartuk
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Sep 12, 2023
S18, Ep2 Sara Pascoe on fertility, fear and what success really means
TW: fertility and miscarriage
Sara Pascoe is a critically acclaimed comedian, writer and actor. Her latest stand-up tour is called - aptly enough for this podcast - Success and her debut novel, Weirdo, is published tomorrow. It's a dark, funny, stream-of-consciousness narrative ride through the internal machinations of Sophie, an anxious, sometimes obsessive, often unhappy woman trying to feel less lost. I gobbled it up.
Sara joins me to talk about failing at acting, why every year she promises herself she'll never do the Edinburgh Fringe again (and every year breaks that promise) and, in a heartbreaking third failure, she talks candidly about failing to get pregnant for over a decade, suffering a miscarriage, doing IVF and eventually having a baby but remaining in a state of high anxiety throughout her pregnancy. It's a beautiful conversation, and I am so grateful to Sara for talking about something that is very difficult to put into words. I know her courageous vulnerability will he…
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Sep 5, 2023
S18, Ep1 Miriam Margolyes on not marrying a nice Jewish doctor
WAHOOOOO! A whole new season of How To Fail, and WHAT an opening guest we have for you. Yes, it's the one and only Miriam Margolyes: actor, bestelling author and the nation's favourite talkshow guest. She's been described by Vogue as 'Britain's mischief-maker in chief' and started her career in radio and theatre, before moving into films (she won a Bafta for her role in Martin Scorcese’s The Age of Innocence and is beloved by legions of younger fans for playing Professor Sprout in the Harry Potter movies). Margolyes is a TV regular in shows such as Blackadder and Call the Midwife and is just about to publish the second instalment of her memoirs, Oh, Miriam!
Today, she joins us to talk about letting down her parents, the joy of friendship, her fear of letting her body down and the lifelong regret she has over telling her mother the truth of her own sexuality. A poignant, provoking and - yes - hilarious conversation. Enjoy!
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You can order Miriam's new memoir, Oh, Miriam! here.
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Aug 16, 2023
The F-Word Miniseries: Mo Gawdat and Elizabeth Day on Friendship
Welcome to The How To Fail F-Word miniseries! Three days, three guests, three different F-words.
In this final episode, the tables are turned and I’m the one being interviewed on...friendships. My interviewer is non other than my dear friend and beloved How To Fail repeat guest, the wonderful Mo Gawdat. And, as ever with us, the conversation goes both ways. This was recorded for Mo’s own podcast, Slow Mo, and released on his channels last month. Enjoy.
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You can find Mo's own podcast, Slo Mo, here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Mo Gawdat @mo_gawdat
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Aug 15, 2023
The F-Word Miniseries: Nigel Morris on leaving school at 15 and becoming a billionaire
Welcome to The How To Fail F-Word miniseries! Three days, three guests, three different F-words.
Today, we have Nigel Morris...on fuel.
Nigel Morris is the definition of a self-made man: born in Essex, the son of an army sergeant father and a Welsh mother, he left school at 15 before going on to co-found one of the biggest banks in the world, Capital One. How did he do it? What motivates him? How does he manage his ambition?
A slightly different How To Fail episode from usual, but perhaps an even more interesting one because of it. We don't get that many business people offering to share their failures in such an open way and I'm very grateful to Nigel for doing so.
This episode was recorded in front of a live audience at an annual event hosted by Clearscore, the free credit score app. Full disclosure: Clearscore is my husband's company. I was not paid a fee so this is not a branded episode (but they're really good fyi).
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by E…
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Aug 14, 2023
The F-Word Miniseries: Gabor Maté on Feelings
Welcome to The How To Fail F-Word miniseries! Three days, three guests, three different F-words.
Today, we start with Gabor Maté...on feelings.
Gabor is a renowned speaker, physician and author; a practitioner who has revolutionised our understanding of stress, addiction and childhood development. He has written four bestselling books, including the worldwide best-seller When the Body Says No which argued - controversially at the time - that stress had a major role in the onset of most chronic diseases. His latest work, The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness & Healing in a Toxic Culture, is co-authored with his son, Daniel. It outlines how true health is possible, but only if we are willing to embrace authenticity and acknowlege our true feelings.
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The Myth of Normal by Gabor Maté is out now and available to buy here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday…
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Jul 18, 2023
S17, BONUS EPISODE: Lucy Spraggan on survival, sobriety and staying true to herself
TW: discussion of sensitive issues including sexual assault, suicide and addiction
*This interview contains Lucy's account of sexual assault. That account starts about 30 minutes in and is flagged before we discuss it.*
I don't have many words to write about this extraordinary guest because I really need you to listen to her story, in her own words. The singer and songwriter Lucy Spraggan shot to fame as an X Factor contestant in 2012. She was just 20 when she was scouted to take part in the ITV series and she became an overnight sensation, with her audition watched by millions. But her time on the show was cut short after she was subjected to a horrific sexual assault. At the time, it was reported she had withdrawn from the talent contest owing to illness. That wasn't the case. For years, Lucy did not feel able to tell the story of what happened to her - until now.
This is Lucy's only podcast interview and it marks the publication of her incredible and courageous memoir, Process: Fi…
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Jul 13, 2023
S17 BONUS EPISODE! Dan Carter: one of the greatest rugby players of all time on what failure taught him about winning
Dan Carter is one of the greatest rugby players in the history of the sport. The former All Black is one of only a handful of players to have won multiple World Cups and holds the all-time international points scoring record. His other achievements include - ahem - being voted the world’s sexiest male athlete in 2010.
Today, in a very special bonus episode, Carter joins me to talk about how he learned to live alongside failure and how this made him into a better champion. I promise you this is not just for the rugby fans - Carter has so much to say about mindset and focus that I truly believe listening to him can help everyone take the first steps towards a more fulfilled life.
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You can pre-order Dan Carter's new book, The Art of Winning: Ten Lessons in Leadership, Purpose and Potential here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailp…
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Jul 4, 2023
S17, Ep10 Elliot Page on the transcendence of showing up as himself
This is one of those encounters that felt profoundly special because, no matter how much preparation I might have done, I truly don't think anything could have fully prepared me for the powerful honesty of Elliot Page.
In his only UK podcast interview to mark the publication of his bestselling memoir, Pageboy, Elliot joins me in our season finale to talk about his self-perceived failure at living a 'closeted' life, his failures in friendship and his inabilty to reach out for help when he needed it. He talks about the abusive homophobia in Hollywood, his battles to connect with the truth of his truest self and the euphoria he now feels when he is able to present physically as he really is.
Elliot moved me so deeply and I know anyone who listens to this will be meaningfully changed by it.
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You can order Elliot's memoir, Pageboy, here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabet…
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Jun 27, 2023
S17, Ep9 Mae Muller on failing to win Eurovision - but finding her voice
Mae Muller is a queen, icon and a legend and I won't hear anyone say differently. At 25, she is one of the hottest new talents in music. She was Great Britain's 2023 Eurovision entry with her own track, I Wrote A Song, and sure she came second last, but that didn't dim her shine for one single second. Her debut album, Sorry I'm Late, is released in September.
She joins me to chat about failing to win Eurovision and the pressure she felt in the run-up to the competition; failing in school exams and failling to recognise toxic relationships in her teens. She is funny, feisty, smart and wholly without pretension and I adored this conversation with her. Listen now to feel more joyful about life.
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Pre-order Mae's debut studio album, I'm Sorry I'm Late, here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Mae Muller @maemuller
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Jun 20, 2023
S17, Ep8 Yomi Adegoke on social media, mental health and reality TV
This week's guest is the journalist and author Yomi Adegoke. You might know her from her column in the Guardian or as the co-author of the brilliant 2018 non-fiction book, Slay In Your Lane or you might follow her on Instagram for her glamorous serving of LEWKS. And even if you don't know her, you should because she's the definition of good energy and you will love this episode.
Yomi joins me to talk about her failures in hodling down a 9-to-5, her experiences with depression while at university and her debut novel, The List, which has already been snapped up by HBO Max for TV adaptation.
In this episode, we touch on issues of race, gender and cultural influence and, thrillingly, I get to chat about reality TV with someone who takes it as seriously as I do. Lol.
Enjoy!
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Signed copies of The List by Yomi Adegoke are available to pre-order here.
Yomi will be in conversation with Bernardine Evaristo at the Southbank Centre in London on 20th July. Tickets are available here.
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How…
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Jun 13, 2023
S17, Ep7 Sir Ranulph Fiennes on adventure, fertility and living up to his father's memory
TW: infertility
You wait years for one globally renowned adventurer to come onto How To Fail, and then two appear in the same season! First it was Bear Grylls and now it's the turn of his mentor, Sir Ranulph Fiennes. I spoil you, I really do.
Sir Ranulph is one of the greatest British explorers - a man who has raised millions of pounds for charity through his exploits, which include the first north-south surface circumnavigation of the world, crossing Antarctica on foot and running seven marathons in seven days on seven continents despite suffering a heart attack and undergoing a double coronary artery bypass just four months before. He is also the oldest Briton ever to summit Mount Everest.
He joins me to talk about failing to follow in his late father's footsteps by flunking the Sandurst admission, his competitive drive, the dangers of solo expeditions and - in one especially memorable passage - the time he sawed off his own frostbitten fingers (those of a squeamish disposition may…
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Jun 6, 2023
S17, Ep6 Diana Evans: the bestselling author on writing routines, dealing with her inner critic and living life to the fullest
TW: Suicide
Diana Evans is the award-winning, bestselling author of A House for Alice, Ordinary People, The Wonder and 26a. Her third novel, Ordinary People, was one of my favourites of the year when it was published in 2018 - and it was shortlisted for the Women's Prize.
Now, she's written a critically acclaimed follow-up, A House for Alice, set against the backdrop of the Grenfell Tower tragedy. Diana joins me to discuss how she writes (and manages failure in her writing), the curse of perfectionism, the importance of tackling social justice in fiction and her abject inability to complete her list of '10 Things To Do Before I'm 50' in time. She also talks movingly about the death of her twin sister by suicide and how this forever shapes the life she now lives.
Thank you Diana, for opening up to me and for the magical words you put on the page.
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A House for Alice by Diana Evans is out now.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us…
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May 30, 2023
S17, Ep5 Bear Grylls on turning fear into courage
Bear Grylls has achieved worldwide fame as one of the most recognized faces of survival and outdoor adventure. A former SAS soldier, he has climbed Everest, circumnavigated the British Isles on a jet ski, rowed naked in a bathtub along the Thames and once broke his back in a parachuting accident.
But he's most famous for his TV career. He starred in seven seasons of the Discovery Channel’s Emmy Award-nominated Man vs. Wild TV series and hosted Running Wild, which has featured Bear taking President Obama, Julia Roberts, Roger Federer, Will Ferrell, Channing Tatum, and Kate Winslet on extreme adventures.
I'm so thrilled to have him on How To Fail because Bear has been talking about the need for bravery to co-exist with fear for as long as he's been in the public eye. He's got a really enlightening take on failure - and our need to learn from it.
He joins me to talk about losing his Dad young, failing SAS selection and the cancellation of his first TV show.
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Never Give Up by Bear Gr…
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May 24, 2023
S17 BONUS EPISODE: Rachel Cargle on reimagining the life we want to live.
TW: A heads-up that we talk about racism in this episode, and that we mention the murder of George Floyd and how this impacted Rachel's anti-racism work.
Rachel Cargle is a public academic, activist and author. Her debut book, A Renaissance of Our Own, is out TODAY and asks us to have the courage to live life according to our own values, rather than the ones we might have inherited or been conditioned to believe in. She joins me to talk about her anti-racism work, the 'weathering' effect such work has on Black bodies and her new-found understanding ease and joy have to form part of the same fight for equity. We also discuss her upbringing as the child of a disabled single mother, her divorce, her decision to be childfree, what happened when she dropped out of conventional academia, as well as her failures in business and what they have ended up teaching her about who she is.
Rachel is one of those people I just want to sit and listen to for hours. I barely had to ask any questions b…
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May 23, 2023
S17, Ep4 Dr Gladys McGarey: a 102-year-old doctor shares the secret to health and happiness
The word 'inspiration' is bandied about with a bit too much alacrity these days, but Dr Gladys McGarey truly _is _one of the most inspirational women you'll ever meet.
At 102 years old, she's still a practising doctor - she trained in conventional medicine but her innate curiosity led her to explore alternative healing therapies and she became the first physician ever to use acupuncture in the United States, where she is now known as the Mother of Holistic Medicine.
She joins me to impart her considerable wisdom about how to pursue a well-lived life. We discuss the importance of gratitude, boundaries and being in alignment with our joy. We also discuss her dyslexia and how, as a child, it was left undiagnosed and made her feel that she was stupid. We chat about the long journey to find her voice - as a woman, as a wife and as a mother. She opens up about how she coped with the end of her marriage after 46 years and the shock she experiencdd when her then-husband asked for a divorce. An…
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May 16, 2023
S17, Ep3 Alex Crawford: the legendary war correspondent on staying alive, motherhood and the resilience of hope
If you've ever watched a television news dispatch from a warzone, the chances are you've seen Alex Crawford in a flak jacket and helmet, doing a piece to camera punctuated by the whistle of bullets. For 30 years, she has been the special correspondent for Sky News and has covered conflicts in Libya, Syria and the Ukraine. She has scooped multiple Baftas and Emmys for her work, as well as being the only journalist to have won the Royal Television Society’s Journalist of the Year Award five times.
Today, she joins me in an extraordinary interview to reveal how she does it. We talk about professional failures, imposter syndrome, what happened when she got taken hostage in Afghanistan, the challenge of keeping a sense of optimism about human nature and how she processes the trauma she witnesses. She talks frankly about being a mother-of-four and how this has led to her own personal conflicts while reporting on the global ones. And we discuss how ageism and sexism plays a part in how she'…
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May 9, 2023
S17, Ep2 Jay Shetty on failing to fit in, learning to love and how to survive heartbreak
Jay Shetty is the monk-turned-self-help-guru who grew up in Wood Green, North London and now counts Will Smith among his closest friends. His mission - to make 'wisdom go viral' - has seen him become a number one bestselling New York Times author with over 14 million Instagram followers. His podcast - On Purpose - is the biggest health and wellbeing podcast in the world. His latest book, Eight Rules of Love, is a guide to finding, keeping, and sometimes, letting go of love.
In this interview, Jay talks about how to date, how to cope with rejection and break-ups and how to make compassionate decisions. He discusses his upbringing and his early struggles to fit in and what his time in the monastery taught him, as well as his failure to live up to his own standards of kindness. It's an enlightening listen. Thank you, Jay!
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Jay Shetty's latest book, Eight Rules of Lo…
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May 2, 2023
S17, Ep1 Rylan Clark on fame, heartbreak and the long journey to self-acceptance
We're back with a brand new season (17 but who's counting? I AM!) and to open the series, I truly could not have asked for a better guest.
Rylan Clark is a familiar presence on TV and radio and one of the BBC's hosts for Eurovision 2023. But he started out as the X Factor 'joke' performer in 2012. So how did he manage the transition from national laughing stock to national treasure?
We talk about the failures that made him: not fitting in at school, the end of his marriage, his struggles with body image and how he survived 'hitting rock bottom'. We also have a fascinating conversation about the nature of fame, and how he feels his 'real' self is separate from his public persona.
I adored this chat because Rylan is super-smart and willing to go deep. But he's also hilarious and had me crying with laughter.
I hope you enjoy the episode. And if you do, I'd love it if you could give How To Fail a nice little five-star rating wherever you get your podcasts!
It's good to be back.
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H…
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Apr 4, 2023
BONUS EPISODE! Mel Schilling: the MAFS dating expert on confidence, relationships and the secret to finding true love
TW: fertility
Regular listeners will know I'm a devoted watcher of Married At First Sight, so I squealed with joy when the brilliant Mel Schilling agreed to come on the pod. Not only is she one of Australia's foremost dating experts, but as a former psychologist and a specialist in human behaviour and performance, she's the perfect person to ask about how to find true love in the dating wilderness, how to feel more confident and what it's _really_ like filming MAFS behind the scenes. And rest assured, I asked ALL OF THIS AND MORE.
We also discuss how she only found the courage to pursue her passion later in life, why she dated 'all the emotionally unavailable men' in her 20s and 30s and her fertilty journey - please be aware, if you're currently going through a fertilty struggle yourself that you might find this part triggering (but you might also find it helpful - I know I did).
I love Mel so much and she's even better in person. I hope you enjoy the episode, and then enjoy catchin…
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Apr 2, 2023
BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail x Happy Place: The Ultimate Podcast Collab
Welcome to a very special episode of How To Fail where we join forces with one of our favourite podcasts, Happy Place. The wonderful Fearne Cotton and I sit down to chat about three of our personal highlights from each of our respective back catalogues. You'll hear from Emily Ratajowski, Mo Gawdat, Roman Kemp, Phoebe Waller-Bridge and more. We'll talk about mental health, feminism, race, step-parenting and an unforgettable comedy encounter involving apple crumble and Meryl Streep...
This was such a joy to record. I met Fearne through podcasting and she's become a dear friend. She's been a trailblazer in opening up vulnerable spaces for others and I'm so grateful to her for leading the way. We hope you enjoy this very special chat!
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My new book, FRIENDAHOLIC: Confessions of a Friendship Addict, is out now and available to purchase here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizab…
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Mar 29, 2023
S16, BONUS EPISODE! FRIENDAHOLIC: Confessions of a Friendship Addict - an exclusive extract from my new book,
SURPRISE! I thought I'd treat you to another bonus episode - not a conventional How To Fail but an exclusive extract from the audio version of my new book, Friendaholic: Confessions of a Friendship Addict which is published today. I hope you enjoy it - and if you do, feel free to order a copy here.
Thank you so much for listening to this season of How To Fail. I appreciate you!
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
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Mar 28, 2023
S16, BONUS EPISODE: Cody Rigsby on queerness, addiction and being Rishi Sunak's favourite Peloton instructor
TW: addiction
Regular listeners of How To Fail will know that I love Peloton: the one-stop fitness workout which offers cycling, strength, yoga and more. THIS IS NOT AN AD, JUST A GENUINE FEELING! Anyway, the undisputed King of Peloton is Cody Rigsby - an instructor who brings a combination of poptastic joy and savage sass to the bike. He is one of the most popular instructors on the platform, with over 1 million Instagram followers, and counts Prime Minister Rishi Sunak amongst his die-hard fans.
But Rigsby had a tough upbringing: his father died of a drug overdose when Cody was just four months old. Raised by a single mother who also had addiction issues, Rigsby endured spells of homelessness and financial instability. Growing up queer in North Carolina, he struggled to find role models or representation, which is why, on the Peloton bike, he uses it as 'a Trojan horse' of acceptance. Rigsby also talks movingly for the first time about losing his friend Oliver to addiction and his b…
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Mar 14, 2023
S16, Ep11 How To Fail: Bernie Sanders on defeat, defiance and the struggles that shaped him (plus: the power of mittens)
PINCH ME, IS THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENING? Yes, yes it is. Ok. Deep breaths. For my season finale, I bring you the one and only Bernie Sanders: the longest-serving independent member of Congress in American history; unofficial leader of the US progressive movement and a two-time former Presidential candidate.
He joins me to talk about his failed attempts to win the Democratic Party nomination, his failure to make his high school basketball team and the time he unwittingly went viral for wearing a pair of mittens to President Biden's inauguration. It's a conversation that will make you think and possibly make you angry (but that, as he explains, can be a good thing).
It was an honour to meet Senator Sanders and although he doesn't much like talking about himself, I gave it my best shot. I think this is probably his most personal interview yet. I found his reflections on how his childhood shaped his political outlook really fascinating. And I posed so many questions about whether he cries and…
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Mar 7, 2023
S16, Ep10 How To Fail: Margaret Atwood on wisdom, witchcraft and womanhood
For International Women's Day, I bring you - NO BIG DEAL - Margaret Atwood. The Booker-Prize winning author of numerous works including The Blind Assassin, Cat's Eye and Alias Grace, has been a pioneer in the depiction of women in literature, redefining the dystopian novel with her revolutionary 1985 book, The Handmaid's Tale, which went on to sell eight million copies and been adapted into a hit TV show.
Atwood's work is visceral, wise and sharply intelligent, so it's safe to say I was ever so slightly intimidated by the prosepct of interviewing her. But oh my goodness, what an utter delight she was. We talked about everything from astrology to cults to witchcraft and the scapegoating of women over the millennia. And we discuss her failures in needlework, musicals and a failed novel that led, circuitously, to the conception of The Handmaid's Tale.
I was on a high after this conversation for days and I hope you will be too.
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Margaret Atwood's new collection of short stories, Old Ba…
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Feb 28, 2023
S16 Ep9 How To Fail: Greg James on radio, rebellion and failing to be a good at fame
One of the only times my friend Fran has been truly impressed by a podcast guest was when I sent her a picture of me recording with Greg James. During the pandemic, Fran and her family would listen to him on Radio 1 every morning and he helped them through those long lockdown days with a necessary a dose of good cheer.
Many people around the country will relate to that story: since 2018, Greg has hosted BBC Radio 1’s iconic breakfast show, attracting around five million listeners every day. He's got one of the most beloved and familiar voices in broadcasting, so it's a total joy to welcome him to How To Fail.
He joins me to talk about his failures in cricket, in fame and...dog ownership.
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Greg James's new Formula 1 podcast, The Fast and the Curious is available to listen wherever you get your podcasts, along with his cricketing podcast, Tailenders, and Teach Me A Lesson with Greg James and Bella Mackie.
His chldren's books, co-authored with Chris Smith, are avaialble to buy here…
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Feb 21, 2023
S16, Ep8 How To Fail: Joan Bakewell - the legendary broadcaster on life, love and everything in between
For a long time, Joan Bakewell has been a professional inspiration to me: a broadcasting superstar whose professional longevity is a testament to her talent, curiosity and hard work. She is a few months shy of her 90th birthday but still as busy as ever, presenting Portrait and Landscape Artist of the Year for Sky Arts. She’s also a peer of the realm and the president of Birkbeck, University of London.
Baroness Bakewell joins me to talk about her extraordinary career interviewing everyone from Marcel Duchamp to Nelson Mandela. Plus: sexism, class, her failure to become an actress, her memories of the Blitz, her two divorces and her long-running affair with the esteemed playwright Harold Pinter.
It was such an amazing conversation and a real honour for me to talk to this thoroughly wonderful woman.
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My new book, FRIENDAHOLIC: Confessions of a Friendship Addict, will be published next month and is now available to preorder - at half price - here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day…
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Feb 14, 2023
S16, Ep7 How To Fail: Munroe Bergdorf on the beauty of transitions, breaking the rules and learning how forgive herself and others
TW: rape, racism and transphobia
I have admired this woman from afar for many years and was so honoured when she agreed to sit down with me for How To Fail. Munroe Bergdorf is impossible to summarise: she is an activist, model, writer and broadcaster but those words can't accurately convey how much she has done to shape our culture.
In her UTTERLY BRILLIANT new book, Transitional, Munroe draws on her own experience to reveal just how deeply ingrained transitioning is in human experience. It's a book that explores change and the fluidity of identity and relationships, sexuality and gender and it's so, so powerful.
She joins me to talk about the long journey to live her truth and how she overcame a lack of self-worth to understand she was worthy of healthy relationships. We talk about how she navigated PTSD, panic attacks and anxiety and about her refusal to play by the rules.
It is an extraordinary conversation, as befits an extraordinary person. But please do be aware that we cover so…
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Feb 7, 2023
S16, Ep6 How To Fail: Rick Edwards on confidence, competitiveness and the lessons he's learned from past relationships
Rick Edwards is a broadcaster, author and podcaster. He's the co-host of Radio 5 Live’s Breakfast Show and presents the podcast Eureka alongside the quantum physicist Dr Michael Brooks.
He's also, as it happens, my ex-boyfriend. In this episode, we not only discuss Rick's past failures but we do a post-match analysis of our own break-up. It's not often you get a chance to pore over your former relationship with an ex and enough time has elapsed (20 years, but...y'know...who's counting?) for us to feel able to do it. We hope that anyone listening who is currently going through heartbreak takes some comfort from knowing this is possible. Shout out to our respective spouses for being thorouglhy excellent people (Hi Emer and Justin! Thank goodness we're with you).
Also: there's a memorable anecdote involving Rick, a tube journey and a pair of underpants that has to be heard to be believed. You're welcome.
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Rick’s podcast_ Eureka! Getting under the skin of science _is available on a…
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Jan 31, 2023
S16, Ep5 How To Fail: Big Zuu the Bafta-winning TV cook on being the child of a refugee, his ADHD diagnosis and racism in football
Big Zuu is a double Bafta winning TV cook who presents Big Zuu’s Big Eats on Dave. His former guests have included Jimmy Carr, Katherine Ryan and Mel B. He's also a grime MC rapper who has released four albums. He joins me to talk about the impact of his upbringing - his mum arrived to a West London council estate from Sierra Leone when she was pregnant with him and it's an extraordinary story of resilience and survival over adversity. We also discuss his ADHD diagnosis in adulthood and how it's transformed his life, racism in football and how he learned to channel his energy into the right things. This was such an enlightening - and funny - chat.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Big Zuu @itsbigzuu
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Jan 24, 2023
S16, Ep4 How To Fail: Spencer Matthews on alcoholism, the death of his brother and surviving reality TV
SPENCER MATTHEWS! I confess, I enjoyed this conversation SO MUCH. It's not just because I'm an unabashed viewer of Made in Chelsea from the early days.* It's also because I've watched Spencer transcend his (decidedly not great) reality TV persona to become a successful entrepreneur, broadcaster, husband and father. I've always had a soft spot for him even though I've never actually _known_ him, partly because he's got a great sense of humour and real self-awareness. All of which makes him a delight to interview.
He joins me to talk about his failures in reality TV, his realisation that alcohol was becoming a problem in his life, the subsumed grief he felt after his beloved older brother Mike died while climbing Everest and his own desire to pursue extreme sporting endeavours. Please listen, even if you have preconceptions. We got on so well, and I really valued his openneness - I truly felt I could ask Spencer anything: and I often did.
*If you're also a die-hard MIC fan, I get him to…
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Jan 17, 2023
S16, Ep3 How To Fail: Yusra Mardini - how a teenage Syrian refugee became an Olympic swimmer against unimaginable odds
I can't find the right words to do enough justice to Yusra Mardini's story. I think it's best that you just listen to the episode. Suffice it to say, she's one of the most impressive people I've ever met. Yusra grew up in Damascus. When war broke out, she and her sister embarked on a perilous journey to Germany to seek asylum. En route, they nearly died when the dinghy they were using to cross the Aegean sea had an engine failure. Yusra and her sister Sara - both competitive swimmers - jumped overboard and helped to pull the boat to safety, saving all 18 people on board.
Yusra went on to compete in the 2016 Olympics, to become the youngest ever UNHCR Goodwill Ambassador and to publish a memoir that has now been made into a Netflix movie, The Swimmers.
Listen now to hear Yusra telling her story. It's unbelievably powerful.
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The Swimmers is available to watch on Netflix
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Choose Love does amazing work for refugees. If you'd like to donate or learn more, please visit their website…
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Jan 10, 2023
S16, Ep2 How To Fail: Alex Jones on fertility, mental health and the time she locked King Charles in the toilet
TW: miscarriage; infertility.
Oh Alex Jones, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways... Like many of you, I already felt I knew Alex before I met her. She is one of the most trusted and famliar faces on our TV screen as co-host of BBC's The One Show. But in person, she was EVEN lovelier than I could have imagined: warm, funny and totally genuine.
She's currently presenting an extraordinary documentary series on the W Channel which saw her train as a fertility assistant at one of Britain's leading clinics. Making Babies is one of the most emotional - and accurate - portrayals of fertility I've ever seen.
Alex joins me to talk about this, as well as her own experience of miscarriage. We talk about how she got fired from her first job for a number of hilarious professional errors of judgement - including the time she locked the future King in the toilet. And we discuss her self-perceived failure to understand the mental health challenges faced by loved ones, including her husband. It's…
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Jan 3, 2023
S16, Ep1 How To Fail: Rick Astley on never growing up, never giving up and how a difficult childhood shaped his success
We're back for a brand new season. Well...you didn't think we were ever GONNA GIVE YOU UP did you? (See what I did there?)
My childhood self is utterly thrilled that we get to open Season 16 with the legendary Rick Astley. The singing superstar who gained worldwide fame in the 1980s with hits such as Never Gonna Give You Up and who is now being discovered by a whole new generation thanks to the viral internet phenomenon known as Rickrolling (don't worry - I didn't know what this was either: he explains it on the pod). Now 56, Astley has 8 consecutive UK top 10 hits, more than 40 million album sales and 3 million TikTok followers to his name. Besides which, he's a thoroughly nice man.
We talk about his difficult upbringing, his failure to grow up and his inability to give up drinking good wine. Prepare yourself for a lot of entertainment, some laughs, a side-order of self-deprecation and yes, a few tears too.
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My Plan To Save The Planet, the new album by Rick Astley is out now and…
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Dec 27, 2022
S15, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Roman Kemp on mental health, male suicide and failing to be Batman
TW: discussions around suicide
The period between Christmas and New Year can be tough for many. That's why I wanted to bring you an episode designed to help you feel less alone, where my guest talks openly about his own mental health and his desire to make others take care of theirs.
Roman Kemp has presented the Capital FM breakfast show since 2017, attracting a weekly audience of almost six million. In August 2020, his best friend and the producer of his radio show, Joe Lyons died by suicide. Lyons’ death was deeply shocking to all who loved him, leaving Kemp bereft, angry and searching for answers. Kemp went on to present an acclaimed BBC documentary on male suicide and wrote a bestselling book, Are You Really OK? packed full of personal reflections and practical advice.
Here, Roman talks about the impact of Joe's death, about this own mental health and destigmatising the conversation around these issues. Along the way, we chat about his failed driving test, his failed career move…
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Dec 8, 2022
🎤 How To Fail LIVE: Craig David on racism, bullying and having the courage to open his heart again
All this week, I'll be dropping the recordings of our How To Fail live shows, held at Shoredtich Town Hall earlier this year.
On our final night, we welcomed Craig David to the stage and we were treated to a beautiful, vulnerable conversation (with added singing!) Craig brought such generosity and open-heartedness to this event, both with me and with the audience. Listen to be uplifted, inspired and also to hear Craig's note-perfect rendition of Fill Me In during the Q&A.
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This episode was recorded live at Shoreditch Town Hall on 8th October 2022 and sponsored by Stripe & Stare https://stripeandstare.com/
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What's Your Vibe? by Craig David is out now https://www.waterstones.com/book/whats-your-vibe/craig-david/9781529109726
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Craig David @craigdavid
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Dec 7, 2022
🎤 How To Fail LIVE: Sophie Ellis-Bextor on surviving ladette culture, toxic relationships and finding a room of her own
All this week, I'll be dropping the recordings of our How To Fail live shows, held at Shoredtich Town Hall earlier this year.
Today it's the turn of the very lovely Sophie Ellis-Bextor. The kitchen disco queen joins us to talk about being dropped by her record label, being rubbish at drawing and the challenges of juggling all the different aspects of her life (tbf she does have five children). Along the way, we discover she used to have a thriving black market enterprise selling Blue Peter badges in the playground - the SHOCK!
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This episode was recorded live at Shoreditch Town Hall on 7th October 2022 and sponsored by Beija London https://beija.london/
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Sophie Ellis-Bextor @sophieEB
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Dec 6, 2022
🎤 How To Fail LIVE: Caitlin Moran on parenting failures, body image and big vaginas
TW: eating disorders
All this week, I'll be dropping the recordings of our How To Fail live shows, held at Shoredtich Town Hall earlier this year.
Now, I know we shouldn't have favourites. Having a podcast and labelling one of your episodes as your 'favourite' is akin to choosing your preferred child. But, sod it, this is one of my favourite conversations of all time. Caitlin Moran is as brilliant, witty and generous as you might expect. Here, she talks about the terrible sadness of realising her daughter had an eating disorder and how she didn't deal with it in the right way at first. She also talks about childhood insecurities, learning to love herself, the joy of female solidarity and plenty more. You will laugh. But you might also cry, so do bring some tissues.
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This podcast was recorded on 6th October 2022 in Shoreditch Town Hall and is sponsored by Sweaty Betty. You have a chance to get 20% off everything until 14th December with the code HOWTOFAIL20. That’s 20% off every…
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Dec 5, 2022
🎤 How To Fail LIVE: Mo Gawdat, the world-renowned happiness expert on how to manage stress, how to live with grief and how to be happy
All this week, I'll be dropping the recordings of our How To Fail live shows, held at Shoredtich Town Hall earlier this year.
To kick off, I asked back one of our most cherished guests of all time: the inimitable Mo Gawdat. As regular listeners of How To Fail know, Mo first appeared on this podcast way back in season four. His interview blew my mind and changed how I lived my life. I asked him back during the first Covid-19 lockdown to help us navigate our way through the crisis. And now, here he is again: my very special friend, on how to handle anxiety, how to cope with grief (and keep on living through unimaginable loss), how to be happy and how to lean into love.
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This episode was recorded live at Shoreditch Town Hall on 5th October 2022 and sponsored by Sweaty Betty. You have a chance to get 20% off everything until 14th December with the code HOWTOFAIL20. That’s 20% off everything until 14th December with the code HOWTOFAIL20 on sweatybetty.com
Terms and conditions apply,…
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Dec 1, 2022
S15, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Sheila Hancock on stage-fright, self-doubt and being a wartime evacuee
Dame Sheila Hancock is one of our most esteemed actresses: her 1966 Broadway debut in Entertaining Mr Sloane earned her a Tony nomination and on TV, she has appeared in everything from Dr Who to Kavanagh QC, in which she starred alongside her late husband, John Thaw. She has also been a semi-regular contestant on the BBC Radio 4 panel game Just a Minute since - wait for it -1967.
The 89-year-old Dame Sheila joins me to talk about her crippling stage fright, her failure to enjoy the moment, her memories of being a wartime evacuee and her critical inner voice that means she's only ever able to remember the bad reviews while forgetting all the good ones. Enjoy!
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Old Rage by Sheila Hancock is out now: https://www.waterstones.com/book/old-rage/sheila-hancock/9781526647443
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Sheila Hancock @4SheilaH…
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Nov 29, 2022
S15, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Trinny Woodall on single parenthood, business failure and the empowerment of her 50s
TW: discussions around suicide, infertility and miscarriage
Trinny Woodall has been part of my life for years - even if we had never actually, well...met. Like many of you, I was riveted by the success of the makeover TV programme she presented with Susannah Constantine, What Not To Wear. Later, I would start buying Trinny London products and became mildly obsessed with their quality and efficacy (my make-up routine is now approximately 95% quicker). When she took to social media, I watched her Instagram styling videos looking for brilliant fashion tips. All in all, I felt we were friends even though she had no idea of this fact.
I'm not alone: many of you have requested Trinny as a guest and now, finally, I'm thrilled to oblige. In person, she is as frank, funny and real as you would expect. But what I didn't expect was the generous gift of her incredible honesty - we talk about how she navigated everything from business failure to addiction. We talk about her experiences with IVF an…
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Nov 28, 2022
S15, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Jo Elvin, the charity CEO on resilience, friendship fails and female anger
Today, in a special bonus episode, I have the joy of bringing you one of my favourite people - the broadcaster, journalist and now charity boss, Jo Elvin. She's an Australian powerhouse who I've been lucky enough to work with over several years (first when she was the editor of Glamour, then later when I became a columnist for You magazine under her reign) and now I just get to hang out with her as mates, which is even better.
She joins me to talk about the end of Glamour as a print magazine and having to make her beloved staff redundant, a failure in friendship where she felt she let down someone whose child was very ill and a struggle to control her temper (but, I ask: does it really *have* to be controlled?!).
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This episode is sponsored by Peloton – a fitness experience for your body and mind, so motivating and exhilarating that you’ll come back to it time and time again.
Find out more by visiting https://www.onepeloton.co.uk/
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If you enjoyed this episode, do conside…
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Nov 15, 2022
S15, Ep12 How To Fail: Justin Basini, the Clearscore CEO on business failure, body image and friendship
TW: discussion around suicide, body dysmorphia and disordered eating.
For my season finale, I wanted to do something a little different. I wanted to interview one of the most amazing people I know. Conveniently, that person is also my husband, Justin Basini, so it was pretty easy to co-ordinate diaries. As well as being my husband (arguably his most important qualification) Justin is also a highly successful entrepreneur and CEO. In 2015, he founded Clearscore, an app which provides free credit scores and reports, along with advice to help consumers make better financial decisions. It has now grown to over 18 million users, 460 employees and several international offices and is one the UK's leading fintech companies.
Justin joins me to talk about his first major business failure leading to a serious breakdown in his mental health and how he got through that. We also talk about his self-perceived failures in friendship. And in one of the most honest and eye-opening chats we have ever h…
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Nov 8, 2022
S15, Ep11 How To Fail: Geena Davis, the Oscar-winning actress on fame, feminism and being diagnosed with ADD in her 40s
I am obsessed with today's guest and I'm not even going to pretend otherwise. Geena Davis, the star of such seminal movies as Tootsie, Beetlejuice, Thelma & Louise, A League of Their Own and the underrated classic, The Long Kiss Goodnight, TURNED UP AT MY ACTUAL HOUSE to record a witty, warm and fascinating conversation.*
We talk about her feelings of imposter syndrome and self-doubt in the early days of her career, the fact that her failure as a model led to her first film role alongside Dustin Hoffman (who gave her incredible advice on how to defend herself against the amorous advances of her male co-stars) and the revelation of being diagnosed with ADD in her 40s. Along the way, we touch on height (she's 6ft! A tall woman like me!), the #MeToo movement, representation, almost becoming an Olympic archer, being an older mother and the seismic impact her friendship with Susan Sarandon had on Davis's life. I can't wait for you all to listen.
*yes, she met my ginger cat Huxley and they…
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Nov 4, 2022
S15, BONUS EPISODE How To Fail: Lorraine Kelly, the daytime TV icon on failing to go to uni, being fired and...penguins
Lorraine Kelly has been on our TV screens for the best part of 40 years. Born to working-class, teenage parents, she turned down a university place to join the local paper and then BBC Scotland as a researcher. By 1984, she was TV-AM’s Scotland correspondent. Today, she’s at the helm of the eponymous Lorraine show live every weekday morning.
In a special bonus episode, she joins me to talk about everything from the power of drag to the TV executive who told her to change her accent to how being fired on maternity leave was actually the making of her via her worries that she only had one child and her passion for penguins. Yes. Penguins. Enjoy!
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Queens for the Night airs tomorrow night on ITV at 8.30pm
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Lorraine Kelly @lorrainekellysmith
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Nov 1, 2022
S15, Ep10 How To Fail: Tom Daley, the Olympic diving champion on his fear of mistakes, body image and perfectionism
Tom Daley is an Olympic gold medallist diver, a three time World Champion and the first ever British person to win four Olympic diving medals. He's also, for the purposes of this podcast, just such a lovely, joyous person.
He joins me to talk about diving failures, choking at the Rio Olympics, anxiety, body image, the curse of perfectionism, parenthood via surrogacy and what knitting has taught him about mistakes (surprisingly profound fyi). Plus: how he persuaded Kate Moss to pose for his GCSE photography project.
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Made with Love, Tom Daley's guide to knitting and crochet, is out now and available to order here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Made-Love-step-step-award-winning/dp/0008546827
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Tom Daley @tomdaley
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Oct 25, 2022
S15, Ep9 How To Fail: Greta Thunberg on activism, friendship and failing to be a 'normal' teenager
I'll be honest. I was intimidated by the prospect of this interview. Plus, I never believed it would *actually* happen. I was going to get to speak to arguably the most famous activist on the planet? Yeah, right. As if.
But then - it happened! And Greta Thunberg - the founder of the School Strike for Climate movement who has been nominated three times for a Nobel Prize - was an absolute revelation. She is a deeply intelligent and thoughtful 19-year-old: someone who takes issues seriously but never herself. I laughed SO MUCH more than I thought I would during this conversation. And I learned a lot too - about the climate crisis, yes, but also about what drives this extraordinary young woman and what she thinks of 'failure' on a personal and a global level. We talk about her failure to be a 'normal' teenager, her failure to get politicians to act and how she copes with being trolled by Presidents. Plus what she *really* thinks of everyone from King Charles to Emmanuel Macron. And: her l…
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Oct 19, 2022
S15, BONUS EPISODE How To Fail: Rob Delaney on the death of his beloved son, Henry
Today, in a very special bonus episode, I bring you an interview it was an honour to record.
Rob Delaney is a comedian, actor and writer, known to many of us as the star and co-creator of the hit Channel 4 sitcom, Catastrophe. But behind the public smile, he has dealt with unfathomable private tragedy. In 2018, Rob and his wife's beloved son Henry died at the age of two-and-a-half of a brain cancer. Delaney’s memoir of this time, A Heart That Works, is published today. It is an astonishing, honest account of the darkest possible human experience: the story of what happens when your child dies, and of everything you discover about life in the process.
This is not an easy listen, but it is also an episode full of hope, insight and - yes - even humour. Listen to understand a little more of what it is to be human. Listen to make Henry's acquaintance. Listen to hear a first-hand account of love at the extremity of experience.
Rob: thank you so much for trusting me. Henry: this one's f…
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Oct 18, 2022
S15, Ep8 How To Fail: Malorie Blackman, the iconic Noughts and Crosses author on rejection, racism and the importance of representation
TW: miscarriage
Today's guest is one of our most beloved writers: the one and only Malorie Blackman. She joins me to talk about how her setbacks have helped her define who she is - from being evicted and made homeless as a child, to the early years of writing rejection when over 80 publishers turned her down and the devastating loss of her second pregnancy. Throughout it all, Malorie Blackman has survived and thrived. In 2013 she was appointed the Children’s Laureate and now, at the age of 60, her books (including her most famous YA novel series, Noughts & Crosses) are a staple of the GCSE curriculum. In this interview, she talks about the power of resilience. It's a must-listen.
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Malorie Blackman's memoir, Just Sayin', is out tomorrow and available to buy here: https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/441213/just-sayin-by-blackman-malorie/9781529118674
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Med…
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Oct 11, 2022
S15, Ep7 How To Fail: Nihal Arthanayake on fatherhood, chicken bongs and the most difficult conversation he's ever had
Nihal Arthanayake is a broadcaster and author. He is the host of Radio 5 Live’s Afternoon Show and won interviewer of the year at the 2019 BBC Radio and Music Awards. His new book, Let’s Talk: How To Have Better Conversations, investigates the art of good dialogue - a skill that has served him handsomely in his chosen career.
He joins me to talk about his academic failures, his failures as a son, husband and father, and his failures in friendship. Plus he makes me burst out laughing with an anecdote involving Method Man and a chicken bong (not a typo). Listen to the full episode to find out more...
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Nihal's book, Let's Talk, is out now and available to purchase here: https://www.waterstones.com/book/lets-talk/nihal-arthanayake/9781398711464
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Nihal Arthanayake @therealnihal
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Oct 4, 2022
S15, Ep6 How To Fail: Jordan Stephens on male vulnerability, anger and getting naked
Jordan Stephens was formerly one-half of the band Rizzle Kicks, formed with his childhood friend while they were both at school. He is now an actor, a solo musician, a writer and - as if that weren't enough - a gifted artist too. He's also a super smart, funny and perceptive human. It's always a joy to talk to him and today's episode was no exception - we cover male vulnerability, sobriety, competitiveness, the challenges of fame (and dating a celebrity superstar but keeping it private), the dangers of reality TV and how the phrase 'toxic masculinity' has outlived its usefulness. Plus, his failure...to get naked. Not one we've ever had before on the pod, but well worth a listen!
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Jordan's children’s book, The Missing Piece, is out now and available to buy here: https://www.waterstones.com/book/the-missing-piece/jordan-stephens/beth-suzanna/9781526618139
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted and produced by Elizabeth Day. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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So…
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Sep 27, 2022
S15, Ep5 How To Fail: Domenica Calarco, the star of Married At First Sight Australia on divorce, anxiety and reality TV
Well, you asked. And here she is. Domenica Calarco, the breakout star from the latest season of Married At First Sight Australia, is one of my most requested guests. On screen, we fell in love with her feisty Italian character, her brutal honesty and her friendship with fellow contestant Ella May Ding. Off screen, Domenica is an absolute treasure: hilarious, talkative and with plenty to say about the whole MAFS experience. Yes, we talk about Olivia. Yes, we talk about Jack. Yes, we talk about Mitch. But if you've never watched MAFS and you don't know what I'm on about, fear not - this is also a beautiful conversation about the shame she felt as a young divorcee and how her quest for love led her into a life-changing decision that ultimately brought her happiness (but not in the way you'd expect). Domenica talks openly about her struggles with anxiety, panic attacks, her feelings of failure and her experiences with internet trolling and becoming a public figure overnight. Listen to be m…
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Sep 20, 2022
S15, Ep4 How To Fail: Florence Given on shame, sexuality and finding her voice
TW: eating disorders
Florence Given is the ultimate feminist multi-hyphenate: an artist, a bestselling author, a podcaster and a social activist with a huge online following, especially among the young women who see her as the wise big sister they always wanted.
She wrote and illustrated her debut book, Women Don't Owe You Pretty, which spent 12 weeks in the Sunday Times top 10, making her the youngest author ever to achieve this goal. Last year, she launched her own podcast, Exactly with Florence Given, and last month she published her first novel which shot to Number One in the bestseller lists.
She joins me to talk about rejection, boundaries, anxiety, friendships, her struggles with disordered eating as a teenager, sexual exploration and hilariously recounts her mortifying first ever date with a woman.
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If you would like to attend one of the first ever LIVE How To Fail recordings on 5th-8th October, you can book tickets here: https://www.fane.co.uk/how-to-fail
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Girl Crush…
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Sep 13, 2022
S15, Ep3 How To Fail: Melanie Chisholm on mental health, self-worth and the Spice Girls
TW: eating disorders; suicide; sexual assault
I am so honoured to welcome my first ever Spice Girl to How To Fail! Today Melanie Chisholm - the artist formerly known as Mel C or even Sporty Spice - joins me in what is arguably her most open interview yet.
She tells me about the impact of her parents' divorce, the extreme lengths of her people-pleasing as one of the most famous stars of the 1990s and her own struggles with her body. She talks bravely about the toxic impact of media attention on her weight, and how she developed an eating disorder. This led her into a very dark mental space where she felt dishonest about the image she was portraying to the outside world. Melanie also opens up about a sexual assault she endured while on tour in Turkey and her thoughts of suicide at her lowest points.
And yet the extraordinary thing about Melanie is her resilience and her enduring gentleness. She is SO lovely, and we also have laugh-out-loud moments, including an unforgettable karaoke a…
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Sep 6, 2022
S15, Ep2 How To Fail: Edward Enninful, the editor of British Vogue on body image, diversity and the joy of being friends with Naomi Campbell
This week I interview quite possibly the kindest man in fashion. I love him so much - and I know you will too. Edward Enninful is a pioneer: the first Black person and the first man to edit British Vogue, one of the most powerful magazines in the world. He was born in Ghana, emigrated with his family to the UK as a teenager and worked his way up through the fashion industry from model, to stylist and beyond.
His new memoir, A Visible Man, charts this extraordinary trajectory and today, on How To Fail, Edward reveals the challenges that made him who he is today: from failing at singing, to dropping out of higher education and a self-perceived failure at weight loss that takes us to the heart of the fashion industry's historic problem with diversity. This is a fascinating, open-hearted conversation. Thank you, Edward. And rush out to buy his memoir now!
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A Visible Man by Edward Enninful is out now and available to buy here: https://www.waterstones.com/book/a-visible-man/edward-ennin…
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Aug 30, 2022
S15, Ep1 How To Fail: Vanessa Feltz on divorce, body-shaming and Big Brother breakdowns
Welcome to Season 15 of How To Fail! And there could be no better woman for our first episode than the iconic Vanessa Feltz. I was so COMPLETELY blown away by her honesty, humour and her brilliance when we met that I knew straight away I had to make her the season opener.
She joins me to talk about the breakdown of her marriage, her shock at discovering her husband's infidelity and how she had to rebuild her life in the aftermath. She also discusses the failure of her chat-show, the toxic media attention paid to her weight and what enduring such challenges in public taught her about resilience. And - of course - she chats about THAT infamous moment on Celebrity Big Brother 2001.
I admire this woman so much and I can't wait for you all to listen to this powerful episode to have your preconceptions shattered. (Unless your preconception happens to be 'Vanessa is a total legend' in which case, it will be re-affirmed).
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced…
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Jul 19, 2022
S14, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Jane Goodall
The legendary Jane Goodall is a scientist, convservationist and humanitarian, whose 60-year study of wild chimpanzees in Tanzania challenged and overturned much of the conventional scientific thinking at the time. Her tireless work over the years - she is now 88 - has won her a legion of admirers, including David Attenborough, Leonardo di Caprio, Prince Harry and Greta Thunberg who calls Goodall ‘a true hero’. She joins me to talk about the resilience of hope, whether chimpanzees have a sense of failure, her own failures in language, correspondence and motherhood, and her belief in the next generation. This was one of the most enlightening podcast interviews I've ever had the privilege of doing. Please listen!
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Jane Goodall's latest book, The Book of Hope: A Survival Guide for Trying Times, is out next week in paperback and is available to pre-order here https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/320237/the-book-of-hope-by-goodall-jane/9780241479469
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is…
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Jul 12, 2022
S14, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Kit de Waal
Our extra-special bonus guest today is the author Kit de Waal. Her debut 2016 novel, My Name Is Leon, told the story of a mixed-race nine-year-old boy and his quest to reunite his family after being taken into care. It won the Irish Book of the Year Award and has recently been adapted for TV starring Lenny Henry. Her second novel, The Trick to Time was longlisted for the 2018 Women’s Prize. A short story collection followed, and now de Waal has turned her gaze onto her own life. Her memoir, Without Warning and Only Sometimes, is out next month and tells the moving story of being raised by a Caribbean father and an Irish Jehovah's Witness mother who believed Armageddon was coming.
Kit joins me to talk about how reading became her salvation, the experiences of being mixed race and working class, her failure to read enough women and her failure to adopt a child. Plus - and here's the big one - her failure to ride a bicycle.
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Without Warning and Only Sometimes by Kit de Waal is avail…
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Jul 5, 2022
S14, Ep9 How To Fail: Russell Kane
TW // descriptions of self-harm
Russell Kane is a comedian, novelist, playwright, podcaster, memoirist and presenter. He's know for his sell-out stand-up gigs across and for his TV work, including Live At the Apollo and Celebrity Juice. Plus he has two -count 'em - podcasts, Evil Genius and Man Baggage.
I think Russell is genuinely one of the smartest people I've ever interviewed and his mind functions at about three times the speed of everyone else's. It was a real honour to talk to him, especially because he's a fan of the podcast and came ready, willing and able to open up. His failures include his inability to relax, his 20s and his failure to be fully authentic. And, for the first time ever, he opens up about his experiences with self-harm, and how he finally sought help during one of the darkest episodes of his life.
This is such a riveting and enlightening listen. Thank you so much, Russell.
And this is the last episode of the season - but don't worry, you know me, we'll be ba…
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Jun 28, 2022
S14, Ep8 How To Fail: Asim Chaudhry
As well as being a stone-cold legend, Asim Chaudhry is probably best known for co-creating the BAFTA-award-winning mockumentary sitcom People Just Do Nothing and if you’ve ever been on a British Airways flight and paid attention to the safety video, you’ll recognised him instantly as the inept director of a sketch involving national treasures Sir Michael Caine and Olivia Colman. He's an actor, writer, director and musician. And he's also hilarious.
He joins me to chat about failing drama class and being kicked out of school with two GCSEs, the time he got deported from America (no, really) and a vicious mugging that left him questioning what life was all about. Along the way we discuss comedy as a defence mechanism, using his dad as creative inspiration and why he wasn't sure about the jeans he was wearing on the day he came to my house.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail…
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Jun 21, 2022
S14, Ep7 How To Fail: Benjamin Zephaniah
Benjamin Zephaniah was the author of the first poetry collection I ever owned. For many of us, he was the chronicler of our youth: a novelist and poet who made language exciting and funny and told stories full of action and hilarity.
I was so excited to get to speak to him for today's episode, and he didn't let me down. We talk about his failure as a 'gangsta' - and his early brushes with the law (he served a prison sentence for burglary) as well as what being incarcerated taught him. We talk about his failures at school, his dyslexia and leaving mainstream education at the age of 13. And, in one of the most emotional conversations I've ever had on the topic, we talk about his failure to have children and his own journey with male infertility. It's the first time I've spoken about fertility struggles with a male guest, and it's a conversation I'll never forget. Just a note to say: we both get emotional and if you're feeling in a fragile space yourself because you're going through somet…
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Jun 14, 2022
S14, Ep6 How To Fail: Warsan Shire
TW // eating disorders
I'm biased but oh my goodness, I love this guest and this episode SO much. Ahead of Refugee Week, which runs 20-26th June, it is my honour to welcome the poet Warsan Shire to the podcast. Warsan was born in Kenya to Somali parents. She migrated with her family to the UK at the age of one and her powerful poem Home - which opens with the line ‘no one leaves home unless home is the mouth of a shark - has become the unofficial anthem to raise awareness of the refugee crisis. She's also a frequent collaborator with Beyonce - her poems are featured in the singer's seminal visual album, Lemonade. Now, at the age of 33, Warsan’s first full length collection, Bless the Daughter Raised by a Voice in Her Head, has just been published to critical acclaim.
Warsan joins me to talk about her failures in everything from breastfeeding to maths. We also talk about her eating disorder and her 'failure to control it'. We discuss what 'home' really means and what it is to…
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Jun 9, 2022
S14, MID-SEASON BONUS! How To Fail: Caroline Stanbury
Look, anyone who knows me knows of my love for reality TV. And anyone who knows anything about reality TV realises that when you get the chance to interview a bona fide Real Housewife, you jump at it. Which is why today's special bonus episode is with Caroline Stanbury.
Now, if you're not versed in your Bravo TV herstory or your pre-Selling Sunset heritage, you might not have heard of Caroline. She first appeared on our screens in 2014 as one of the cast members of the (sadly) short-lived Ladies of London. Viewers were either riveted by her ice-maiden ways or really quite scared. I was one of the latter, but I couldn't stop watching.
This is a woman born into privilege and old English money who went on to make her name in a completely different - and some might say, antithetical - world. Now she's back on our screens as part of The Real Housewives of Dubai.
I've never interviewed anyone quite like Caroline. She is impressive almost *because of* her lack of self-reflection: she just dus…
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Jun 7, 2022
S14, Ep5 How To Fail: Michael Rosen
My sound engineer Chris is a lovely man, but he is not easily impressed. After an interview, if Chris says 'yeah, that was good' I know I've struck GOLD. Today's episode garnered TWO SEPARATE 'yeah that was good'(s) from Chris which is why I know it's a very special one. And of course it would be, because my guest is the truly wonderful Michael Rosen. He is the author of more than 200 books, including some of the most beloved children’s stories of all time. We’re Going on a Bear Hunt is one of his, a book which is now (terrifyingly) over 30 years old.
When the Covid-19 pandemic hit in March 2020, Michael was one of the first to be hospitalised. He spent 47 days in Intensive Care, some of them in an induced coma and on a ventilator. He returned home in June to discover that his poem, These Are The Hands, had become a viral anthem for NHS care workers.
He joins me to talk about all of this, as well as his failures in cricket, academia and health. In one of the most moving conversatio…
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May 31, 2022
S14, Ep4 How To Fail: Natasha Brown
Natasha Brown is the author behind one of my favourite novels of recent years. Assembly runs to 100-pages and has already been compared to Virginia Woolf's Mrs Dalloway. It was shortlisted for both the Folio and the Goldsmiths Prize, as well as being named the Foyles Bookshop Book of the Year. It tells the story of an unnamed Black British woman working at a bank in the city, who is confronted with the numbing aggression of racist encounters and systems as she confronts a life-or-death decision.
When I first met Natasha, I knew I had to get her on the podcast. She is so wise, clever and emotionally intelligent. She talks to me about failures in social media, learning French and a tele-sales job that taught her about the power of language itself. We also discuss how she feels about failure given her objective levels of success, the concept of separating your own identity from what it is you do, race as a construct and what 'privilege' really means (if anything). Also: what she learned f…
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May 24, 2022
S14, Ep3 How To Fail: Jarvis Cocker
Todays' guest is Jarvis Cocker: musician, writer, broadcaster. He was the frontman of Pulp, one of the most successful 90s Britpop groups whose hit, Common People, turned Jarvis into a star at the age of 32.
He joins me to talk about the vagaries of fame, his failures in acting and academia, abandonment by his father, being raised by a household of women and the impact this has had on him, as well as divorce, co-parenting, clearing out the loft and why ephemera is an important part of our culture. Plus, he gives me a Birmingham-based anecdote that I think might be one of the greatest metaphors for celebrity I've ever heard.
Jarvis's book. Called Good Pop, Bad Pop, is out TOMORROW https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/111/1114959/good-pop--bad-pop/9781787330566.html
He will be in conversation at the Royal Festival Hall in London at 7.30pm on Friday 27th May. Book here: https://www.southbankcentre.co.uk/whats-on/literature-poetry/jarvis-cocker-good-pop-bad-pop
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How To Fail With Elizabeth…
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May 19, 2022
S14, Ep2 How To Fail: Minnie Driver
Ugh. Today's guest is just SO GOOD. Minnie Driver, actress, musician and writer, was nominated for an Academy Award for Good Will Hunting and later starred in TV shows such as Will & Grace and Starstruck. Her (brilliant) debut book is called Managing Expectations and is described as a ‘tell-most memoir’. In her own words, it’s about how things not working out actually worked out in the end.
She joins me to talk about her failures in acting, her failure to get an agent or to perform a convincing orgasm at an audition (a crash course in sexism in the industry), her run-ins with Harvey Weinstein, her experiences in the fakery of Hollywood and how that affected her mental health, and her self-perceived failure to get married. We also touch on the death of her beloved mother, becoming a single parent herself and what it means to be a fully-realised woman in her 50s. I adored this conversation - Minnie is so wise and eloquent and has really, truly spent time thinking about what life me…
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May 17, 2022
S14, Ep1 How To Fail: Simu Liu
We're back, baby! And I thought I'd open this new season with a bona fide SUPERHERO. Because that's just how we roll.
My guest today is Simu Liu - the first Asian superhero in the Marvel cinematic universe and the star of the 2019 movie Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings. He also appeared in season 4 of Selling Sunset, where Chrishell tried to sell him a house (arguably the real achievement, amirite?).
Simu was born in China. His parents were products of Mao's Cultural Revolution and ended up emigrating to Canada. Simu was raised by his grandparents for the first four years of his life before being taken to Canada, where he couldn't speak the language. It was an early lesson in resilience - one he would never forget.
Simu joins me to talk about this, as well as his failed accountancy career, a formative heartbreak and failing to get a part in Crazy Rich Asians. Along the way we discuss 'the white gaze' and marginalisation in Hollywood, the dark days of his adolescence when he…
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Apr 26, 2022
BETWEEN SEASON BONUS! How To Fail: Colin Hehir
TW: This is an episode in which we talk about violence, loss and grief.
This bonus episode is one of the most special, moving encounters I've ever had while doing this podcast. It was prompted by an incredible book I read while I was away over Christmas - a book unlike any other. But to explain how it came about, I need to take you back a few years.
On 31st October 2015, 20-year-old Morgan Hehir was walking home after a night out with friends when he was viciously attacked by a group of strangers and stabbed in a random act of violence. He died later in hospital. In the aftermath of this tragedy, his father, Colin, started keeping a diary both of his grief and of his long fight to bring his son's killer to justice.
That diary has now been turned into an extraordinary book, About A Son, written by the acclaimed novelist David Whitehouse. It’s a book that moved me to tears with its empathy and precision. And it’s a book that has brought me to Colin Hehir, who is today's guest on thi…
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Mar 22, 2022
S13, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Candice Carty-Williams
So many people have requested this guest and now I'm beyond thrilled to oblige! Yes, that's right it's author Candice Carty-Williams whose first novel, Queenie, became a publishing sensation. Queenie won the 2019 Book of the Year at the British Book Awards making Carty-Williams the first Black author to do so.
Now, her second novel People Person is about to be published, a TV adaptation of Queenie for Channel 4 is in the works and she’s writing an original drama for the BBC.
She joins me to talk about growing up in South London, re-writing her novel through lockdown, why she regrets not having therapy sooner and what she's learned about boundaries. Plus: Amy Winehouse. She also opens up about the death of one of her closest friends and what it taught her. And: why readers assuming her books are autobiographical is actually kind of annoying.
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People Person is published next month but you can pre-order it here: https://www.waterstones.com/book/people-person/candice-carty-williams/9…
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Mar 17, 2022
Best Friend Therapy: trailer
I'm launching a BRAND NEW PODCAST, hosted with my best friend (and professional therapist) Emma Reed Turrell. Best Friend Therapy launches on 28th March. Search for it wherever you get your podcasts and hit the subscribe button now to make sure you never miss an episode! Two best friends. One therapist. Zero filter.
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Mar 15, 2022
S13, BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Ashley Walters
Yes, it's the one and only Top Boy himself: Ashley Walters. As Dushane, the East London drug kingpin in Netflix's hit show Top Boy, Walters is our favourite kind of antihero - and it’s a role he’s about to reprise for the fourth series.
He joins me to talk about his own upbringing in Peckham, South London, an only child raised on a council estate by his mother, Pamela, and what it was like combining that reality with a burgeoning love for acting which sometimes felt like a double life. Plus, his failure to have invented Deliveroo (it's a long story), what prison taught him, the failure of toxic masculinity, his failure to remember lines and what being recognised by strangers has made him feel about this inner worth. I love love LOVE this episode because Ashley was so open and vulnerable in a way that just adds to his power. Enjoy!
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Mar 1, 2022
S13, Ep8 How To Fail: Delia Smith
Yes, it's the SEASON FINALE so you bet I'm going to use CapsLock. And for our final episode of Season 13, I speak to the cooking legend that is Delia Smith.
But if you're expecting a chat about her failure to poach an egg in 1986, you're very much mistaken. Because, at 80, Delia has just written a new book about the meaning of life. Called You Matter, it's an insightful inquisition into what it is to be human. She joins me to talk about human evolution and where it's leading us, as well as why failure is an integral part of getting to know ourselves.
This is such an interesting episode: I loved chatting to Delia but we didn't spend that long on her actual three failures. Instead we talked more broadly about life, love, loss, faith, meditation (without using that specific word) and everything in between. She tells me about what it's like to be a cooking icon, why she hates Masterchef and the sous-vide machine and yes, we do talk about THAT moment of 'let's be having you' at the Norwich…
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Feb 22, 2022
S13, Ep7 How To Fail: Dr Rangan Chatterjee
Rangan Chatterjee is one of the most influential doctors in the UK and has pioneered a different kind of approach in healing the sick. He believes almost everyone has the ability to transform their health and their happiness through making small, sustainable everyday changes. It shouldn't be revolutionary - but it is. And it's a message he's taken to TV, radio and his own hit podcast, Feel Better, Live More.
He joins me to talk about how why happiness is like a 'three-legged stool', why self-compassion is a superpower and why he once slapped himself on the face while playing pool. He opens up about his self-perceived failure to look after his son during a terrifying illness, his failure to lose well and his failure to be himself.
Rangan is such a lovely, kind man. I feel so jealous of anyone who gets to have him as their GP (although I do actually love my GP...shout out to the Mawbey Group Practice massive! Whoop whoop!) Anyway, I hope you enjoy putting this episode in your ears.
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Feb 15, 2022
S13, Ep6 How To Fail: Self Esteem
I'm so excited about today's guest. Self Esteem has been providing me with my preferred soundtrack for life, the universe and just about everything since the release of her BRILLIANT second album, Prioritise Pleasure, last year. I'm not the only one who's obsessed - it was the Guardian's album of the year and earned her a Brit Award nomination. If you haven't yet listened to her soaringly beautiful anthem, I Do This All The Time, then do that right after you've heard this. Promise? Ok, then.
Rebecca Lucy Taylor, was born and raised in Rotherham, before becoming one half of indie folk duo Slow Club. When the band broke up, Taylor reinvented herself as a solo artist. Her name? Self Esteem. She joins me to talk about her failure to get into drama school, her failure to 'make it' in music, and her failure at 'happy ever after' in relationships. We also discuss body image, toxic partners and what success really means. It's a goodie. Enjoy.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by…
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Feb 8, 2022
S13, Ep5 How to Fail: Munya Chawawa
Munya Chawawa is the comedian who repeatedly went viral during the pandemic thanks to his hilarious social media videos. His parody of the Shaggy song, It Wasn’t Me, in which he satirised the former health secretary Matt Hancock’s extra-marital dalliance, has been viewed over a million times on YouTube. He's also a presenter on the Channel 4 show Complaints Welcome and was nominated for a 2021 MOBO Award for Best Media Personality.
Munya joins me to talk about Zimbabwean discipline, the art of satire and dressing up as a urine sample (yes, you did read that correctly). We also talk about his A-Level failure and that one time he accidentally sent a nude he really regrets.
Prepare to laugh until your belly aches.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
How To Fail @howtofailpod
Munya Chawawa @munyachawawa
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Feb 1, 2022
S13, Ep 4 How To Fail: Andi Oliver
TW // eating disorders and discussion of racist experiences
Oh be still my beating heart, because today's episode is with one of my favourite people on this planet! She is Andi Oliver, TV presenter extraordinaire, beloved cook and restauranteur, and my sister from another mister. On screen, you will see her presenting Great British Menu, the Sky Arts Book Club (with yours truly) and an array of acclaimed documentaries, including her most recent: The Caribbean with Andi and Miquita.
Andi came to How To Fail with a total willingness to be vulnerable. We talk about her failure to crack the music industry and the death of her beloved brother, Sean, at the age of 27. We talk about her failure, as she puts it, 'to stop berating myself for not being in a much slimmer body' which leads us into one of the most moving conversations I've ever had about the terrible cost of living with an eating disorder. We talk about her experiences of racism growing up in rural England and how she grew to lo…
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Jan 25, 2022
S13, Ep3 How To Fail: Alan Cumming
*TW // brief mention of childhood abuse*
Alan Cumming is a highly acclaimed actor on both stage and screen. He's played everything from Hamlet to a James Bond villain - and, of course, the political spinmeister Eli Gold on seven seasons of The Good Wife. His latest memoir, Baggage, was published last year and was described as 'wonderful, witty and wise' by Nigella Lawson.
He joins me to talk about his self-stated failure to have children, his failure to see Kate Bush live and - bear with me - his failure to spit. Yes, you read that correctly.
This was such a deep and stimulating conversation. We cover so much, including Alan's abusive upbringing at the hands of his father and what that taught him about self-worth, vulnerability and sexuality. I am so grateful for Alan's curiosity about life and his refusal to shy away from the darker stuff. And also for teaching me why memory is like drained spaghetti... (Trust me: it's a good metaphor).
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Alan Cumming's latest memoir, Baggage,…
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Jan 18, 2022
S13, Ep2 How To Fail: Steven Bartlett
Today's guest is Steven Bartlett: millionaire by 25, Sunday Times bestseller by 28, the youngest ever Dragon on Dragon's Den by 29. He's also the host of The Diary of a CEO podcast, which recently reached the number one slot on both Apple Podcasts and Spotify. And all this before his 30th birthday. Honestly, I'd have to hate him if I didn't think he was so great.
Steven joins me to talk about his first business failing, a relationship break-up, toxic masculinity, his failure to tap into his feminine side, the art of making decisions and the power of knowing when to quit.
I went on Steven's podcast last year, and it felt as though this chat was a natural companion piece to that: just two people, opening up about the stuff that counts. I'm blown away by Steven's insight, vulnerability and strength and it was such a pleasure to chat to him and learn from him.
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Steven's live tour kicks off next month. It's currently sold out but to be alerted first with new tickets, visit https://thed…
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Jan 11, 2022
S13, Ep1 How To Fail: Brené Brown
We’re back for a brand new season and PINCH ME BECAUSE I TRULY CAN’T BELIEVE I’M WRITING THIS but…
Our first guest of 2022 is…
The one, the only…
Brené Brown.
I’m a huge admirer of Brené’s work, much of which laid the groundwork for the formation of this podcast. She has spent the past two decades researching and changing the global conversation around courage, shame, empathy and vulnerability. She is a professor at the University of Houston, the the author of five number one New York Times bestsellers, the host of the weekly podcast Unlocking Us, which averages one million listens per episode and her 2010 TED talk, ‘The Power of Vulnerability’ is one of the most-watched of all time. Her latest book, Atlas of the Heart, takes the reader on a journey through 87 emotions and experiences that define what it means to be human.
Brené joins me to talk about the failure of her first book, failure to prize consistency over intensity and her multiple failed hobbies…
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Jan 6, 2022
How To Fail: Season 13 Trailer
We're back! Season 13 launches on 12th January. Subscribe now to be the first to hear new episodes.
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Dec 26, 2021
TWIXMAS BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Clemency Burton-Hill
This one comes to you straight from my heart.
Clemmie Burton-Hill is one of my closest friends. She is also one of the most accomplished and brilliant people I know - a gifted violinist, a wonderful author, a talented actor, a peerless broadcaster, a fantastic mother, a wildly loyal friend. But in January 2020, her life changed forever.
Clemmie suffered a brain haemorrhage and a massive stroke. She underwent emergency surgery and spent 17 days in a coma. When she regained consciousness, it was to a radically different reality. Clemmie had to relearn how to walk, talk and write. She had to re-learn how to be.
No-one was sure how much of her brain she would recover. And yet, Clemmie set about defying every single medical expectation made of her. Now, almost two years later, she is miraculously herself again. Her recovery is still ongoing, but in the midst of this personal trauma she has achieved the unimaginable and written a new book. Another Year of Wonder is a follow-up to her much…
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Dec 24, 2021
How to Fail: A Christmas Message 2021
With love from me to you on Christmas Day. This might not be the Christmas you expected or wanted or felt like you deserved but you're not alone. Here's to another day passing, and to the next day being full of possibility.
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Whatever you're going through, a Samaritan will face it with you. They are there 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Call 116 123 for free or email jo@samaritans.org
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Nov 3, 2021
S12, BONUS EPISODE How to Fail: Holly Willoughby
Oh what a truly lovely bonus episode I have for you today! I'm so delighted that I get to welcome the one and only Holly Willoughby onto the podcast. As the co-presenter of ITV's This Morning, she is a combination of daytime TV icon, national best friend and highly infectious giggler (if you need a boost, just YouTube this). But she's also now a BESTSELLING AUTHOR - her book Reflections was published last week and swiftly shot to the number one slot on Amazon. And she recently launched her own lifestyle and wellness platform, Wylde Moon.
Holly joins me to talk about her failure to be present, her failure to to live by her own set of beliefs and falling into the trap of meeting other people's expectations and her failure 'to be an individual'. Along the way we discuss fame, body image and 'repackaging jealousy as possibility' (I know! It's a quote from her book! So good!). It's such a wonderful, open-hearted conversation and I'm so grateful to Holly for sharing her beautiful vulnerabil…
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Oct 20, 2021
S12, Ep8 How to Fail: Meg Mason
For the final episode of this season of How To Fail, I bring you the author of one of my favourite books of recent years. She is Meg Mason and her novel, Sorrow & Bliss, was the novel of the summer, lauded by everyone from Ann Patchett to Gillian Anderson via Olivia Wilde who was pictured reading it while on a yacht on holiday with Harry Styles. True facts.
Meg, a New Zealander who lives in Sydney, wrote a quintessentially British book that was at once utterly tender and riotously funny, about sisterly love, mental illness, the complexities of marriage, family pain and what it means to be human (complete with references to slag-heaps and a dishevelled Kate Moss). It is STUNNING and if you haven't read it yet, you must.
In the meantime, have a listen to this episode which - like Meg's writing - is poignant, humane and true. We talk about failures both creative and personal - how people telling her she had her children too young made her almost believe it, how she regrets writing an…
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Oct 13, 2021
S12, Ep7 How to Fail: Lady Hale
Well this one was quite intimidating, to be honest. My guest this week is Baroness Hale of Richmond, one of this country's finest legal minds. She was the first woman President of the supreme court, the youngest and first female commissioner to be appointed to the Law Commission and has been dubbed the Beyoncé of the legal world owing to her popularity among young law students.
But you might just know her best for her spider brooch, which she wore in 2019 while delivering a stinging ruling finding Boris Johnson’s prorogation of Parliament to be unlawful. Her memoir, Spider Woman: A Life, has just been published.
Lady Hale joins me to talk about battling sexism in law, her failures at school and academia, the loss of her father at a young age, the death of her beloved husband during Covid and her 'abject failure to knit a dishcloth aged five.' Along the way we cover, Beyonce, spiders, Ian McEwan and much, much more.
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Spider Woman: A Life is out now. You can order your copy here…
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Oct 6, 2021
S12, Ep6 How to Fail: Stanley Tucci
Today, I welcome the inimitable Stanley Tucci. His talents are legion: he's an Academy Award nominated actor whose credits include everything from The Devil Wears Prada to The Hunger Games and Julie & Julia. He's also a notable foodie, and the presenter of the Emmy-award-winning Searching for Italy and a beautiful memoir, Taste: My Life Through Food, which is published on Thursday. And, of course, he's the negroni-making Instagram sensation whose lockdown cocktail skills launched a thousand salivating online comments.
Stanley joins me to talk about his failure to swim, his self-perceived failure to direct and his failure to help his first wife, Kate, when she was dying of cancer. He is everything you would expect him to be: charming, urbane, eloquent, funny and profoundly moving. I absolutely loved recording this episode and I hope you love listening to it too. What. A. Guy.
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Taste: My Life in Food is out on Thursday. You can preorder your copy here.
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My new novel, Magpie,…
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Sep 29, 2021
S12, Ep 5 How to Fail: Ruby Tandoh
[TW: eating disorders]
Oh but how I *love* today's guest. Ruby Tandoh is the former Great British Bake Off contestant who went on to write cookery books, a manifesto for eating what you want (Eat Up), a column for the Guardian and pieces for the New Yorker, among other prestigious publications. Her new book, published next month, is called Cook As You Are and contains 100 original recipes accessible to real home cooks, no matter their age, budget, ability or background.
She joins me to talk about her failures at university (dropping out of four different degree courses and counting), her failures at cooking (no, really) and her failure to 'rise above things'. Along the way, we chat about short attention spans, spontaneity, calling people out on hypocrisy, regrets and why she keeps comparing men she doesn't like to types of ham on Twitter.
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Cook As You Are: Recipes for Real Life, Hungry Cooks and Messy Kitchens is out on 7th Oct and available to preorder here.
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My new novel, M…
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Sep 15, 2021
S12, Ep3 How to Fail: Phil Wang
Today my guest is the excellent Phil Wang, stand-up comedian and soon-to-be published author. As a comic, Wang has appeared on a host of comedy panel shows including Would I Lie To You? and 8 out of 10 Cats. During the pandemic, he became the first UK comedian to tape and release a Netflix special at a sold-out London Palladium.
His new memoir, Sidesplitter: How To Be From Two Worlds At Once examines his dual identity as the son of a white British mother and a Chinese-Malaysian father.
He joins me to talk about failed shows, failed sporting endeavours and failing to learn Mandarin. We also discuss racism, introversion, height and why we're perfectly matched tennis partners.
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Sidesplitter by Phil Wang is out on 16th September. You can preorder it here.
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My new novel, Magpie, is out now. You can order it here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. We love hearing from you. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gma…
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Sep 8, 2021
S12, Ep2 How to Fail: Jacqueline Wilson
Dame Jacqueline Wilson is the beloved children’s author of over 100 books and the creator of one of the most memorable characters of all time: Tracy Beaker. But it wasn’t until her 40s that Jacqueline became a bestseller. Now, at 75, she remains as indefatigable as ever. Her latest book, The Primrose Railway Children, a reimagining of E. Nesbit’s children’s classic, is published next week.
She joins me to talk about her failure to be practical, her failure as an actress and her failure to be healthy. In person, she's just as charmingly unforgettable as her fictional heroines. Enjoy!
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The Primrose Railway Children by Jacqueline Wilson is out on 16th September. You can preorder it here.
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My new novel, Magpie, is out now. You can order it here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. We love hearing from you. To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Jacqueline Wilson @FansofJWilson…
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Sep 2, 2021
BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Tanya Reynolds
Today, to mark the publication of my new novel Magpie, I bring you an EXTRA-SPECIAL TREAT in the form of the wonderful Tanya Reynolds.
Tanya is a brilliant actress who plays Lily in the hit Netflix show Sex Education and was recently seen on our screens as Mrs Elton in the remake of Emma, starring Anya Taylor-Joy. She's ridiculously talented, an all-round legend and also, as my tremendous good luck would have it, the audiobook narrator for Magpie - this episode even includes an exclusive chapter.
Tanya joins me to talk about her failure to get into drama school, her failure to make decisions, the life-changing art of improv and her failure to 'spend her time wisely'. Highly relatable and hilarious. Enjoy!
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If this episode whetted your appetite, you can buy the rest of Magpie on audiobook here
You can also order it in other formats here
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. We love hearing from you. To contact…
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Sep 1, 2021
S12, Ep1 How to Fail: Derren Brown
My first guest for Season 12 is mind-blowing in the truest sense of the word. Derren Brown has had a 20-year television and stage career, during which he has deployed magic, suggestion, psychology, misdirection and showmanship with extraordinary - and sometimes - controversial results. He played Russian roulette live on screen. He predicted the results of the National Lottery. He convinced law-abiding citizens to rob a bank. He's also a painter and bestselling author. All of the facets of his career have been linked by his intense curiosity about human nature. His new release, A Book of Secrets, considers the value of difficulty in our lives so, yes, he's PERFECT for How To Fail!
He joins me to talk about failed driving tests, social anxiety and what failing on stage has taught him about life. This was such a profoundly stimulating conversation - and I hope it blows your mind as much as it did mine.
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Derren's new book, A Book of Secrets, is available to order here.
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My new n…
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Jul 27, 2021
S11, BONUS EPISODE How to Fail: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
When I started this podcast, I had a list of dream guests.* At the top was Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. Her third novel, Americanah, is one of my favourite books of all time. I can remember exactly where I was when I read it. I was moved by the power of its epic sweep, the brilliance of its observations and the characters who made your heart break.
But although she's an amazing writer, Chimamanda's cultural reach goes much further than the literary world. Her TED Talks are among the most viewed of all time. Beyoncé sampled her words in Flawless. Anything she writes, whether it be fiction, essays or commentary attracts global attention.
Her latest book, Notes on Grief, is an essay examining the devastation of her father’s unexpected death in June 2020. In March 2021, there followed a second heartbreak: the death of her mother, on what would have been her father’s 89th birthday. Chimamanda joins me to talk about those terrible losses, the grief and rage it has left her with and h…
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Jul 14, 2021
S11, Ep8 How to Fail: Maggie O'Farrell
For our season finale, I bring you the glorious Maggie O'Farrell. She is one of my favourite authors, and her books include the highly acclaimed novels After You'd Gone, The Hand That First Held Mine, Instructions for a Heatwave and the bestselling memoir I Am, I Am, I Am. Her most recent work of fiction, Hamnet, imagined the untold story of Shakespeare’s son who died at the age of 11. It won the 2020 Women’s Prize.
She joins me to talk about resurrecting the untold stories of women, how to be a writer and a parent (Cyril Connolly and his 'pram in the hallway' come in for a bit of a bashing) as well as how she applies concepts of success and failure to her books. She talks about her stammer and her failure to do a PhD and we also discuss how a childhood illness changed her forever, and the various physical repercussions that she still lives with. Plus: why she always finds the back of a tapestry far more interesting than the front...
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Hamnet by Maggie O'Farrell is out now. You…
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Jul 11, 2021
BONUS EPISODE: HEERRREE'S DOLLY!
SHE'S BAAAAAACK!
To mark the third anniversary of How To Fail, I invite back the one and only Dolly Alderton.
Dolly was one of my first ever guests in the debut season of How To Fail, way back in the mists of time (by which I mean the summer of 2018). Back then, she had just published her memoir Everything I Know About Love a few months earlier. She could have had little idea of the success that was to follow: it became a bestseller, won Autobiography of the Year at the National Book Awards and was selected for Stylist magazine’s best books of the decade by remarkable woman. Dolly is now adapting the book into a BBC drama. Her first novel, Ghosts, was published last year and went straight in at Number 2 in the Sunday Times Bestseller list. It's out in paperback later this month. She was also the co-host of the hugely beloved (and sorely lamented) The High Low podcast.
In public, it might have seemed as though Dolly was cresting the wave of extraordinary success. But it didn't alwa…
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Jul 7, 2021
S11, Ep7 How to Fail: Martine Wright
Martine Wright is a survivor of the 7/7 London terrorist bombings. Sixteen years ago today, she was travelling on a Circle Line tube to Aldgate station on the morning of 7th July 2005, when a suicide bomber sitting three feet away from her set off an explosion that would change her life forever. She lost both of her legs and was in a coma for 10 days after which she underwent a year of intensive rehab and multiple surgeries. Astonishingly, Martine went on to become an international sitting volleyball player and represented the Great Britain’s women’s team at the 2012 Paralympics in London. This is her extraordinary story.
She joins me to talk about resilience, living loss, experiencing an able-bodied world as a disabled woman, fertility, grief and how she believes catastrophic life-changes can have positive outcomes.
Martine is one of the most inspiring, hopeful, strong and brilliant people I've ever had the pleasure of interviewing. You do not want to miss this episode.
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You…
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Jun 30, 2021
S11, Ep6 How to Fail: Paris Lees
[TW: sexual abuse]
Today, my guest is the absolute PEACH of a human that is Paris Lees. Paris is an award-winning journalist and a Contributing Editor for British Vogue. She was the first trans woman to present on BBC Radio 1 and Channel 4 and the first to appear on Question Time. Her recently published memoir, What It Feels Like For A Girl, is the uniquely told, semi-fictionalised story of her childhood in Nottinghamshire - which included a spell as a rent boy and an eight-month prison sentence for armed robbery - and the refuge she found in partying, music and, eventually, books.
Paris joins me to talk about everything from dating and failed relationships to missed deadlines and trans rights. Plus we discuss what it feels like to be a highly sensitive person and how this self-perceived 'failure' has actually turned into one of her biggest strengths.
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Buy Paris's memoir, What It Feels Like For A Girl, here
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My new novel, Magpie, is out on 2nd September. I'd love it if you fel…
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Jun 23, 2021
S11, Ep5 How to Fail: Christie Watson
Christie Watson is a nurse turned bestselling author who went back to frontline nursing during the Covid-19 pandemic. But if you were to call her a 'hero' she would refuse the label - and during the course of this interview, she tells me why.
Watson left school at 16 and volunteered at a charity before training to become a nurse at Great Ormond Street Hospital. She spent the next 20 years in hospitals in various disciplines and mainly in paediatric intensive care.
Alongside that, she built up a successful writing career. Her debut, Tiny Sunbirds Far Away, won the Costa First Novel Award and in 2018, she published a memoir - The Language of Kindness: A Nurse’s Story, which has been translated into 23 languages. Her most recent book, The Courage To Care, is just out in paperback.
She joins me to talk about failures in nursing, motherhood and, in an especially enlightening conversation, she tells me what happened when she thought she was having a breakdown only to be diagnosed as p…
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Jun 16, 2021
S11, Ep4 How to Fail: Guvna B
My guest today is Guvna B, the MOBO-award winning rapper, author and broadcaster. He grew up on a council estate in East London and went on to study at the University of Hertfordshire before forging a full-time career in music. He's since released 10 albums and a memoir, Unspoken, in which he examines toxic masculinity and male identity.
Guvna B - otherwise known as Isaac Borquaye - joins me to talk about the death of his father, and two of his close friends, and how he had to address his grief in order to carry on living. We discuss the power of vulnerability, fatherhood and finding 'blessings in the struggle'. We talk about faith, identity, race and inter-generational trauma. Plus we discuss failures in exams, driving tests and...erm...mobile phone storage - and why he once blew £4000 on trainers in Westfield.
Thank you Isaac, for opening up with such generosity in what turned out to be a deeply inspirational conversation.
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Unspoken by Guvna B is out now and available to buy he…
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Jun 9, 2021
S11, Ep3 How to Fail: Ed Miliband
I absolutely loved this interview. Whatever your preconceptions about politicians, please set them aside, because you're about to meet Ed Miliband: former leader of the Labour Party, current shadow business secretary, fellow podcaster and author of a new book, Go Big: How To Fix Our World.
Ed joins me to discuss his failure to win the 2015 general election, suffering from anxiety, failing to get the degree he worked so hard for and a failure to keep his late father, the noted Marxist academic Ralph Miliband, alive. We touch on his family history - both his parents escaped Nazi Germany and many of his relatives were killed in the Holocaust - and we consider whether carrying the hopes and dreams of previous generations makes him feel more duty-bound to succeed. Along the way, we discuss therapy, competitive swimming with Alastair Campbell, political optimism, the power of big ideas, bacon sandwiches, Ed-stones, Milibae, sibling rivalry (yes, I do ask him how things are with his brother…
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Jun 2, 2021
S11, Ep2 How to Fail: Jessica Ennis-Hill
Dame Jessica Ennis-Hill is an Olympic heptathlon gold medallist and a three-time world champion. This is a woman who knows what it takes to succeed at the very highest levels, and who has learned to process failure when she doesn't win. I learned so much from her insight. And she's still only 35!
We had a truly fascinating conversation about the psychology of competitiveness, the importance of loyalty and roots, how injury taught her the value of rest and how losing the 2011 World Championship to a woman who later turned out to be a drugs cheat fuelled Ennis-Hill's desire to do better.
We also talk about the specific challenges facing female athletes - from dealing with heavy periods to suppressing menstrual cycles altogether in order to compete - and how the fact that these issues weren't really talked about has now motivated Ennis-Hill to make fitness more accessible to women. Plus she talks about making the difficult decision to return to athletics after the birth of her first chi…
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May 26, 2021
S11, Ep1 How to Fail: Graham Norton
What better way to kick off a new season of interviews by interviewing one of the very best interviewers? INTIMIDATED, ME? Pahahahahaha.
We open Season 11 of How To Fail with the peerless, hilarious and warm Graham Norton. Chat show host extraordinaire, bestselling author and beloved radio presenter, he joins me to talk about his failure to become an actor, to crack America and to throw a ball (no, really). We also talk about the art of the interview, his workaholic tendencies and, in an incredibly moving exchange, his near-death experience. Plus: what he learned from being a waiter and what happens when your lifelong dream *doesn't* come true. And I ask him whether he's jealous of James Corden.
We laughed. We welled up. We chatted. What a gent he is. (Graham, that is, not James. I mean, I'm sure James is too, but...you know what I mean...ok I'm going now...byeeee!)
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Graham Norton's latest novel, Home Stretch, is out now in paperback and available to order here.
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My new novel,…
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May 12, 2021
BONUS EPISODE How to Fail: Dr Alex George
TW: discussions about suicide
For Mental Health Awareness Week, we have a very special bonus episode with Dr Alex George. A former Love Island contestant who after exiting the villa, returned to his job as an A&E doctor. Throughout the Covid-19 pandemic, he’s been hard at work on the frontline. Behind the scenes, he has had to cope with devastating personal tragedy - his younger brother, Llyr, died by suicide in July 2020. Alex’s openness about his own mental health has been a comfort for many, and in February he was appointed the UK’s Youth Mental Health Ambassador. This week marks the publication of his first book, Live Well Every Day.
Alex joins me to talk openly about everything he’s been through - from failing to get the grades for med school to getting sunburned on Love Island. We talk about mental health, resilience, fear, depression, introversion - and why he loves bath bombs. We also talk about his brother’s death at the age of 19, the guilt Alex feels at not hav…
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Apr 7, 2021
S10, BONUS EPISODE How to Fail: Adrian Dunbar
I'm almost too excited to write this but..for this extra-special bonus episode, I bring you none other than Adrian Dunbar: the man, the myth, the legend who plays Superintendent Ted Hastings in one of my favourite ever TV shows Line of Duty. If you're watching season six of Jed Mercurio's addictive police procedural, I suspect you will be obsessed with this interview (and yes, of course I ask him about 'H') but if you've never seen Line of Duty, I promise you'll still love it because Adrian is such a wonderful, thoughtful guest.
We had a really moving conversation about growing up in Northern Ireland at the height of the Troubles, the sudden death of his father from a brain haemorrhage, the impact this had on his family and what it meant to win a place at drama college in the midst of all the uncertainty. Plus what it's like to work with Vicky McClure and Martin Compston on Line of Duty, where he gets his catchphrases from and I ask him to call me 'fella' which was joyous.
That's it…
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Mar 24, 2021
S10, Ep8 How to Fail: Kazuo Ishiguro
It's the season finale, so obviously I insisted our last guest be a Nobel Prize winner and...HERE HE IS! Kazuo Ishiguro, arguably one of our greatest writers of contemporary fiction, and a very lovely man to boot. His most famous book, The Remains of the Day, was written when Ishiguro was only 35. It won the Booker Prize and was adapted into a major film starring Antony Hopkins and Emma Thompson. His other works, including Never Let Me Go and The Buried Giant, collectively earned him the Nobel Prize for Literature in 2017. Now, at the age of 66, he's back with his latest novel, Klara and the Sun, which is told through the eyes of an AI robot designed to befriend children.
He joins me to talk about observation and outsiders, imposter syndrome and self-belief, his movie script failures and his failure to grasp the importance of science. Plus, his failure to understand life outside the metropolitan bubble leading up to the events of the Brexit referendum of 2016 and the election of Trum…
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Mar 17, 2021
S10, Ep7 How to Fail: Emma Reed Turrell
On an excitement scale of 1-10 I am currently at a 15 because this week's guest...is my best friend.
As well as being my bff (arguably her most important qualification, I'm sure you'll agree) Emma Reed Turrell is also a brilliant psychotherapist and the author of what is destined to become a must-read book, Please Yourself: How to Stop People-Pleasing and Transform the Way You Live. This is the manual every single self-identifying people pleaser needs to read (and in fact, even those who don't think they are people-pleasers should read it because Emma has helpful advice for you too). The book is packed full of clinical expertise, case studies, practical guidance, intellectual rigour and humour. Plus the odd mention of me. (Well, ok, there's one). It's her first book and it truly blew my mind.
I've been wanting an excuse to get Emma on the podcast for ages because she is my life guru: a person who has been there for all my ups and downs, who has seen me at my lowest and highest ebbs…
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Mar 10, 2021
S10, Ep6 How to Fail: Jim Down
Today's episode is an important one. Jim Down is an ICU doctor on the frontline of the Covid crisis. He is a consultant in critical care and anaesthesia at University College London Hospital, running the intensive care unit at one of London’s busiest hospitals, where life and death decisions are an everyday occurrence.
Despite having spent all his adult life working in these conditions, nothing could have prepared Jim Down for Covid-19. As the pandemic descended in spring 2020, Down found himself under almost unimaginable pressure. He and his colleagues dealt with an unprecedented surge in patients, critically ill from a terrible new disease with no known cure. Down is still working at the frontline, still donning PPE every day, still under extreme pressure as the NHS continues to battle through the pandemic and keep us safe.
He joins me to talk about this, as well as how he manages his own anxiety, why lockdown works (it's worth it, everyone!) and what he's learned from this unpre…
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Mar 3, 2021
S10, Ep5 How to Fail: Dr Nicole LePera, The Holistic Psychologist
This week, Dr Nicole LePera is here to blow your mind. Better known to many as The Holistic Psychologist on Instagram, where she has over 3.4 million followers, Le Pera has gained huge popularity by breaking down complex but helpful psychotherapeutic ideas into accessible, and often life-changing, social media posts.
A trained clinical psychologist, LePera was frustrated by the separation between body and mind in some traditional therapy. Now she's put her theories into a book, How To Do The Work: a holistic approach to mental health which encourages us to look for connections between our body and mind, and empowers us to believe that sometimes we have the tools for our own healing.
She joins me to talk about failing at marriage, failing at work and family estrangement. We discuss personal boundaries, trauma bonds, how to deal with criticism (and what her response is to the criticism directed at her methods specifically), co-dependency, how to say no, epigenetics, guilt and much, muc…
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Feb 24, 2021
S10, Ep4 How to Fail: Emma Barnett
Emma Barnett is the presenter of BBC Radio 4's Woman's Hour, a gifted broadcaster whose forensic interviewing style has reduced politicians to gibbering wrecks and whose compassion and insight can move listeners to tears. She's also the author of Period: It’s About Bloody Time, a book borne out of her own experience of living with painful endometriosis which for years went undiagnosed. At the time of recording, her book was about to come out in paperback, but that's been pushed back to 8th July because, well, pandemic. Link to buy / pre-order is below!
Emma joins me to talk about the ingrained sexism that means so-called 'women's issues' are concealed by misplaced shame, as well as how her failure to get pregnant for two-and-a-half years led her to a dark place. It is one of the most honest conversations I've ever had about fertility, from someone who has truly walked that path. Plus, she admits to getting bored easily by repetitive conversations and failing to live in the moment en…
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Feb 17, 2021
S10, Ep3 How to Fail: Alexandra Burke
Alexandra Burke shot to fame as the 2008 winner of The X Factor. She became the first British female solo artist to have a million-selling single and went on to have a successful career as both a recording artist and a performer: her lead roles in the stage adaptations of The Bodyguard and Sister Act met with rave reviews.
But behind the public profile were private battles: her beloved mother was dying, she was subjected to racism in the music industry and her story was frequently misreported in the media. Alexandra joins me to talk about managing this difficult duality and what it taught her about her own strength and resilience. She tells me about never thinking she's good enough, learning how to set boundaries, losing herself in relationships, failing to put herself first and the grief of losing her mum. We also talk about how, in the wake of the Black Lives Matter protests of 2020, she chose to speak out about the racism she endured and the impact this had on her.
I'm not sure I'…
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Feb 10, 2021
S10, Ep2 How to Fail: Matt Haig
Today, I invite you to listen to one of my most-requested guests. I've lost count of the number of messages I've received begging me to get Matt Haig on the podcast, and now here he is: the man, the myth, the legend himself!
Matt is a bestselling author of both fiction and non-fiction and a mental health advocate whose admirers include everyone from Dolly Parton to the Duchess of Sussex. After surviving serious, life-threatening depression in his 20s, Matt used his experiences to form the basis of his 2015 memoir, Reasons to Stay Alive, which was a number one Sunday Times bestseller and stayed in the UK top 10 for 46 weeks. His latest novel, The Midnight Library, tells the story of Nora Seed, who, after attempting to take her own life, finds herself in a library of books which contain alternative versions of Nora’s future. It's a charming meditation on what it means to live a fulfilled life, and on the often blurry line between failure and success.
Matt joins me to talk about his f…
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Feb 3, 2021
S10, Ep1 How to Fail: Jameela Jamil
[TW: contains discussion of eating disorders, including references to calorie-counting and body dysmorphia]
We're back, baby! So much has changed hasn't it? Last year, I released a new series in the grip of a national lockdown and a global pandemic. This year...well, I'm releasing a new series in the grip of a national lockdown and a global pandemic. I hope Season 10 of How To Fail brings you some much-needed cheer in these strange times.
And WHAT a guest I have for you to kick off with. Jameela Jamil started out as an English teacher, fell into TV presenting, subsequently became an actress, starring alongside Ted Danson and Kristen Bell in The Good Place and is now well-known for her activism.
In 2018, Jameela launched I Weigh, which has grown into a radically inclusive global movement against shame and now has its own YouTube channel and podcast. Along the way, she's come in for her fair share of criticism - perhaps unsurprising when you consider her habit of calling out of medi…
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Dec 30, 2020
SPECIAL EPISODE! How to Fail: Leanne Hainsby
It's the weirdest time of the year, when all the days become a formless sludge and we start to miss getting emails. Navigating the days between Christmas and New Year can be tricky at the best of times, but in 2020 there's an extra layer of WTAF. So I knew I wanted to talk to someone motivating, but not annoying; someone who could nudge us gently into 2021, without making us feel like we weren't already good enough; someone sweet and funny who wasn't smug; someone who, in short, is as sceptical about New Year's resolutions as I am and can instead make us all feel better about who we are right now. That person is Leanne Hainsby.
Anyone who is lucky enough to own a Peloton will already know who Leanne is. Anyone who doesn't know what a Peloton is, well, it's basically a super-duper fixed exercise bike with a video screen that enables you to join live and on-demand classes given by amazing instructors. If you have never been on a Peloton and would rather chew your own feet than go to a s…
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Dec 24, 2020
How to Fail: A Christmas Message
An alternative Christmas message for anyone who needs it.
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Dec 16, 2020
A How to Fail Miniseries: Rebecca Anderton-Davies
For this four week miniseries, we've been introducing you to four 'ordinary' people with extraordinary stories as part of a one-off How To Fail miniseries in partnership with Grey Goose.
My final guest is Rebecca Anderton-Davies, a woman with a double life: a high-flying investment banker who has become a yoga phenomenon in her spare time. At the age of 27, she was hit by a van while cycling to work, breaking her collarbone and badly damaging her shoulder tissue. As part of her rehabilitation, her physiotherapist suggested she started doing a slow form of yoga. To begin with, Rebecca was, by her own admission, 'rubbish' but she soon found that the lessons she learned in failing on the mat served her well in the rest of her life.
When, a couple of years later, a doctor found blood clots on her lungs - a life-threatening condition - yoga helped her again. But her busy job meant that she didn't often have time to make it to a studio, so Rebecca started practising at home, and sharing he…
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Dec 9, 2020
A How to Fail Miniseries: Bassel Deeb
For this four week miniseries, we'll be introducing you to four 'ordinary' people with extraordinary stories as part of a one-off How To Fail miniseries in partnership with Grey Goose.
Today, my guest is Bassel Deeb. Bassel was born in Damascus, Syria. When his country descended into a brutal civil war, he was forced to flee. He came to the UK in 2013 where he applied for asylum. Bassel joins me to talk about this life-changing experience and about what it's like to have to redefine your idea of 'home'. He talks with candour about the conflict that surrounded him in Syria, and about leaving his friends and family behind. He also speaks of his gratitude for being 'one of the lucky ones' and for having been able to make a life for himself here. And he explains what these experiences have taught him about taking a breath, pausing, and understanding the beauty of a simple moment.
I first met Bassel two years ago when I went to give a corporate talk at his former employer's. I have never…
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Dec 2, 2020
A How to Fail Miniseries: Ross Barr
For this four week miniseries, we'll be introducing you to four 'ordinary' people with extraordinary stories as part of a one-off How To Fail miniseries in partnership with Grey Goose.
Today, my guest is Ross Barr. When Ross was 20, his dad died suddenly and unexpectedly, and he turned to acupuncture to help him deal with his heartbreak. After one session of treatment, he knew this was his path. Now, Ross is one of the UK's most sought-after acupuncturists, who counts the Duke and Duchess of Sussex among his clients.
He joins me to talk about what acupuncture has taught him, coping with grief, understanding balance, treating survivors of the Cambodian genocide and why what connects us is stronger than what sets us apart. But he's really funny too. So we also chat about what his mum said when she found out he was treating royalty, why we all need to be 'a bit more 1990s' about life and why his friends call him 'the Disney Prince' (he's going to hate that I mentioned this but hey ho,…
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Nov 25, 2020
A How to Fail Miniseries: Yinka Bokinni
For the next four weeks, we'll be introducing you to four 'ordinary' people with four extraordinary stories as part of a one-off How To Fail miniseries in partnership with Grey Goose.
First up: Yinka Bokinni, a radio DJ who grew up on the North Peckham Estate in South London. She was the childhood friend of Damilola Taylor, the 10-year-old schoolboy stabbed to death in a stairwell on his way back from the library in 2000. Yinka joins me to talk about how this experience shaped her, why Damilola was so much more than the 'tragic victim' the media portrayed him as and how her resilience and passion for justice has been forged as a result. She also talks about her Nigerian and Irish upbringing, her love of Judge Judy (a podcast first) and the importance of celebrating everyday moments of connection by living victoriously. Yinka is such a beacon of optimism and hope that this was a truly uplifting interview. I hope you enjoy it.
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I have a new book out! Failosophy: A Handbook For Wh…
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Nov 24, 2020
S9, BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Jamie Dornan
For our second and final bonus episode this season, I bring you the dulcet tones of actor Jamie Dornan. Most recently seen in The Fall (currently on Netflix and BBC iPlayer) playing a serial killer with an incongruously happy family life, Dornan is also well-known for starring as Christian Grey in all three of the Fifty Shades of Grey movie adaptations, which brought him to the worldwide attention of millions.
He joins me to talk about failures in acting, failures at school and a failure to sit still. We also discuss growing up in Northern Ireland at the heigh of The Troubles, male objectification, the death of his beloved mother from cancer at the age of 16 and the loss of four friends in a car crash shortly afterwards. We talk about grief, therapy and what it means to be a father. And we talk about why he walks on his tiptoes.
I think this one of my favourite ever interviews and I hope it brings you some comfort through these undoubtedly challenging times.
How To Fail will be back…
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Oct 28, 2020
S9, BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Claudia Rankine
It is such an honour to welcome the extraordinary Claudia Rankine to the podcast. She is a poet, playwright and essayist, a woman who's life's work has been devoted to the interrogation of race and white supremacy and to the discovery of what connects - and divides - us as human beings.
Her 2014 book, Citizen: An American Lyric is the only poetry book to be a New York Times bestseller in the non-fiction category. It also won the Forward Poetry Prize. Her latest work, Just Us, explores a series of real encounters with friends and strangers. Its genre-defying essays, images and poems span everything from Beyonce to airport lounges.
This was, I think, one of the most important conversations I have *ever* had about race. Being able to listen and learn from Claudia's wisdom and intellect was an unforgettable experience and I'm so glad that I get to share it with you.
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I have a new book out! Failosophy: A Handbook For When Things Go Wrong contains two-and-bit years worth of accumul…
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Oct 14, 2020
S9, Ep8 How to Fail: James Acaster
Yes, it's the SEASON FINALE - I know, I know, it comes around so quickly doesn't it? But fear not, for we have an excellent guest in the form of James Acaster: comedian, podcaster, author and music enthusiast (specifically enthusiastic for anything released in 2016, which he claims in his book, Perfect Sound Whatever, is the best year for music dot dot dot ever).
As well as being the only British stand-up to have fronted a four-part Netflix special, James co-hosts the Off Menu podcast. He joins me to talk about mental health, political correctness, relationship break-ups, dropping out of school and the importance of making mistakes without being overly critical of everything you've ever done wrong [TW: contains discussion of suicidal thoughts]. Plus the time he called a heckler a paedophile and immediately regretted it.
Thank you so much for listening to season nine - and we'll be back in the not-too distant future with a couple of exciting bonus episodes.
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I have a new book out!…
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Oct 7, 2020
S9, Ep7 How to Fail: Nadiya Hussain
[TW: contains discussion of sexual assault]
You asked - and we listened. Welcome to one of the most requested podcast guests of all time, the wonderful Nadiya Hussain. Baker, tv presenter, author and all-round good egg, Nadiya joins me to talk about her failure to enjoy life, her failure to finish university and her failure to speak out on issues she subsequently realised were important for a public figure to tackle - such as race, identity and the issues we face as a country (such a self-aware failure, that). We also discuss her recently discovered joy of not planning, her constant effort to remain in the present and the fact that she doesn't have a cleaner (her children help her clean the house every weekend...I KNOW).
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I have a new book out! Failosophy: A Handbook For When Things Go Wrong contains two-and-bit years worth of accumulated wisdom from my fantastic podcast guests and is available here
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Nadiya's new book, Nadiya Bakes, is available to order here.
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How To Fail Wi…
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Sep 30, 2020
S9, Ep6 How to Fail: Failosophy Special
***SPECIAL EPISODE KLAXON***
To mark the publication of my new book, Failosophy, I take a trip down memory lane and share my favourite moments from the How To Fail archive, featuring Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Mo Gawdat, Alain de Botton and many, many more. AND I discuss the three personal failures that many lovely listeners sent in - they're funny and insightful and moving (best have a hankie nearby, is all I'm saying).
Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to write in and to all of you for listening. I love and appreciate you more than I can say.
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Failosophy: A Handbook For When Things Go Wrong is published on 1st October and is available here
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I am doing a LIVE show at the newly Covid-secure London Palladium on 2nd October at 6.30pm UK time. It is also live-streamed online. If you'd like to buy tickets for either option, you can do so here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. We love hearing from you…
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Sep 23, 2020
S9, Ep5 How to Fail: Ovie Soko
I'VE GOT A TEXT...MESSAGE. This week's guest is Ovie Soko, a man who entered the Love Island villa in 2019 and rapidly became iconic by uttering this phrase. But he's so much more than a reality TV star: famed for his laid-back charm and wise advice, Ovie is also a professional basketball player and a soon-to-be-published author. His debut book, You Are Dope, is out next week.
Ovie joins me to talk about almost getting expelled from school, cheating on a girlfriend and being caught stealing from his mother. Along the way we discuss Black Lives Matter, and his experiences of being pulled over by police in America, Love Island, Nigerian families, faith, relationships, social media and what it means to channel your difference as a super-power.
What. A. Dude.
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PLEASE PRE-ORDER MY NEW BOOK, THANK YOU! Failosophy: A Handbook For When Things Go Wrong is available here
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To celebrate the publication of Failosophy, I am doing a LIVE show at the newly Covid-secure London Palladium. It is…
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Sep 16, 2020
S9, Ep 4 How to Fail: Ruby Wax
I've wanted to get this guest on for ages and now - hooray! - here she is: the inimitable Ruby Wax. Ruby started out as an actress at the RSC, took a side-step into comedy and had a hugely successful television career, interviewing everyone from Madonna and Imelda Marcos to the Spice Girls. But, after living with depression all her life and a series of breakdowns, she got a Masters from Oxford University in Mindfulness-based Cognitive Therapy and is now a mental health campaigner and author.
Ruby joins me to talk about mental health, mindfulness, job loss, how to deal with anxiety and comedy as a vehicle for truth. We chat about the influence of her late, dear friend Alan Rickman, the trauma of a difficult upbringing, the time she mortally embarrassed herself in front of Sir Paul McCartney and her spectacular failure at an audition for Saturday Night Live. Oh, and we talk about what happened when she interviewed the future President of the United States, Donald Trump, on his private j…
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Sep 15, 2020
S9, Ep3 How to Fail: Annie Nightingale
At the age of 80, Annie Nightingale still manages to be one of the most forward-looking and future-facing people I've ever interviewed. She is the legendary Radio 1 DJ - the first woman ever to get a job at the station and now the BBC's longest-serving presenter and a vital force in British music.
Annie joins me to talk about confronting sexism, breaking the mould, getting the best of of interviewees and what it's like to have met everyone from David Bowie to Paul McCartney to Eminem and Jim Morrison (he didn't impress her much tbf). We also touch on her convent school education, her inability to tell a lie, her failure at A-Levels and her terrible financial planning. She is, it has to be said, a total riot.
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PLEASE PRE-ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Failosophy: A Handbook For When Things Go Wrong is available here
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To celebrate the publication of Failosophy, I am doing a LIVE show at The London Palladium. It is also live-streamed online. If you'd like to buy tickets for either option, you…
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Sep 2, 2020
S9, Ep2 How to Fail: Mohsin Zaidi
Mohsin Zaidi's memoir, A Dutiful Boy, is one of the most powerful and emotive books I've read this year. It tells the story of his upbringing in a poor pocket of east London, in a devout Shia Muslim community. His family were close-knit and religiously conservative. From a young age, Mohsin knew that his sexuality was a secret he had to hide in a household where being gay was viewed as an inconceivable taboo. Despite these personal struggles, Mohsin became the first person from his comprehensive school to go to Oxford University, later becoming a leading barrister. And then he told his family the truth.
Mohsin joins me to talk about the realities of being gay and Muslim, about what it means to love your family while keeping your truest self hidden and about how he found the strength to break through the barriers surrounding him in the search for a truly authentic life.
Trust me, YOU WILL LOVE THIS EPISODE. Mohsin is so eloquent and interesting and sweet-natured and funny that you can…
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Aug 26, 2020
S9, Ep1 How to Fail: Adam Buxton
IT'S SEASON NINE AND I FEEL FINE, BABY! And we open with a humdinger - the podcasting king, comedy legend and all-round thoroughly decent bloke that is...[drum roll + X Factor announcer voice]...ADAM BUXTON.
Adam joins me to talk about misdirected perfectionism, dropping out of university, mid-life crises and what it means to be a parent after the death of your own. We talk about privilege, being sent to boarding school aged nine, whether he feels rivalry with his astonishingly successful friends (*coughs* Louis Theroux *coughs*) and about what makes a bad spoon. That's not a euphemism, by the way, we do literally talk about bad spoons.
Adam is such a lovely man and it was an honour to have him on How To Fail, especially given that his podcast always charts higher than mine, the bastard. He is so funny - listen out for the anecdote involving wrapping scaffolding in multi-coloured ribbon - and he introduced me to the brilliant concept of having a mind like a sat nav, which is to say:…
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Aug 5, 2020
S8, BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Gloria Steinem
GLORIA STEINEM. Gloria ACTUAL Steinem.
For this very special bonus episode, I had the absolute honour of interviewing one of my all-time heroes, the feminist activist, writer and icon, Gloria Steinem. And yes, I'm still pinching myself.
We talk about her failure to understand her mother, her failure to be at her father's deathbed and her failure to learn lessons quickly enough - yes, we go deep... She also talks to me about how, at the age of 86, she is joyfully outliving society's expectations of her; of how fear can often be a sign of growth (let that sink in), about how 'anger is an energy cell', about how we are 'linked not ranked', about not having children, about spending a lifetime combatting misogyny and racism and sexism and injustice, and about the counteracting forces of love and compassion and friendship which keep her going. If you've been watching the Mrs America miniseries about the battle for equality, then this is a MUST-LISTEN, even if I do say so myself.…
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Jul 22, 2020
S8, Ep8 How to Fail: Bernardine Evaristo
It is the SEASON FINALE, BABY! I know, I know - it goes so quickly doesn't it? But here we are, two months after we started season eight, with a truly phenomenal guest. Bernardine Evaristo was the first black woman to win the Booker Prize, with her stunning novel, Girl Woman Other. She joins me to talk about her failure to be an actor, her failure to drive from London to Australia (hey, it happens to the best of us) and...brilliantly...her failure to be a lesbian. Along the way, we talk about writing, motivation, race, coercive control, age, gender and the courage she found to create her own work when none was offered to her. Bernardine is the embodiment of that overused term - an inspiration - and a truly jouyous interviewee. Thank you for listening!
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If you've enjoyed this season of How To Fail, you might like to join me for a livestream event I'm doing on 2nd October to mark the launch of my new book Failosophy: A Handbook For When Things Go Wrong You can book here
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Girl Woman…
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Jul 15, 2020
S8, Ep7 How to Fail: Siena Castellon
Siena Castellon is my youngest ever guest. She's a 17-year-old activist and mentor. She is autistic, has dyslexia and dyspraxia and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. And she's just published her first book.
Her book, The Spectrum Girl's Survival Guide: How to Grow Up Awesome and Autistic, is a brilliant guide for neurodiverse girls navigating a neurotypical world. It is packed full of information and insight into many of the challenges that autistic teen girls face. There are sections on how to date, how to deal with social anxiety and sensory sensitivity and an analysis of the fact that autism is routinely underdiagnosed in girls (in Siena's words: 'we’re really good at hiding our autistic traits. In fact, we become so good at pretending to be “normal” that we convince everyone that we’re neurotypical.')
Siena joins me to talk about being bullied at school, being misunderstood by teachers and failed by a mainstream education system that seemed unable to appreciate…
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Jul 8, 2020
S8, Ep6 How to Fail: Glennon Doyle
This week, I bring you the utterly sensational Glennon Doyle. She is the author of three books, the latest of which, Untamed, is a memoir that defies easy categorisation - somewhat like the woman herself. Untamed is thrilling, original and brave. In it, Glennon dismantles our socialised preconceptions of what women should be and challenges us all to look at the boxes we're trapped in that are not of our own making. She joins me to talk about all of this, and about why women are taught to 'look outward for permission, approval and consent' when we should be looking 'inward for wisdom' (I KNOW! THIS IS GENUINELY HOW SHE SPEAKS!) But, don't worry, there's also plenty of amazing stuff in here whatever gender you are.
We also discuss her failure to have a thick skin (and how she protects herself from judgement), her failure to keep her family together (and what this taught her about love) and her failure to be fully comfortable with her own body image (despite years of trying). Every sen…
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Jul 1, 2020
S8, Ep5 How to Fail: Julia Samuel
Today's guest is someone I fell in platonic love with by reading her work. Julia Samuel is one of the country's leading psychotherapists but she is also well-known as an author. Her first book, Grief Works, was a Sunday Times bestseller and is routinely cited as one of the most helpful and compassionate books on bereavement you will ever read. Her second book, This Too Shall Pass, Stories of Change, Crisis and Hopeful Beginnings, was published just before lockdown and could not have been a more insightful guide to the uncertain times we all found ourselves in. Adwoa Aboah called it 'one of the most valuable books I've ever read', while my hero Esther Perel, said it was 'a remarkable portrayal of how we need to understand ourselves to truly heal'.
She joins me to talk about failing exams, failed jobs, her self-perceived failures as a mother and the impossibility of putting our emotions through a logical system. We also touch on imposter syndrome, quitting things you aren't good at, be…
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Jun 24, 2020
S8, Ep4 How to Fail: Scarlett Moffatt
Scarlett Moffatt was working at the checkout in Asda when she and he family got the chance to be on Channel 4's Gogglebox. She rapidly became the show's break-out star with her brilliant one-liners. Television fame followed - she co-presented with Ant and Dec, won 2016's I'm A Celebrity and now hosts the official podcast for Rupaul’s Drag Race UK. But with her overnight celebrity also came increased scrutiny and criticism.
She joins me to talk about becoming an accidental famous person and dealing with online abuse (she will now reply to trolls with the phone number for the Samaritans). Scarlett also discusses her shifting relationship with body image and her own struggles with anxiety and low self-worth.
This is a woman who has worked hard all her life - from her first job at 14, putting sweets into Pic n' Mix to being employed in sales at the Carphone Warehouse. When she went on I'm A Celebrity, she had only just managed to clear her student overdraft. With the fee she was giv…
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Jun 17, 2020
S8, Ep3 How to Fail: Matthew Syed
Matthew Syed is an acclaimed author, newspaper columnist and broadcaster. He is also, in many ways, is the father of failure. I mean that as a compliment, obviously. Through his seminal, bestselling books - Bounce, Black Box Thinking and his latest, Rebel Ideas - he has shown again and again that failure can actually be the richest seam of data acquisition.
His interest in making mistakes in order to evolve started, incongruously, with table tennis. He was the British number one in 1995 but later choked in spectacular fashion at the Sydney Olympics in 2000. The experience triggered a fascination with what it means to fall apart under pressure and why it happens.
Syed joins me to talk about all this, as well as leaving school at 15, his childhood experiences of racism, the horror of cold-calling when he ran a marketing agency, the 'terrible' early newspaper columns he wrote, the necessity for diversity of thinking, fatherhood and why we don't need to be scared of airplane turbulenc…
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Jun 10, 2020
S8, Ep2 How to Fail: Samantha Irby
*This episode was recorded before recent tragic events in America. There are links to useful Black Lives Matter resources and ways to help below*
You know when you read someone's work and feel like you'd be friends in real life, and you become basically a little obsessed and Google them to inhale all the online content that is out there about this person and their work and THEN you get to to meet them and despite thinking they couldn't possibly live up to all your overhyped expectation, they actually do? Well, ok, so that's what happened to me with Samantha Irby.
Not only is she a brilliant, hilarious and perspicacious essayist (she has published three collections, the latest of which, Wow, No Thank You, entered the New York Times bestseller list at number one) but she's a wonderful, generous and warm human being. Samantha joins me to talk about failure to complete college, her failed relationships, failing at drama class, being her mother's carer, growing up poor, using humour as a…
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Jun 3, 2020
S8, Ep1 How to Fail: Jessie Ware
*This episode was recorded before recent tragic events in America. There are links to useful Black Lives Matter resources and ways to help below*
WE'RE BAAAAAACCCCKKKK just like Backstreet, The Mack, and the toilet roll that's now in stock again in Sainsbury's. And what a guest I have for you! It is the one, the only, Jessie Ware. Not only is she one of my favourite singer-songwriters (four Brit nominations to her name, three top-ten albums and a whopping 120 million streams on Spotify for one of her most famous songs, Say You Love Me...JUST SAYIN) but she's also one of my favourite podcasters, co-hosting the brilliant Table Manners with her mother, Lennie and interviewing an array of astonishing talent over a home-cooked dinner. Their eponymous cookbook is a Sunday Times bestseller.
Part of what makes Table Manners so special is Jessie's down-to-earth manner, whip-smart sense of humour and her ability to shortcut to the real stuff (it's also the affectionate bickering with Lennie, w…
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May 20, 2020
SPECIAL EPISODE! How to Fail: Daisy Edgar-Jones on being the star of Normal People, the lockdown television hit everyone is talking about
Ok, so I said I was done with the special lockdown episodes but, forgive me, I CHANGED MY MIND. The reason for this is that I watched Normal People and thought it was the most exceptional piece of television I've seen in...well...an absolute age, and I basically hunted down Daisy Edgar-Jones like the obsessive fan I was until she agreed to be interviewed by me.
And so here it is: Daisy Edgar-Jones, who gave the performance of a lifetime as Marianne in the BBC adaptation of Sally Rooney's acclaimed novel, Normal People, joins me for the most beautiful chat about failing to go to university, feeling the need for constant validation, wanting to do things for their own artistic sake but being hamstrung by other people's approval, body image, living with anxiety (which manifests as hypochondria), feeling lost in her late teens, dealing with rejection, the weirdness of overnight fame and Connell's silver chain (in-joke there for Normal People mega-fans). We also talk allllll about Normal Pe…
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Apr 22, 2020
SPECIAL EPISODE! How to Fail: Henry Holland on business failure in the time of Covid-19
In the last of four special episodes specifically designed to help you through lockdown and Covid-19 anxiety, I welcome the fashion designer Henry Holland onto the podcast. This week, How To Fail returns to its usual format of discussing three failures but I've chosen to make this a special episode because one of Henry's failures will speak directly to a lot of people right now. It is the failure of his business, House of Holland, a failure linked to the impact of Coronavirus and which has left Henry having to call in the administrators and let beloved members of staff go. It's a failure he is still coming to terms with and I'm so grateful to him for choosing to talk about it.
We also discuss growing up in Ramsbottom, with childhood friend (and future supermodel) Agyness Deyn, and going to a school which stifled his individuality and where even the female teachers were called 'sir'. Later, Henry became a fashion journalist on teen magazines in London before he started making slogan…
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Apr 15, 2020
SPECIAL EPISODE! How To Fail: Listeners share their Coronavirus stories
For this extra-special listener episode, I asked you to get in touch with your stories. And you did not let me down. I received so many responses that when I printed them out they ran to over 100 pages of typed text. I wished I could read every single one of them out, but that would have taken quite a long time, so I did the best I could and picked a selection of the most moving, most eloquent, most reassuring, most funny, most inspiring, most heroic stories you are ever likely to hear. I burst into tears while reading your emails and messages, and I laughed a lot too. I adore you, you wonderful listeners. You are the most exceptional, thoughtful and brave audience.
In this special episode, you will hear from NHS doctors and nurses, from teachers, from vets, from struggling parents and from blended families and from those who desperately want to be parents but aren't, from those who have just broken up with lovers and from those in brand new relationships now in lockdown, from those w…
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Mar 31, 2020
SPECIAL EPISODE! How To Fail: Alain De Botton on embracing vulnerability in the age of Coronavirus
In the second of two special episodes, the renowned philosopher Alain de Botton, returns to How To Fail With Elizabeth Day to talk about how to be human and how to stay (relatively) sane in the grip of a global pandemic. We talk about the fact that, right now, it's rational to be a little demented and how we should all take lessons from our childhood and be less ashamed of bursting into tears when we really need to. He tells me about the merits of stoicism, the comfort that comes from admitting the situation we're in without sentimentalisation and what it means to find consolation in these unprecedented times.
Along the way, de Botton tackles how to deal with grief and dismantles the idea of any hierarchy of suffering - insisting that how we feel is a fact that must be taken seriously, even if there are people worse off than us. And he also tells me about the need 'to turn the light on in the room of your fears' so that the darkness no longer has the power to terrify us. This leads to…
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Mar 23, 2020
SPECIAL EPISODE! How to Fail: Mo Gawdat on how to cope with anxiety in a time of Coronavirus
Hello. I hope you're all doing ok out there. Bit of a strange time isn't it? It can feel overwhelming to be living through a global pandemic, but there are things all of us can do - small things that can have big impact. We can stay at home and save lives. We can distance socially and help the heroic health carers working on the frontline of this disease. We can spread a little positivity. We can refuse to panic buy toilet roll. And I, at least, can make podcasts so that you can listen to them and hopefully feel a little less alone.
When I was thinking of who I most wanted to hear from about how to live through this unprecedented moment in our history, there was really only one answer. It was Mo Gawdat. I originally met Mo when I interviewed him in Season 4 of the podcast. You can listen to that episode here. He told me about how he had developed a seemingly simple algorithm that enables every single person to be happy, whatever the circumstances - you can read more about that in his…
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Mar 4, 2020
S7, BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Deliciously Ella
SURPRISE! Here I am, clogging up your podcast feed again. Yes, I know I said that Frankie Bridge was the last episode in season 7, but I might have slightly not been telling you the whole truth because here I am with a brand, spanking new BONUS EPISODE all fresh and ready to be listened to by your gorgeous ears.
This week, I talk to Ella Mills, aka Deliciously Ella, the woman who launched an empire of plant-based foodstuffs, delis, bestselling cookbooks and fitness apps, all designed to make you live a healthier life. The starting point was her own illness: as a student at St Andrews University, she went in and out of hospital for months until she was diagnosed with a condition that effects the autonomic nervous system. The medicines she was prescribed met with limited success, so Ella decided to experiment with diet. The resulting blog became a phenomenon, and now, here we are.
She joins me to talk about her fear of failure and how it stopped her being honest about her illness to…
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Feb 18, 2020
S7, Ep8 How to Fail: Frankie Bridge
Frankie Bridge is probably best known as a member of one of the UK's most successful girl bands of all time, The Saturdays. But, more recently, it's as a mental health advocate that she has been making headlines. Her new memoir, Open: Why asking for help can save your life, is a brave and unflinchingly honest attempt to destigmatise the conditions that so many of us struggle with in private. Frankie lives with treatment-resistant depression. Initially, she struggled in silence but when she was hospitalised in 2011, she could no longer ignore the severity of what she was facing. Open tells the story of what happened next, of how she survived and of the decisions she makes on a daily basis to protect that survival.
It was an honour to have her on the podcast to talk about all of this, especially in the wake of the devastating news about Caroline Flack. I met Caroline a few years ago and she was really lovely: so warm and funny and kind. I - like many of you - have been so sad and so s…
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Feb 12, 2020
S7, Ep7 How to Fail: Adam Pearson
So. This podcast episode almost didn't happen because I'd forgotten to put it into my iCal (I find any diary that isn't paper so confusing, don't you?) and on the allotted day, I had a text from sound engineer Chris saying 'We're outside!'. Needless to say, I was not inside. I was half-an-hour away having breakfast with my friend Viv.
It is a testament to Adam Pearson's kindness that, when I spoke to him, harassed and sweating as I ran for the train, he didn't seem remotely put out. 'It's very on-brand to fail at turning up,' he quipped.
Anyway, I'm so glad Adam stuck around because when we did sit down to record this interview, he was utterly phenomenal. Adam is a broadcaster, actor, campaigner and documentary-maker (and also Celebrity Mastermind champion) who has lived for most of his life with the incurable genetic condition, neurofibromatosis which causes benign tumours to grow along the nerves. In his case, the tumours are mostly on his face and they have severely affected his p…
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Feb 5, 2020
S7, Ep6 How to Fail: Marian Keyes
Marian Keyes is one of those people who you think can't POSSIBLY be as lovely and talented and nice as everyone says she is. She must have a hidden dark side, I thought. Maybe she's a terrible diva who will demand bowls of blue M&Ms and want my toilet freshly re-painted and scented with vanilla before she deigns to use it?
But then you meet her and - lo and behold - she is not only as lovely as everyone says she is, but in fact EVEN NICER than that. This is a woman who has sold millions of book, who is one of the most successful and lauded Irish authors of all time, and who could quite forgivably be an egomaniac, but she's utterly fabulous. Or 'fabliss' as Keyes herself would put it.
She joins me this week to talk about writing, feminism, low self-esteem, depression, alcoholism, humour as a survival mechanism, her failure to get into journalism college, weight loss (why she knows it shouldn't be important but still can't help worrying about) and her self-perceived 'failure' to have c…
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Jan 29, 2020
S7, Ep5 How to Fail: Eniola Aluko
Eniola Aluko is a former footballer who bears the notable distinction of being one of only 11 women to play for England over 100 times and the first ever female pundit on Match of the Day. Born in Nigeria, she was raised on a Birmingham council estate, where her talent for football was obvious from a young age. At 15 she signed up for Birmingham City Ladies. Later, she played for Chelsea and Juventus, gaining a First Class law degree along the way. Later still, she was a whistleblower for racist bullying within the Football Association It was a public battle that required extraordinary reserves of strength, courage and determination.
Eni joins me to talk about racism, sexism, equal pay, psychological pressure, failing the New York bar exam twice and the very real difficulties of dating when you're a female athlete. We also discuss her gripping memoir, They Don't Teach This, which is ALL about the incredible lessons she's learned from failure and is therefore very on-brand for this…
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Jan 22, 2020
S7, Ep4 How to Fail: Tom Kerridge
This week, the podcast welcomes its first ever Michelin-starred chef. Yes...it's Tom Kerridge! And what a chef he is. He failed at school, but found his way in catering college after the death of his Dad. He climbed the ranks of the profession, working hard and partying harder. Professional success followed, at the same time as personal failure - the long hours triggered a drink problem and he became unhealthily overweight. Faced with his own mortality, he gave up alcohol and went on a fitness regime that resulted in his losing 11 stone. His transformation was so impressive that it inspired a series of bestselling books, the latest of which, Lose Weight and Get Fit, is out now.
Tom joins me to talk about his failure at education, his failure in business, his alcoholism and the associated failure to live in the moment. We talk about living to the extremes, having an addictive all-or-nothing mindset, how you can work with your spouse in a stressful industry and stay married, what it me…
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Jan 15, 2020
S7, Ep3 How to Fail: Mabel
My guest today has the middle name Alabama-Pearl, which is pretty cool but NOT QUITE AS COOL as the fact that she's a chart-topping pop-star who has racked up three top-10 hits and recently wrote one of the best Christmas songs of all time, Loneliest Time of the Year (and I say that as a die-hard Mariah fan). Plus, my guest is still only 23 years old. Revolting.
Yes, that's right, it's Mabel, a double Brit nominee and the creative brains behind the hit song Don’t Call Me Up, which was in the top 40 for four months. She was born in Malaga, went to school in Stockholm and now lives in London. Her creative lineage is quite something: Mabel's mother is Neneh Cherry, her dad Cameron McVey is a producer who has worked with Massive Attack, Portishead, All Saints and Sugababes, her uncle is Eagle-Eye Cherry and her step-grandfather is the legendary jazz musician Don Cherry. But her talent and self-possession is all her own. Mabel joins me to talk about her failure to remember lyrics, he…
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Jan 8, 2020
S7, Ep2 How to Fail: Malcolm Gladwell
**TW: contains references to police brutality against Black people**
My guest this week is Malcolm Gladwell, a man who has challenged and changed the way we think with six bestselling books including The Tipping Point, Blink and Outliers. Gladwell also hosts his own highly successful podcast, Revisionist History and is basically 98% brain. Obviously this makes him quite an intimidating prospect to interview, but luckily he was extremely nice and, as luck would have it, his new book is all about how we can best talk to strangers. It is called, appropriately enough, Talking To Strangers, and I found it a fascinating read, written in Gladwell's trademark style which combines academic research with humour, insight and journalistic expertise, all of which makes for a curiously propulsive narrative.
Malcolm really engaged with the idea of this podcast and came up with three highly thoughtful failures, including a professional low-point which caused him public embarrassment and a deeply fel…
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Jan 1, 2020
S7, Ep1 How to Fail: Andrew Scott
HAPPPPPY NEW YEAAARRRR! I hope you've woken up with a sense of rejuvenating freshness about the year ahead, but if you haven't - if you're hungover or feeling weird or sad or discombobulated or tired or like you haven't achieved enough - then fear not. You are simply caught up in this messy business of being human and that's fine. There is no need for a new year to mean a new you. The old you is great! The old you has stuff to say. And to remind you of this, I have the most wondrous of all special guests to help you usher in the first days of 2020.
Andrew Scott, as well as being an utterly lovely person, is an astonishingly talented and versatile actor. Yeah, ok, you might just have heard of him from the little-known, moderately successful television show that is Fleabag, in which he played the Hot Priest and somehow made 'KNEEL' the sexiest word in the English language, but he's also been in Bond movies and Shakespeare plays and in some of the best television shows and films of the l…
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Nov 20, 2019
S6, Ep 8 How to Fail: Jane Garvey
*SEASON FINALE KLAXON* I mean...where does the time go? A minute ago it was summer and now here I am posting the final episode of Season Six and it's a mere 24 shopping days left until Christmas. Sheesh.
But what a pleasure I have in store for you! She comes in the form of the ICONIC Jane Garvey: broadcaster extraordinaire, host of Radio 4's Woman's Hour and one-half of the brilliant podcasting duo, Fortunately...with Fi and Jane. I couldn't have asked for a better guest to bring this season to a close. (Well, I suppose I could have asked, but the point is, no-one would have been able to fulfil that request).
Jane so engaged with the premise of How To Fail that she sent not three but seven failures over email, saying she was 'struggling to narrow it down' and that it was up to me to choose which ones we talked about. We talk about her failure to listen, her tendency never to be seen to be trying too hard in case she doesn't succeed and her failure to appreciate fully what women wer…
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Nov 12, 2019
S6, BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Lemn Sissay
For this extra-special bonus episode, I'm delighted to welcome Lemn Sissay to the podcast. Lemn is a poet, author and broadcaster whose memoir, My Name Is Why, is one of the most moving I have ever read. In it, he writes about his childhood - the son of Ethiopian parents who was wrongly given up for adoption as a baby and fostered by a white, working-class family in Lancashire. At the age of 12, he was told by his adoptive family that they would be putting him in a children's home and would never contact him again. He spent the next five years in a succession of brutal institutions during which he had a mental breakdown. In these dark times, the light of his poetry began to form.
It is astonishing, then, that Lemn is such a gloriously expansive interviewee. You know when people talk about good energy? Lemn has good energy by the bucketload. There is not a trace of bitterness in his demeanour, in spite of what he has been through, and he's unafraid to be vulnerable and honest, even tho…
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Nov 6, 2019
S6, Ep7 How to Fail: Fearne Cotton
Fearne Cotton blazed the trail for podcasts like mine. When she launched Happy Place in March 2018, it went straight to the top of the iTunes chart and has seemingly stayed there ever since. It has done so much to bring discussions about mental health into the mainstream, partly because Fearne has also been honest about her own experiences with panic attacks and anxiety.
So when I started How To Fail in July 2018, I always knew Fearne would be top of my list of dream guests. A few months later, we ended up sitting next to each other at the British Podcast Awards (spoiler alert: neither of us won but embarrassingly, we both presented awards to other winners) and having a good old natter, and then I was sent to interview her for a magazine and we got on so well that we hatched the idea of doing each other's podcasts now HERE WE ARE.
What makes Fearne so special is not just her impressive broadcasting career as a TV and radio presenter, or her bestselling books or the fact that she tur…
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Oct 30, 2019
S6, Ep6 How to Fail: George Alagiah
For 15 years, George Alagiah has been a familiar face on our television screens as the presenter of the BBC's Six O'Clock News. Before that, he was one of the corporation's most respected foreign correspondents. Before that, he was born in what was then Ceylon, the only boy in a family of four sisters, and was sent to boarding school in England at the age of 12.
George joins me to talk about his self-perceived failures at fatherhood, the challenges of reporting from the front-line in times of humanitarian crisis, his nuanced relationship with racial identity and how he dealt with racist incidents in his youth. He also talks movingly about his bowel cancer diagnosis in 2014, which has seen him undergo over 40 rounds of chemotherapy and make his peace with death. What struck me most about George was his elegance: in person, but also in expression. He has no anger or bitterness or stored-up resentment, and this to me is the definition of a quiet sort of heroism.
(Obviously I also asked…
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Oct 23, 2019
S6, Ep5 How to Fail: Shirlie Kemp
Today, I welcome Shirlie Kemp to the podcast. She was an 80s icon: a backing dancer for Wham! who ACTUALLY APPEARED IN THE MUSIC VIDEO FOR 'LAST CHRISTMAS', as well as being a best friend to George Michael until his untimely death in 2016 at the age of 53. She was also one-half of the pop duo Pepsi & Shirlie and the wife of Martin Kemp, of Spandau Ballet fame (fun fact: their son, Roman, is the Capital Radio DJ).
Shirlie joins me to talk about what went on behind the scenes of fame and her memories of George, including the last conversation they ever had. She talks about her challenging council estate upbringing, feeling a failure at school and developing an eating disorder in her teens. We also discuss her long journey to self-confidence as a woman and how she and Martin coped with his brain tumour diagnosis in 1995, and what got them through those tough times as a couple. And we touch on the mean photography teacher whose criticism she will NEVER FORGET (but more fool him, because n…
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Oct 16, 2019
S6, Ep4 How to Fail: Lisa Taddeo
Lisa Taddeo is a phenomenon. Although she is too humble to recognise that description of herself. But this is a journalist and author who spent eight years - EIGHT YEARS - of her life travelling the United States and embedding herself in the lives of three 'ordinary' women in order to report back on that hitherto unexplored topic: female desire as it really is. Not as pornographic exploitation or rom-com fantasy viewed through the male gaze, but as women truly experience love and loss and expectation and sex and marriage and crushes and abuse and threesomes and motherhood and daughterhood and sisterhood and all the liminal spaces in between.
The resulting work of narrative non-fiction, Three Women, caused a sensation on its publication earlier this year. It shot simultaneously to the top of the bestseller lists in both the UK and America. Elizabeth Gilbert called it 'the best book of the year'. Dave Eggers said it was 'scorchingly original'. When I read it, I was blown away: I had nev…
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Oct 9, 2019
S6, Ep3 How to Fail: Cush Jumbo
[TW: suicide]
If you're a fan of The Good Wife or The Good Fight (and if not, why not?) you will know Cush Jumbo as Lucca Quinn, the whip-smart, ambitious lawyer who speaks with a flawless American accent. But Cush was actually born in South London, the daughter of a British mother and a Nigerian father and the second of six children. She took dance classes from the age of three, and went on to study at the Central School of Speech and Drama. An award-winning stage actress who wrote and starred in her own highly-acclaimed one-woman show, Josephine and I, she is returning to the theatre next year to play Hamlet at the Young Vic.
Way back in the mists of time (well, ok, 2012), I interviewed Cush for the Observer. I was struck then by how impressive she was, as well as being nice and funny. We stayed in touch over the years as I proudly watched her ascent from afar, and now I'm delighted to get the chance to interview her again because she is unafraid to talk honestly and beautifully ab…
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Oct 2, 2019
S6, Ep2 How to Fail: Alain De Botton
This week on How To Fail, we are doing something slightly different. I know, I know, we don't like change, but sometimes IT'S GOOD FOR US. It's especially good for us when it comes in the form of Alain de Botton, one of the most intelligent, eloquent and thoughtful people on the planet.
And because it's Alain de Botton, modern philosopher, founder of The School of Life and bestselling authors of life-changing books such as Essays In Love, I decided to allow him a little leeway. Instead of choosing personal failures, Alain wanted to talk about three philosophical 'failure concepts' and I'm so glad he did, because it led to one of the most fascinating and enlightening discussions I've ever had on the topic.
We discuss the idea that we can be good people and yet fail, and the concept (which I'm forever banging on about) that failure is the norm, and that we should find contentment in the average rather than constantly expecting the exceptional. He also has brilliant insights into why ro…
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Sep 25, 2019
S6, Ep1 How to Fail: Camilla Thurlow
We're back! Did you miss us? Go on...say you did. I'm really very, very needy.
It's such a treat for me to be opening season six with a truly fantastic guest: Camilla Thurlow. Camilla was always one of the most genuine and impressive contestants on ITV2's hit reality show, Love Island. A former bomb disposal expert who worked in life and death situations in Cambodia and Afghanistan, she came second in the 2017 series. Instead of launching a clothing line or advertising detox tummy teas, Camilla went on to use her new-found public platform to talk about issues close to her heart: namely, the immigration crisis and mental health. Her first trip after Love Island was to a refugee camp with the contestant she coupled up with, Jamie Jewitt (oh, and by the way, they are still together).
Set aside any preconceptions you might have about reality TV and listen to the wisdom this extraordinary woman imparts about love, loss and human connection. We talk about her periods of extreme anxiety and…
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Aug 21, 2019
S5 BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Philippa Perry and Sadie Jones
A live recording of a one-off How To Fail With Elizabeth Day special with authors Philippa Perry (The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read) and Sadie Jones (The Snakes) about How To Fail...At Families.
Recorded in front of a live audience at Foyle's bookshop on Charing Cross Road in London.
This episode is sponsored by Penguin Life, which publishes books by experts who share a passion for living well.
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Philippa Perry's The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read is available to order here.
Sadie Jones's The Snakes is available to order here.
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I am thrilled to be taking How To Fail on tour around the UK in October, sharing my failure manifesto with the help of some very special guests. These events are not recorded as podcasts so the only way to be there is to book tickets via www.faneproductions.com/howtofail
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The Sunday Times Top 5 bestselling book of the podcast, How To Fail: Everything I've Ever Learned From Things Going Wrong by Elizabeth Day, is out now and is availabl…
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Aug 14, 2019
S5, Ep8 How to Fail: Jess Phillips
Well, old friend, here we are again. The end of another season. Where does the time go?
I saved this guest for the finale because she's bloody spectacular. Jess Phillips is the Labour MP for Birmingham Yardley, a campaigner on women's rights, an outspoken critic of Brexit, anti-semitism and the politics of the hard-left, and the author of an acclaimed book, Everywoman: One Woman's Truth About Speaking The Truth.
She joins me to talk about coping with failure in politics, living with daily death threats and how she stays sane by prioritising her female friends. She talks about the failure in contraception (!) that resulted in her eldest son, her failure to get on the Home Office Fast Track scheme and, in an extremely moving admission, her self-perceived failure to fix her brother's drug addiction.
This makes it sound pretty heavy, but Jess is so naturally funny and such a self-deprecating force of nature, that I promise you this interview will leave you feeling energised and quite po…
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Aug 7, 2019
S5, Ep7 How to Fail: Meera Syal
This week, I welcome the multi-talented Meera Syal to the podcast: actor, comedian, playwright, novelist, producer and, most notably, sister-of-my-friend-Rajeev. Meera first came to prominence when she co-wrote and starred in the award-winning BBC comedy series Goodness Gracious Me and was Bafta-nominated for her later role in The Kumars at Number 42. She, along with her husband Sanjeev Bhaskar, almost single-handedly reinvented British-Asian comedy, taking it from the stereotypical and lazy racist tropes of old and bringing it brilliantly into the mainstream (I mean, who can forget the hilarious 'Going for an English' sketch? If you haven't seen it, YouTube it now).
Meera joins me to talk about failing at maths (and having a bigoted teacher), failing to live up to her parents' expectations of her, failing at auditions (and hating them), failing to raise her second child how she wanted and instead getting obsessed with a rigid regime rather than following her own maternal instincts.…
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Jul 31, 2019
S5, Ep6 How to Fail: Samin Nosrat
Oh, Samin Nosrat! Where do I start? With her ebullient personality and wildly infectious laugh? With her four-part Netflix show, Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat where she travels the world eating freshly baked focaccia and Japanese seaweed? Or with the award-winning, bestselling cookbook of the same name, that revolutionised the way we thought about food?
I don't know where to start. So let me just tell you that she is one of the bubbliest, most open and generous interviewees I've ever had the pleasure of meeting. She joins me to talks about growing up in San Diego, the child of Iranian parents, who was 'the only brown kid' in her school, and what this sense of outsidership taught her. She talks about overnight fame, and the weirdness that comes with that, as well as failing to write, what happens when your business fails and the one memorable time she burned the sauce for a dinner she was cooking for Hillary Clinton. Oh, and the story of how she got the description of osmosis wrong in the scie…
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Jul 24, 2019
S5, Ep5 How to Fail: Dame Kelly Holmes
I'm so delighted to welcome my first ever OLYMPIC ATHLETE onto the podcast this week. And not just any Olympic athlete, but double-gold medal winner, Kelly Holmes, who also just so happens to be my first DAME on How To Fail too.
Dame Kelly joins me to talk about how her single mother was pressurised to give Kelly up for adoption as a baby and how she refused to do so, teaching her daughter about what it is to be truly strong. We also discuss Kelly's 'failure' at school and how she joined the army at 16 but then failed her first Physical Training Instructor selection (I mean, who would fail Kelly Holmes? Come on, now. Have you seen the size of her biceps?) She also talks openly about coming second in the 1995 World Championships because of her spiralling anxiety and discusses her ongoing mental health issues, including her diagnosis with clinical depression, her grief over her mother's death and [TW] her experiences of self-harm.
For me, Dame Kelly epitomises the kind of empowerment t…
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Jul 17, 2019
S5, Ep4 How to Fail: Francesca Segal
This week, my guest is the writer Francesca Segal whose recently published memoir, Mother Ship, details the birth of her twin daughters 10 weeks prematurely. Her first failure is, in Segal's own words, her failure 'to stay pregnant' and the feeling of shame that came from not having managed to provide the requisite 40-week gestation period. 'I felt I had failed at my first ever task of motherhood,' she explains. 'That my body could not be a safe space for them felt a spectacular failure.'
She and her husband, Gabriel, were pitched into a nightmarish situation where they did not know whether their baby girls would survive. When they were born they weighed only 2lbs each. The girls could not do anything on their own and they suffered harrowing, life-threatening infections. Segal joins me to discuss what happened next.
Even if you are not one of the 100,000 women in the UK who, every year, give birth to premature babies and even if, like me, you are not a parent at all, I promise that y…
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Jul 10, 2019
S5, Ep3 How to Fail: Emeli Sandé
This week, I chat to the chart-topping singer Emeli Sandé about life, love, fame...and all the nitty gritty bits in between. Emeli has sold over 19 million singles, won four Brit Awards and is about to return after a three-year break with her hotly anticipated third album, Real Life. Her rise to fame was rapid and overwhelming. Celebrity, she says, took some time to get used to.
She joins me to talk about her body image and the long journey to self-acceptance in an industry that frequently made her feel like she was never 'enough'. She talks about letting go of the need to be perfect, and embracing failure. Plus we discuss her visit to Zambia to reconnect with her family there, and what impact that had on her. Emeli also opens up for the first time about the breakdown of her marriage, to a man she had been with from the age of 17, and the feeling of shame she had about admitting she was getting divorced before being forced to confront herself as she really was.
Emeli speaks as powe…
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Jul 3, 2019
S5, Ep2 How To Fail: FLEABAG IS BACK
Yes. That's right. Phoebe Waller-Bridge is back.
One year on from her debut appearance on How To Fail With Elizabeth Day, my first ever guest returns to talk about the craziness of her last 12 months, during which she has written and starred in Fleabag 2 (described as a televisual masterpiece by...well...almost everyone), made Killing Eve (described as a televisual masterpiece by...well...almost everyone) and been brought in by the James Bond producers to work her magic on the franchise.
It's a year that, from the outside, has seemed to many of us to be the epitome of success. But what failures lie underneath the surface? What about those private moments of vulnerability and self-doubt we are so rarely privy to?
Phoebe joins me to talk about three failures from the past year, including her failure to connect with her family, her failure to speak up for herself and her failure to Marie Kondo her bedroom. Along the way, we discuss what makes the perfect water bottle, filming THAT fina…
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Jun 26, 2019
S5, Ep1 How to Fail: Nigel Slater
We’re BAAACK! As House of Pain once rapped in their immortal hit Jump Around, ‘Just like the Prodigal Son I’ve returned’. Yes, here we are for Season 5 of How To Fail With Elizabeth Day: eight sparkling new episodes featuring eight marvellous guests.
And for our opening episode, I could not be happier to welcome the legendary Nigel Slater to the podcast. The bestselling and beloved cookery writer, whose books have adorned every kitchen worth its (Maldon) salt for decades, joins me to talk about his failure to be a proper chef, his fear that he let his father down and his failure to be a good friend. We also talk about sexuality, children, neatness, ceramics and whether or not he believes in an afterlife. Nigel was an utter joy from beginning to end and arrived in my flat for the recording bearing a bunch of flowers he had picked from his garden and a packet of green tea so delicious I promptly devoured it and had to order a massive packet of it online.
Thank you Nigel, for be…
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May 22, 2019
S4, Ep8 How to Fail: Jamie Laing
'And now, the end is near / And so I face the final curtain...'
Yes, it's the SEASON FINALE! I know, I know: it's gone so fast hasn't it? What's that they say about time flying when you're having fun calling your brain Becky? (That's a podcast in-joke, peeps, don't panic if you're a new subscriber and you haven't got a clue what I'm on about, but do check out my episode with Mo Gawdat, S4, Ep4).
Anyway, don't be too sad because I have one solid-gold, cast-iron, brilliant guest for you to usher out this season. Step forward, Jamie Laing. Some of you might know him from E4's structured reality show, Made In Chelsea. Some of you might not watch reality television and believe it to be ushering in the end of days. But I implore you, even if you have no interest in the show and even if you've got preconceptions of who Jamie is, to give this episode a listen. He is such an sincere, funny, generous and self-aware person and so willing to talk openly about the times in his life when things di…
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May 15, 2019
S4, Ep7 How to Fail: Nesrine Malik
This week on the podcast, I'm delighted to welcome the brilliant Nesrine Malik, a British-Sudanese writer and newspaper columnist who has recently been longlisted for the prestigious Orwell Prize and whose forthcoming book, We Need New Stories, is a riveting assault on our tired old ideologies. (She's also really funny, by the way.)
Nesrine joins me to talk about the not-so-terrible-yet-somehow-devastating shame of not getting the A-grade she was predicted in her GCSE English (a failure so personal, she has never told anyone about it), why she's never grown out of 'mommy and daddy issues' and why she finds it difficult to put down roots anywhere. Along the way, we talk about the shock of sudden death, going to school against the backdrop of a military coup and when it's obvious someone has cooked Ottolenghi.
I adore this woman and I know that after 45 minutes in her intelligent, inquiring company, you will too.
We Need New Stories by Nesrine Malik is available to pre-order here…
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May 8, 2019
S4, Ep6 How to Fail: Andy McNab
You could say that my guest this week became famous because of failure. Andy McNab led the Bravo Two Zero SAS mission during the first Gulf War but his team was compromised soon after they were dropped into Iraq in 1991. This was the most horrific kind of failure. It resulted in the deaths of three of the squad, a cat-and-mouse chase across the desert and McNab's eventual capture. He withstood six weeks of torture and imprisonment, later turning his harrowing experiences into the bestselling book, Bravo Two Zero. He was also awarded the Distinguished Conduct Medal for his courage behind enemy lines. In 2017, he was awarded a CBE.
But this SAS hero did not have the most auspicious start in life: abandoned as a baby in a carrier bag on the steps of a London hospital, he was brought up by adoptive parents on a Peckham council estate and dropped out of school as a teenager, barely able to read or write. He fell into a life of petty crime. After an arrest for burglary at the age of 16 h…
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May 1, 2019
S4, Ep5 How to Fail: Charly Cox
I have my FIRST POET on the podcast this week - and my, what a poet. Charly Cox is not only a beautiful soul but a beautiful chronicler of what it is to be human. Her first collection, She Must Be Mad, became the bestselling poetry debut of 2018 and Cox was named by Elle magazine as one of their 20 ‘power players’ of the year.
Although still only 23, she's accumulated an astonishing store of wisdom and I was so, so happy to have her on the podcast because what Charly has to say is deeply important for anyone struggling with how to value themselves for who and what they are rather than how they aspire to be perceived. She's been dubbed an Instagram poet for the millennial generation, but I think her work has relevance for all ages.
We spoke about anxiety, depression and her diagnosis with PTSD and Bipolar II disorder. We also discussed dropping out of school and failing to find lasting romantic love (and her fear that she is ultimately unloveable. AS IF, CHARLY). And we chat abou…
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Apr 24, 2019
S4, Ep4 How to Fail: Mo Gawdat
Just occasionally in life, you meet someone who changes your way of thinking about the world. The shift might be subtle or it might be seismic, but afterwards, you are never quite the same again.
This is what happened to me when my path crossed with that of Mo Gawdat who spoke to me about what it is to live a contented life in a way that had an immediate and practical impact on my outlook. Gawdat is the former chief business officer at Google X (Google's so-called 'moonshot factory' responsible for off-the-wall ideas such as self-driving cars and a balloon-powered internet) but for a long time in his life, despite having professional, personal and material success, he realised he wasn't happy. So he set about solving this problem by applying his scientific research skills to the issue: how can one individual be happy?
After 12 years, he developed an algorithm for happiness, eventually arriving at an equation which states simply that happiness is greater than, or equal to, your percep…
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Apr 17, 2019
S4, Ep3 How to Fail: Tracey Thorn
My guest this week is the fantastic Tracey Thorn, who I basically grew up listening to. She was one-half of Everything But The Girl, guest vocalist on Massive Attack's phenomenal Protection album and lately has launched her own solo career alongside writing three critically acclaimed memoirs, the latest of which, Another Planet: A Teenager in Suburbia has won rave plaudits from Julie Burchill, David Nicholls and Dolly Alderton, to name but a few.
Tracey joins me to talk about failing to get into the university of her choice (but meeting her husband as a consequence so...y'know...swings and roundabouts), being an utterly terrible driver, as well as living with stage fright and bouts of serious anxiety that have shaped much of her life. Our chat also takes in the jostle between career and motherhood (three kids, including twins), the difficulty of understanding our own parents, the experience of ageing as a woman and why she'd never, ever consider growing her hair long.
I'm so grateful…
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Apr 10, 2019
S4, Ep2 How to Fail: John Crace
My guest this week is John Crace, one of our foremost journalists and critics. Probably best known for his role at the Guardian as parliamentary sketch-writer (it was he who famously coined the term ‘Maybot’ to describe our besieged Prime Minister’s rather…um…mechanical response to crisis) and as the author of the brilliant Digested Read column, which takes the book of the moment and distils it into a hysterically funny parody.
John joins me to talk about being a heroin addict for 10 years. He describes the chaos and constant sense of failure that plagued him throughout his period of addiction with such candour and bravery that it moved me to tears halfway through the interview. There’s a school of thought that says interviewers shouldn’t show emotion, but I’m not sure this is always right.
John spoke about heroin, about how he failed to have ‘any sort of career until my mid-30s’, about living his life on the verge of a panic attack and sometimes struggling to get…
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Apr 3, 2019
S4, Ep1 How to Fail: Vicky McClure
We’re baaaaaack! And to celebrate our fourth season, please welcome the one, the only, VICKY MCCLURE.
You’re in for a treat with this one. Vicky is not only one of my favourite actresses but also one of my favourite people, as genuine as she is talented, and a total delight to interview. She’s probably most famous for her role as police officer Kate Fleming in Line of Duty, which kicked off again in spectacular style on Sunday night (did you watch the first episode? Could you follow what was going on with the UCO in the OCG who needed to get out ASAP? And what about that twist, eh?). Before that, McClure was Lol in Shane Meadows’s film and Channel 4 spin-off series, This Is England, a sinister maternity leave cover in The Replacement, a campaigning parent in Mother’s Day and a tabloid reporter in Broadchurch. Oh, and she’s won a Bafta, obvs.
McClure joins me to talk about failed auditions, failing to work hard enough at school, failed relationships, failure to be spontane…
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Feb 27, 2019
S3, Ep9 How to Fail: Haemin Sunim
Sniff. Sob. Wail and gnashing of teeth. Yes, it’s the SEASON THREE FINALE already - how did that happen? For our final episode in this series, I had the great privilege of talking to Haemin Sunim, one of the most influential Zen Buddhist teachers in the world.
He is a Korean ‘super-monk’ - so-called because he has over one million followers on Twitter and because his books have become instant global bestsellers. His latest, Love For Imperfect Things, is a guide to self-acceptance in which Haemin beautifully explores the idea that it is only by exercising compassion for our own vulnerabilities that we can pursue truly meaningful relationships with others. I read it in that fallow period between Christmas and New Year and it was a wonderful way to set my intentions for 2019. So much of what Haemin says chimes with the themes of this podcast, especially the concept that failure is a lesson, not a wholesale definition of self. ‘Life teaches us through errors,’ he writes. ‘When…
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Feb 22, 2019
S3 BONUS EPISODE How to Fail: Kristen Roupenian
Ahead of next week's season finale, I offer you, my wonderful listeners, a whole new BONUS EPISODE.
I know, I'm too good to you, I really am.
No, but honestly, thank you so much for your continued support - for all those lovely messages, ratings and reviews. I appreciate it so, so much. Here, by way of a thank you is the amazing Kristen Roupenian, author of the viral short story sensation Cat Person, and an all-round brilliant woman who has such interesting things to say about failure.
This episode was recorded earlier this month in front of a live audience at Foyle's Bookshop in London as part of Kristen's UK tour to promote her newly published collection of short stories, You Know You Want This which has ALREADY been optioned for adaptation by HBO.
In this episode, we talk about how Kristen dealt with her unexpected and overnight fame and what it's like to be confronted by the forceful opinions of strangers when all you've done is written a short story. We also talk about her fai…
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Feb 20, 2019
S3, Ep8 How to Fail: Pandora Sykes
This week I get to interview one of my favourite fellow podcasters: Pandora Sykes is a journalist, co-host of The High Low and all-round woman of impeccable taste (I mean, she must be to have agreed to come on How To Fail, right?)
Sykes is also a contributing editor at Man Repeller and Elle magazine and writes regularly for other publications. Her High Low co-host, Dolly Alderton, is a former How To Fail guest and - fun fact - Dolly's episode is the most downloaded OF ALL TIME.
I'm so happy Pandora agreed to come on the podcast and to talk eloquently and insightfully about not fitting in with friends at school, being fired from an internship in her 20s and 'failing to harness/ contain my brain after having a baby' even though, on the surface, her life seemed to be picture-perfect. Her words will carry so much resonance for so many of us and I loved doing this interview (partly because I got to nose around Pandora's beautiful house and to meet her mother who was as terrific as you…
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Feb 13, 2019
S3, Ep7 How to Fail: Sharmaine Lovegrove
This week on How To Fail With Elizabeth Day, my guest is the brilliant Sharmaine Lovegrove. Sharmaine is a champion of stories. As a publisher, she heads up her own imprint, Dialogue Books, at Little, Brown and has been instrumental in bringing more diverse voices into print.
But Sharmaine is also one of the most dynamic and inspiring women I've ever had the privilege of meeting. This is a woman who survived a challenging childhood and ended up living on the streets while studying for her A-Levels. This is a woman who, through sheer force of will, began selling second-hand books under the arches of Waterloo Bridge before rising through the ranks to head up her own publishing imprint. This is a woman who, despite the myriad obstacles she faced along the way, set up the first English language bookshop in Berlin and became literary editor of Elle magazine. This is a woman who says, quite candidly, that books saved her life. We talk about failure to be a child, failure to conform and fa…
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Feb 6, 2019
S3, Ep6 How to Fail: James O'Brien
Today's guest is quite possibly one of the most intimidating people to interview given his own reputation as a fearsome interrogator. But fine, I'll give it a go. James O'Brien is an LBC radio presenter who hosts a daily phone-in discussion show which attracts a million listeners a week. Clips of him dismantling the ignorance and prejudice of politicians, bigots and racists with his customary cool, hard logic have gone viral on more than one occasion.
His first book, How To Be Right In A World Gone Wrong shot into the Sunday Times top 10 bestseller list last year and tackles everything from Islam to feminism via Brexit and Donald Trump. It is a brilliant and entertaining read and in it, O'Brien is not afraid to admit when he has been wrong (an infrequent occurrence, admittedly).
He joins me to talk about failing at Physics GCSE, being adopted, going to a posh boarding school (and being expelled), how he got turned down by every single graduate traineeship on Fleet Street and ended…
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Jan 30, 2019
S3, Ep 5 How to Fail: Raven Smith
This week my guest is Raven Smith who, as well as having one of the best names dot dot dot EVER is also the funniest man on Instagram (it's true, don't @ me). Smith is a columnist for British Vogue, a guest lecturer at Central Saint Martins and is currently working on his first book: Raven Smith’s Trivial Pursuits, a guide to modern life which covers everything from Ikea meatballs to Ant & Dec and which promises to be just as funny and irreverent as the man himself.
We talk about Smith's self-professed 'failure to be straight' at school and what it was like growing up the mixed race only child of a single mother in an English seaside town (he was REALLY TALL too). We also discuss his failure to graduate, the absence of his father in his life, and Smith's failure at marriage, even though he's not divorced. As Smith put it to me in an email before we recorded the interview: 'Marriage is a concoction of failures (and successes). I relentlessly fuck it up.' I think there's somethin…
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Jan 23, 2019
S3, Ep4 How to Fail: Deborah Frances-White
My guest this week is Deborah Frances-White: an award-winning stand-up comedian, author and quite possibly the defining feminist of our generation. You'll probably know her from her hit podcast, The Guilty Feminist, or from her book of the same name and if you don't then WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING, WHERE?
Deborah joins me to talk about failure at improvisation, failure to be a biological mother and how to rebuild your life after leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses. Along the way, we discuss her adoption, the Syrian refugee who lives in her house and why learning to be joyful about miserable failure could actually be the key to long-term happiness. Deborah is such an impressive and clever woman and every time I hear her speak, I learn something unbelievably helpful and new. This occasion was no exception. My favourite bit is where we talk about dating as a data-gathering exercise. Enjoy!
How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Ch…
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Jan 16, 2019
S3; Ep3 How to Fail: Jonny Benjamin
Ok, so full disclosure: I cried during this interview. You will quite possibly cry too. You will quite possibly need a box of tissues next to you as you listen. And you will quite possibly leave feeling enlightened and uplifted by the magical, gorgeous man that is Jonny Benjamin, MBE.
Jonny is a mental health campaigner and someone with a truly extraordinary story to tell. In 2008, Jonny was 20 and standing on the edge of Waterloo Bridge about to jump. A passing stranger noticed his distress and stopped to talk to him. It was a momentary decision that saved Jonny’s life.
We talk about his journey to track that stranger down and about what Jonny has learned about himself along the way. We also talk about Jonny's diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder and his experiences of living with 'The Truman delusion' (so-called because the person believes that their lives are staged reality shows being filmed on camera). We talk about mental health in the workplace and being open about our fa…
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Jan 9, 2019
S3, Ep2 How to Fail: Chris Patten
This week, my guest is the former politician Chris Patten. It's almost easier to list the high-powered offices of state he hasn't occupied than the ones he has. Patten was the 28th governor of Hong Kong, the former Chairman of the BBC, the current Chancellor of Oxford University. For 13 years, he was the Conservative MP for Bath before losing his seat in the 1992 election - one of the incidences of failure he discusses on this episode.
At 74, Patten has published seven books, gained a peerage, fathered three children and has eight grandchildren. You might not think he knows much about failure, but in this revealing and unexpectedly moving interview, he talks about what it's like to lose a seat and have your life changed overnight, as well as how he coped with the aftermath of his tenure at the BBC (where he presided over the Jimmy Savile scandal). We also discuss his faith, his love for his wife (and his wish that he had married her earlier), his natural inclination towards gloomine…
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Jan 2, 2019
S3, Ep1 How to Fail: Lily Allen
Haaaappy New Year! We're back with a whole new season and we open with a bona fide musical superstar: Lily Allen.
A singer, songwriter, the recipient of multiple awards, Lily's songs such as Smile and The Fear are observationally crafted with honesty and irreverent wit. In 2018, she was nominated for a Mercury Prize for her (brilliant) fourth album, No Shame, and published her memoir, My Thoughts Exactly, which was a Sunday Times Number 1 bestseller. In it, she writes unflinchingly about feminism, fame and family dysfunction. Oh, and shagging Liam Gallagher in an airplane toilet.
She joins How To Fail With Elizabeth Day to talk about failing to be famous, failing to report a sexual assault, body image, children, marital breakdown, drugs and alcohol, songwriting and why, one day, she might just enter politics.
I am SO EXCITED to have Lily on the podcast. It's so rare that someone this famous is also this honest and it's a real treat. I hope you enjoy listening.
How To Fail Wit…
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Nov 22, 2018
How to Fail: End of Season Two
So here we are at the end of SEASON TWO of How To Fail With Elizabeth Day, 16 wonderful interviews (and untold numbers of pots of babaganoush) later. In order to mark this momentous occasion, I speak to the legend behind the microphone, the one and only Chris Sharp, producer extraordinaire. We chat about our favourite moments of the podcast so far and discuss the most memorable building work we've had to contend with along the way (it's a nightmare for the sound quality, apparently). Ironically, this takes place just as building work is being done in the flat above mine, so you get to hear an unexplained thumping sound about three-quarters of the way through. You're welcome.
Thank you so, so much for listening, rating, reviewing and subscribing. We'll be back in the New Year with eight new brilliant guests. Until then, remember what Truman Capote said: 'Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavour.'
How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, pr…
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Nov 21, 2018
S2, Ep8 How to Fail: David Baddiel
For the season two finale of How To Fail With Elizabeth Day, I speak to David Baddiel: comedian, author and co-writer of the best unofficial football anthem of all time (Three Lions, people). It was an interview that almost didn't happen because of his FAILURE to find a parking space near my flat. But we ended up piling into his Audi and driving to his house instead, so it all worked out in the end.
We discuss a horrendous corporate gig that almost put Baddiel off comedy altogether [warning: contains big swearing], his self-perceived failure to be taken seriously as a literary novelist, his overwhelming compunction to tell the truth, how he deals with internet trolls and hecklers and his failure to score a penalty in a Comic Relief charity football match.
Along the way, we talk about depression, anxiety, his father's dementia, Baddiel's ambiguous relationship with fame and why he might have been a premiership player, if only his childhood trainers had had velcro fastenings.
How To…
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Nov 14, 2018
S2, Ep7 How to Fail: Tara Westover
This week, I bring you a truly incredible woman. Her name is Tara Westover. She wrote a memoir called Educated, which is quite simply one of the best books I have ever read: profound, moving, unerringly original. It tells the story of Westover's upbringing, born the seventh child of Mormon survivalist parents who didn't believe in public schooling or mainstream medicine. It wasn't until she was 17 that Westover decided to educate herself - with astonishing results.
We talk about what it's like to love your family but to be estranged from them, and how the two ideas can co-exist. We also discuss how on earth someone teaches themselves algebra ('Yeah,' says Westover, 'that wasn't fun') and what it was like to refuse any pain medication despite having a dental abscess. Her failures include flunking tests, finding it difficult to make friends, her failure to believe in her family's religion even though she wanted to and her failure to make her relationship with her parents work. She also…
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Nov 7, 2018
S2, Ep6 How to Fail: Farrah Storr
Farrah Storr, the award-winning editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan, is this week's guest on How To Fail With Elizabeth Day and I'm so thrilled to have her on as have basically been stalking her on Instagram for years. In person, she does not disappoint.
We talk about the curse of perfectionism, the notion of having-it-all (ish) and Farrah's decision to be a child-free woman. We also cover her failures as a child carol singer (and why she still can't face doing karaoke because of it), being rejected from the university of her dreams, disordered eating, failing at a job she'd wanted for ages and failing at a blind date with the man who later became her husband. Plus, we discuss her new book, The Discomfort Zone, and explore how doing what scares you can sometimes be the pathway to success. And we talk about Farrah growing up in Manchester, the half-Pakistani daughter of the local green-grocer who was desperate to 'blend in' and her creepy habit of shaving the heads of her Barbie dolls…
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Oct 31, 2018
S2, Ep5 How to Fail: Alastair Campbell
This week How To Fail With Elizabeth Day welcomes Alastair Campbell to the confessional booth. The former spin doctor to Tony Blair (and inspiration for the character of foul-mouthed Malcolm Tucker in The Thick Of It) talks movingly about his mental health breakdown in 1986, and how that changed the course of his life. He also discusses living with depression, admitting to an alcohol problem, almost crying on live TV and playing the bagpipes (not all at the same time). Along the way, we talk about Brexit, Iraq, the dodgy dossier, the impact his workaholism has had on his personal life and whether he thinks New Labour was a failure or not.
Campbell is a beautifully open interviewee with some deeply candid and helpful things to say about coming back from failure and operating at the highest level of politics. It was a privilege to interview him, and somewhat surreal that he came to my flat and drank tea from my mug while I did so.
How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizab…
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Oct 24, 2018
S2, Ep4 How to Fail: Otegha Uwagba
This week my guest is writer, podcaster and all-round megawatt woman, Otegha Uwagba. Otegha joins me to talk about her failures at getting a job, dealing with sexism at work, living with depression and why she just can't seem to help being petty on Twitter (her words). We also discuss racism and how she handles daily micro-aggressions: 'I’m so conscious to be overly polite if I encounter a sort of older white person lest they then leave with a bad impression of black people generally,' Otegha says. 'I’m constantly having to code switch.' Along the way, we cover myriad other subjects including her briliant best-selling career guide for creative women, Little Black Book and why she resolutely refuses to wear florals.
How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Chris Sharp and sponsored by 4th Estate Books
Otegha's brilliant podcast for working women In Good Company features practical advice, fresh ideas and inspirational interviews.
Littl…
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Oct 17, 2018
S2, Ep3 How to Fail: James Frey
This week on How To Fail With Elizabeth Day, we're joined by the author James Frey who also just so happens to be my first American guest (hello, USA! I heart you!). Frey has written four critically acclaimed novels, and his fifth - Katerina, a sweeping love story set between 2018 Los Angeles and 1992 Paris - has just been published.
But he's probably as well known for his notoriety as his talent. In 2003, Frey published A Million Little Pieces, a memoir of his criminal past and addiction to crack cocaine. An instant bestseller, it was picked by Oprah Winfrey for her influential book club. But when it was subsequently shown that Frey had fabricated large portions, Oprah brought him back on her show to give him an exceptionally public dressing down that made headines around the world.
This is a man who has been a literary rock-star and a literary pariah; someone who has experienced public failure on a level most of us couldn't even begin to comprehend. He joins me to discuss what tha…
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Oct 10, 2018
S2, Ep2 How to Fail: Mishal Husain
The wonderful Mishal Husain joins How To Fail With Elizabeth Day this week, which I'm very excited about because she's basically my long-time woman crush.
Husain, who has been presenting Radio 4’s flagship Today programme since 2013 and is also one of our most recognisable and respected television broadcasters, joins me to talk about failing at university admissions, failing to get what she thought was her dream job, failing to ask the right questions in interviews and beating herself up about it afterwards. Along the way, we discuss racism, the impossibility of women 'having it all', the unhelpful narrative of 'the superwoman', her first book, The Skills, the gender pay gap and why she feels she's only ever as good as her last broadcast.
WARNING: This episode contains evidence of Elizabeth attempting to speak dodgy GCSE Russian.
How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Chris Sharp and sponsored by 4th Estate Books
The Skills by Mishal Hus…
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Oct 3, 2018
S2, Ep1 How to Fail: Jessie Burton
We're BACK! How To Fail With Elizabeth Day returns for a second season, and to kick this one off, I'm joined by mega-star, besteslling author Jessie Burton.
Burton's 2014 debut novel, The Miniaturist, was published in 38 countries and sold over a million copies and last Christmas, it was adapted into a sumptuous two-part BBC drama starring Romola Garai and Anya Taylor-Joy. Her secnd novel, The Muse, was a Sunday Times bestseller and Burton has just published her first book for children, The Restless Girls.
But Jessie actually started out wanting to be an actress, and spent much of her 20s trying and failing to land parts. Writing was something she did on the side, which eventually became her full-time career. It wasn't all plain-sailing, however, and in this interview, Jessie talks movingly about her struggles with anxiety, her breakdown at the height of her success and her failure to grieve the end of a meaningful relationship. We also talk about bodies, beauty, ambition and what to…
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Aug 30, 2018
How to Fail: End of Season 1
A thank you from Elizabeth for listening to the first season of How To Fail With Elizabeth Day and a sneak peek of the guests lined up for season two.
See you in October!
How To Fail is hosted by Elizabeth Day and produced by Chris Sharp
How To Fail is sponsored by Moorish
The Party by Elizabeth Day is published by 4th Estate
Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
Chris Sharp @chrissharpaudio
Moorish @moorishhumous
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Aug 29, 2018
S1, Ep8 How to Fail: Elizabeth Day