Danger is "appearing to be"
Play • 18 min
Are you pretending to be happy? How does this question make you feel?

View this post on HeathArmstrong.com

There is great danger when you value “appearing to be” over “being”

“Appearing to be” is pretending to be something you are not, usually at the expense of yourself and the benefit of someone else. “Being” is honoring the truth within you no matter how messy it may be.

Here are some examples:

  1. Doing what you “should” (appearing to be) vs. Doing what truly lights you up (being)
  2. Hiding behind your smile (appearing to be) vs. Smiling while you cry because you are sharing your truth and it feels relieving (being)
  3. Sharing filtered pictures to enhance your features or correct your blemishes (appearing to be) vs. Sharing your raw, natural beauty and helping others build confidence to do the same (being)
  4. Telling your friends that your broken relationship is thriving to avoid shame and judgment (appearing to be) vs. Communicating honestly with your partner, friends, and therapist about your hardships, thus creating opportunity for healing and growth (being)
  5. Resisting exercise or meditation because you are “too busy” (appearing to be) vs. Prioritizing self-care practices, thus enhancing all aspects of your life (being)

“Appearing to be” is resistance. It feels easy in the moment but destroys you over time.

“Being” is the hardest work of all, but it bears eternal fruits. It removes the space between you and your truth.

Are you appearing to be, or are you being?

Be aware of the gremlins

“Appearing to be” is also an elusive trick of mASS media, corrupt politicians, and con-artists. These tricksters are predatory gremlins.

Their schemes may sound familiar:

“Act the part” even though you don’t enjoy it. “Do as you are told” even though you don’t want to. “Follow the rules” even though they only benefit someone else. “Be good” even though good and bad are completely subjective. “Behave” or endure shame and punishment…

As you strive to live in truth, be aware of the world that “appears to be.”

Choose to be a hot mess

What if you allow yourself to simply be you? What if you unleash the raw, hot mess of beauty and chaos within you?

Choosing to be (rather than appearing to be) sets you free.

Exploration keeps you free.

Creating removes the trap altogether.

Do you really have anything better to do?

doodle by @thingsintedshead

Creative maniac quote & idea for you

“All that you see out in front of you is how you feel inside your head.” – Alan Watts

With this breath, you have an opportunity to invite more flowers, laughter, and love into your head and out into the world.

Take a moment to write down 3 ways you haven’t been entirely truthful to yourself and those around you. How will you make changes to start “being” rather than “appearing to be” in each of these 3 ways?

Don’t hesitate to make the necessary changes. Start now. Your future self is already twerking in celebration.

More episodes
Search
Clear search
Close search
Google apps
Main menu