Jun 6, 2022
10 Things Never To Say To A Pregnant Mama 🤦🏻♀️
I'm not done with this pregnancy rodeo that's for sure, but the clock is tickin' and I'm getting close! Just 10-12 more weeks before my bundle arrives and I thought I'd share my thoughts on some "lovely things" I've personally heard and experienced and some I've learned from other mama friends. I mostly wanted to share this because once upon a time I too was ignorant, not informed and educated and well, let's just say now, now I know better!
Before I begin, let me start off by saying two things:
*
Most people are well meaning. They really are. They don't purposely say awful things.
*
Some people are uneducated, inexperienced and have zero clue what it's like to be pregnant because, well - they simply never have been, so if that is you - please know it's OKAY if you've said or done these things. I'm not here to torment you, but to simply shine a light on a "better way to be" because it matters.
Take this blog as a learning lesson on how to better behave and respond when it comes to communicating with a mama-to-be. Because trust me, the last thing you want to do is say something insensitive and simply wrong when you could've been that bright and loving person you know you are deep down.
Here are things you should NEVER say and some better alternatives:
*
Wow, you're so tiny/big!! 🤔 We know! lol. We don't need you to highlight our growing bodies and scream it out loud for all to hear. Women's bodies for many are a sensitive topic naturally and especially during pregnancy. It's hard to not compare yourself to what you looked like before or to the next mama. Do yourself a favor and say something like this instead: "wow, congratulations!" "I'm so happy for you!" "You look incredible!" "How's pregnancy treating you??"
*
You look so tired! 😴 No shit sherlock lol. Pregnancy isn't tiring - it's f'n exhausting some days, weeks and even months. Try carrying around a heavy watermelon glued to your belly, with groin aches, severe back aches, nausea, little to no sleep, raging hormones and throw in life/work responsibilities and trying to maintain some type of social life and do what you love that feels good. It's not impossible but it's hard some days. Be kind, especially to a mama-to-be! Instead you can say, "How are you feeling?" "I'd love to help out if I can, anything special I can do for you?" "Want to grab lunch? I'll pick you up, my treat!" or "I'd love to come over and bring snacks and watch a movie, are you up for a little company?" or "Let's go for a walk if you're up for it, fresh air is always helpful!"
*
You've gained a lot of weight! You've gotten fat! 🤭 Yes, only the ignorant will say this and it's usually because they have zero idea what it takes to carry a baby and maintain a healthy weight to create and sustain LIFE! Most who say this literally have no idea that babies can't survive without food, energy, protein, healthy fats, amniotic liquid to protect the baby, a placenta, a growing uterus that stretches up to 500 TIMES it's normal size and that given you don't have your period for 9 months, you also carry that weight in extra blood too as it prepares you for birth. It's okay, when you know better, hopefully - you do better. Instead you can say, "You are glowing!" "It's incredible what your body can do!" "I'd love to learn more about all the changes!" I personally love a curious person and would much rather educate someone who really does want to learn than have to entertain incredibly insensitive and rude comments.
Press play to hear the rest!!
With love,
Violet
@violet_ventures