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Your Life Lived Well
Dr. Kevin J. Payne
Using behavioral science to live better with chronic illness.
Feb 1, 2024
Pain is sending a message, but we misinterpret what it’s trying to tell us. Our pain systems get confused and overwrought. And our healthcare system mishandles our treatment. In this episode, we’ll dive into the weird world of pain and discuss some research-backed strategies you can implement to improve your quality of life. https://www.yourlivelivedwell.co/ Share this with someone who needs it. Like, Subscribe. And leave a glowing review.
Jan 11, 2024
Grief is messy and surprising. It is, ironically, a side effect of living and loving. But we’re not taught how to grieve well — or to support another’s grief. This episode is a small reflection on what grief means, why it happens, and how we can successfully honor its significance together. Share this with someone who needs to listen.
Jan 4, 2024
Behavior Change, revisited
If you need to change something about yourself and yet you keep failing, I guarantee you’ll have a better understanding of what works after listening to this episode. Share this with someone who needs to listen. https://www.yourlivelivedwell.co/
Jan 2, 2024
We're Back for Season 4!
I’m Dr. Kevin Payne and the Your Life Lived Well podcast is back for Season 4. We went silent for a while because…well, I lost my voice. Multiple sclerosis can be frustrating. Over a year ago, I was stricken with dysphonia. It’s really hard to podcast when you can’t speak. But I’ve been through a lot with MS, and this was just the next challenge. Season 4 debuts on Thursday, January 4th. Open your favorite podcast app right now and subscribe! https://YourLifeLivedWell.co/
Apr 22, 2022
Being a 'Sick' Man
Men don’t do well at being “sick.” So what happens when we’re stuck with a chronic illness that won’t go away? These are the challenges (that we don’t want to talk about) arising from the collision between sickness and manhood. More important, these are some suggestions to help you live well, in spite of those challenges. Listen to this one with someone in your life who needs to understand. https://yourlifelivedwell.co/ https://patreon.com/YourLLWell/
Mar 26, 2022
Life with Multiple Sclerosis
In recognition of Multiple Sclerosis Awareness Month, I shed some light on what Multiple Sclerosis is and the surprising ways it affects our lives — especially my own. https://yourlifelivedwell.co https://patreon.com/yourllwell
Dec 2, 2021
Words have Power
This episode digs into the words surrounding health, illness, and disability. We look at how words shape our thoughts, the surprising meanings of some common medical words, and how words can both tear us down and lift us up. Your words matter and this is why.
Jul 20, 2021
Stigma, Acceptance & Mental Illness
Why do we have such a difficult time accepting the reality of mental illness? In this episode, we’ll talk about the reasons why many are uncomfortable with mental illness, and we’ll suggest some better ways to think about what mental illnesses are are. We’ll also introduce some steps we can all take to improve our support and acceptance of mental health conditions.
Jul 14, 2021
Everyone thinks they should relax more, but we can’t make ourselves relax. It doesn’t work that way. Here’s why relaxation is important, what’s getting in our way, and how we can really get to it.
Jul 7, 2021
"You Don't Look Sick"
96% of us with lasting health conditions are largely or completely “invisible.” We don’t have any external signals that remind others of the battles we are fighting inside. That’s confusing to others and they don’t understand. Here’s why we’re confusing, what’s really happening, and how we can help one another appreciate what invisible illness does to our lives. Listen to this one with someone in your life who needs to understand.
Jun 17, 2021
Pain isn't What You Think
Pain is sending you a message, but we tend to misinterpret what it’s trying to tell us. Our pain systems also get confused and overwrought. Chronic pain also easily becomes “noise,” and not a meaningful signal. In this episode, we’ll dive into the weird world of chronic pain and discuss some research-backed strategies you can implement to improve your life.
Jun 2, 2021
Stress isn't What You Think
Stress is a part of life. Sometimes, it’s even a good part of life. It’s always there, so we must learn better strategies to cope. In this episode, we’ll discover what stress really is, distinguish between its helpful and harmful forms, and learn so better ways for dealing with it.
May 26, 2021
Fear isn't What You Think
Fear is part of being human. We’ve all experienced it — whether we admit it or not. But for such a common experience, we misunderstand it far more than we realize. This episode is a deep dive into what fear really is and what it’s doing for us. It’s also about how to make fear your friend.
May 19, 2021
Burnout & Compassion Fatigue
“Burnout” is rampant in the healthcare and caregiving professions. “Compassion fatigue” strikes even the most devoted loved ones and caregivers. These can leave us feeling angry, guilty, confused…or just empty. But they are natural, understandable reactions to the lasting and repeated trauma of supporting others through the worst moments of their lives. Here’s how to recognize their effects early and some things to do when they strike.
May 12, 2021
Finding Hope when Hopeless
Staying hopeful is a real challenge with chronic illness — for those diagnosed and for their closest loved ones. In this episode, I invite you into a raw conversation about becoming hopeless and finding hope again in your own life. Hope is a precious resource for life with a chronic illness. It can become stretched too thin by our challenges, but we can renew and restore it with patience and support. Hope is a skill that can be learned and must be practiced.
May 5, 2021
Be Kinder to Yourself
Most of us aren’t very kind to ourselves, but we need to be. This episode dives into what it really means to be kind to yourself, as opposed to just occasionally “nice.” Along the way, we understand what self-esteem and self-compassion are doing in your life, how they can become challenged by the ongoing distress of life with chronic illness, and what we can do to improve self-esteem and (more important) bolster self-compassion.
Apr 29, 2021
A Good Night's Sleep
We all need better sleep. Better sleep is a necessary key to a better life. But good sleep seems to be in short supply. In this episode we talk about why so many of us sleep so poorly, and we suggest the most important things research says we can do to insure the good night’s sleep we all crave.
Apr 21, 2021
We know we’re supposed to exercise. So why is it so hard? What should we do? Why should I care, especially when I already have a chronic health condition? How can we get started and keep going? We’ll answer these questions and more as we talk about how to get moving.
Apr 14, 2021
In this second episode on meditation, we discuss research supporting its benefits (and its limitations). Dr. Payne also introduces you to several kinds of meditation that can be useful for improving quality of life with chronic illness. And we discuss tools and communities that can help you with your journey.
Apr 7, 2021
Look on the Bright Side!
There’s a lot about life with a chronic health condition that rightly gets us down. When we’re feeling bad, those around us often resort to advising that we need to “look on the bright side” — as if that were the actual problem. However, our mindset does have a huge impact on our quality of life. It’s not simply a matter of “choice,” but there are tactics that really can help us brighten our outlooks and improve our experiences, even under the most difficult circumstances.
Mar 31, 2021
Grief is not what we expect. It’s messy. It doesn’t follow a neat path. And it’s not always neatly resolved. Yet loss is a necessary part of living — and it’s something that a life touched by chronic illness must navigate. Here’s a better way to think about grief and some strategies for accommodating the real demands of loss.
Mar 24, 2021
Meditation isn’t what you probably think it is. We dive in to meditation as exercise for the parts of our mind we want to be strong, a way to become more aware and forgiving of ourselves, and an indispensable tools for improving your quality of life when faced by the distress of life with a chronic health condition.
Mar 17, 2021
Joe Mays on Football, Health & Life
I’m happy to welcome Joe Mays, former NFL player (and Kansas City Chief) and co-owner of Kansas City’s Laya Center, a holistic wellness spa. We share a wide-ranging conversation about everything from holistic healing, the lasting health consequences of a life in football, vegetarianism, adapting to health traumas, and the role of risk in a fulfilling life.
Mar 13, 2021
Help! I was just diagnosed!
You, or someone you love, has just been diagnosed with a life changing — maybe life threatening — medical condition. It’s big. It’s scary. It’s overwhelming. And life won’t be the same. Here’s how not to lose yourself or the things you love about your life. Learn the three most important things you need to do first.
Mar 3, 2021
“How You Doin’?”
It’s an innocent little question, and maybe the most difficult one we face with a chronic illness. We’ll unpack the minefield of, “how are you feeling today?” Do we tell the truth? A casual lie? Where do we draw the boundary of disclosure and how do we handle the consequences of this common, well-intentioned social inquiry?