In this episode of Rise and Find, Mindfull Aus founder Matt Runnalls tells his story of depression and recovery and how you can support your loved ones through similar battles. Matt kicks off this discussion by talking about how men are not really predisposed—or even prepared—to be able to talk about their mental health or fits of anxiety and depression. Because of this, they either don’t talk about it, or they suffer under the weight.
Having seen suicide far too many times, Matt is familiar with the signs. He urges listeners to reach out to friends and family and let them know you really do care about them. Find ways to show them your love. The sign that is almost never talked about, Matt says, is the “mask.” The people closest to suicide will almost never look like the disheveled messes that we’re often told to look for. In fact, they will probably start to appear as though they are carrying themselves well. This can be alarming, but it’s not always a good sign. Matt shares from his own experience that when he had made up his mind, he started cleaning his room and left every conversation with joy—so no one would have to worry.
The key takeaway is that you can help people around you by paying attention to their needs and really showing up. Things aren’t always going to feel normal, but people need to know that their suffering is not in vain, and that they have people in their circles who can share that load and help them carry it. Life doesn’t have to be meaningless. There is joy in seeing the betterment of someone else, as Matt says.
TOPICS WE COVER AND WHERE YOU CAN FIND THEM:
(5:20): Matt explains why he founded Mindful Aus to help people fight stigma and regain a sense of hope.
(9:00): Men are not really equipped to talk about their emotional states without being seen as feminine.
(12:30): Stress, pain and trauma are the things that build resilience. We all want resilience, but we tend to run from the difficult circumstances that build it in us.
(14:45): Enduring the lockdowns was especially difficult for Matt. He talks about removing the things that made lockdown difficult, like alcohol.
(16:50): Matt says that logistically, he was able to accomplish more in lockdown than he would have if he’d been on the road. We need to make the most of our situations.
(20:00): Matt urges us to call and check in on our friends. It’s our own responsibility to stay close to the ones we love. And there is no excuse for missing signs and symptoms of deteriorating mental health in a friend. Being “busy” included.
(25:00): Being proactive and taking your life back into your own hands.
(28:45): Some of the most common symptoms of someone contemplating suicide.
(31:30): We can prevent people from taking their own lives by showing up and caring, and not just saying that we’ll do that.
(36:50): We are all professionals. We all know what it’s like to struggle and deal with pain, and we can help our friends in the wake of health services.
(41:00): You can rewire your brain to think differently about your negative interactions and emotions.
(46:00): You have to step into vulnerability to remove a shell we are just carrying around.
(51:00): Reinforcing with positive habits is key to putting the next foot forward.
(55:30): Early intervention at Mindfull Aus.
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