Talk About Cancer
Serena Hu
Subscribe
Talk About Cancer is a podcast of stories from cancer patients, survivors, caregivers, and family members. The host, Serena Hu, talks to her guests about their emotional journeys with cancer and what happens to the relationships in their lives after a cancer diagnosis. They will often explore how culture and faith shape each person's experience of cancer and grief. You will find diverse perspectives, honesty, and wisdom in these stories to help you deal with cancer and its aftermath. Follow for new stories each week. http://talkaboutcancerpodcast.com
Available episodes
Newest first
Oldest first
Jan 1, 2022
An oncologist's cancer story
Reema shared how her cancer experience might have been similar to and different from someone who is not an oncologist, and how this experience has influenced the way she practices medicine today.
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
Before talking to Reema, I wondered how her experience with cancer might be different from people who are not doctors. The one thing that I didn’t expect was the extra layer of stress she had when family and friends continued to look to her to be the expert of her own situation. She definitely was the medical expert, but I can see how wearing the “doctor” and the “patient” hats at the same time would be very confusing and exhausting. As she gently reminded me during our conversation - doctors are humans too! And there are simply no shortcuts when it comes to navigating the emotional experience of cancer.
playlist_add
Dec 24, 2021
On the ride
Charles shared how having lost so many family members to cancer shapes how he approaches caregiving for his wife today, and how leaning into art and dark humor has helped him process and cope with it all.
* *
Check out some of Charles' recent work:
* Short film: A History of Worry
* Short story collection: Slippery When Metastasized
* Coloring book: Pug Monster Gallery
* HuffPost article about air guitar workout
You can connect with him on his website, Twitter, and Instagram.
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I was struck by the way Charles framed his caregiving experience as being "on the ride.” I never thought about my own caregiving experience this way because it sounds a bit detached or somehow not invested in what’s going on. But I knew that was not what Charles meant and when I thought more about it, I realized how helpful this framing could be for caregivers - because it takes us out of the “driver seat,” which is what many of us would try to “inhabit” in a difficult situation because we feel it’s what we are supposed to do to take care of our loved ones. But when we do that, our own needs can come to the forefront and the needs of the person dealing with cancer could get lost.
This framing also acknowledges that we will not have complete control over the situation and it’s not our fault if our loved ones have to suffer. Acceptance doesn’t mean that we don’t try our best to provide support, but it takes the pressure off of caregivers to keep searching for the perfect solution when often, that does not exist.
playlist_add
Dec 9, 2021
I didn't cause this
Nefa-Tari shared the devastating experience of being diagnosed with uterine cancer and ending her marriage soon after, and how she eventually found her way out of that incredibly tough period by advocating for her own needs and leaning on her faith.
Check out the services SHARE offers and connect with Nefa-Tari!
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
Losing a relationship after a cancer diagnosis - whether a family member or a friend - can feel like the ultimate betrayal for cancer people. I’ve learned early on that some people just don’t know how to deal with all the emotions and responsibilities that come with a cancer diagnosis, but it still sucks when the person you thought you could count really isn’t up for the job. Like Nefa Tari and other guests on the show have mentioned, when dealing with cancer, you have to prioritize yourself, even if that means ending relationships that are so important to you. But the space that gets vacated will be filled by people who can meet you where you are.
playlist_add
Nov 25, 2021
What is the universe telling me
Sagar took us through some in-depth reflections about health, purpose, and the importance of having a creative outlet, which he discovered when his wife started to paint on his head after chemo.
Check Sagar and Sheena's collaborations on Instagram @myheadisacanvas!*
*Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
We have heard about so many different types of creative outlets from the guests this year. Many write, some create art. I love that Sagar’s version of the creative outlet is a combination of both of those things AND it’s done in collaboration with his wife, Sheena. We often talk about how caregivers’ needs may be less prominent so this is a beautiful way for Sagar to bring her along on the healing process.
playlist_add
Nov 17, 2021
Rebuilding life after caregiving
Kandis shared how she picked herself back up one step at a time after a tough caregiving experience and how she eventually found positive ways to channel her grief.
Some resources Kandis mentioned:
* Gilda's Club Chicago
* Ovarian Cancer Research Alliance
* Therapy for Black Girls
Also check out Kandis' article about compound caregiving on Caregiving.com.
You can follow her on Instagram @kandi_koated.
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
Thanks to Kandis for sharing what it was like to return to work after having been a full-time caregiver for a number of years. This is another layer of complexity that caregivers have to deal with on top of the emotional turmoils that could come with grieving the loss of a loved one. And Kandis was absolutely right about feeling bad about yourself when you keep getting rejected by employers. I know that feeling and can only imagine how hard it would be to have to go to interviews when you are still trying to make sense of the traumas you experienced. Kandis’ experience reminds us how important and helpful working with a therapist can be when you are dealing with grief.
playlist_add
Nov 11, 2021
The family gets cancer too
Melody shared what it was like to deal with cancer during her childhood, the ways that experience has influenced different stages of her life, and the things she continues to uncover as an adult.
You can follow Melody on Instagram @lunapeakfoundation, on Facebook @lunapeakfouncation, or on Twitter @lunapeakfamily. You can also find more information about the foundation at https://www.lunapeakfoundation.org/.
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I’ve been reflecting on Melody’s experience trying to talk to her family members about their experience being her caregivers. As I’ve mentioned in the past, I’m a big believer in processing the challenging experiences in life. Some like me, prefer to talk about the experiences, many find creative outlets like writing, visual arts, or music.
But when I heard Melody’s family members’ reactions, it made me wonder if processing is not good for everyone? Or maybe, for some the processing is so painful that they need an expert - like a therapist - to guide them through it. So nudging someone to process when they are not ready or have the adequate “tools” to do so is probably not going to work so well. This is another example of how my guests’ experiences continue to help me understand perspectives that are different from mine.
playlist_add
Nov 4, 2021
Don't have to be superman
Akili reflected on the disruptions he faced when his son Kaine was diagnosed with leukemia more than two years ago and the growth he had to go through to survive this “good” bad diagnosis.
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I still don’t know how Akili manages to do everything he has to do from being a father of six and juggling multiple jobs on top of Kaine’s medical appointments! He’s probably one of those people who only sleeps four hours a night. Even then, as Akili said, it takes a village to get through an experience like this, and I’m so glad he got to a place where he felt comfortable with asking for help and receiving help.
I also loved Akili’s point about performing random acts of kindness and how it’s what makes our communities stronger. It’s a really important message for us to remember at a time when we are going through so much trauma and loss across so many communities.
On a more positive note, Kaine got his port removed one month early and is on track to finish chemo by early December!
playlist_add
Oct 27, 2021
When my vagina broke
Anna explained how cancer treatment “broke” her vagina and the challenges with dating when she took sexual intercourse off the table. Her experiences inspired her to create the Entwine dating app to help others like her find companionship with confidence.
You can follow the app on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter!
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I know this episode probably feels different from the rest because Anna and I ended up going on a deep dive about her experience with vaginismus, but I thought it was important that we give space for this topic because even though Anna’s experience is specific to having vaginismus, her underlying message is relevant to anyone dealing with sexual limitations after cancer treatment.
Anna reminded us that sex and intimacy can come in many forms, and when our loved ones’ sexual needs change because of serious health issues or emotional stress, expanding our definitions of sex and intimacy can give us more options for supporting each other’s needs.
Thanks again to Anna for sharing her own experience with such openness and a sense of humor. Go check out Entwine so you can explore dating with more confidence again!
playlist_add
Oct 20, 2021
Talk about the elephant
Lauren shared what it was like to follow her daughter Melissa's lead in having open conversations about end-of-life wishes, which gave Lauren a path forward during grief and led to the founding of 13 Thirty Cancer Connect to support thousands of AYA cancer patients in her community.
Find out more about 13 Thirty Cancer Connect's programs that are now available virtually and locally in Rochester NY and Syracuse NY.
Please follow the podcast if these stories are resonating with you. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I thought a lot about what Melissa’s brother said during his graduation speech to his 400 classmates 20 years ago - that Melissa’s life was not taken away, but that it was just shorter than most. I’m astounded by how much is packed in that one simple sentence in the mind of a 16-year-old. There was a sense of defiance, meaning - don’t pity my sister. But there was also this profound wisdom about - it’s not how long you live that matters, but what you do with the time you were given. I know that losing my dad helped me better appreciate the finality of my own life and has given me focus and gratitude that I probably would not otherwise have if I didn’t go through that painful experience with him.
I’m also keenly aware, however, that insights like this are often luxury in a sense. It’s a perspective that’s easier to hold when you can put the adversity behind you. For those in the thick of things, it may not be so easy. But that’s also what’s really incredible about Melissa, is that she had that clarity while facing her imminent death.
playlist_add
Oct 14, 2021
Finding post-traumatic growth
Fabian took us back to the time when his existential crisis collided with his cancer diagnosis and how he was able to pull through 900 days of chemo with a vision to support other cancer people struggling with mental health.
You can download the War On Cancer app on your phone and check out the amazing Clinical Trial Finder feature. You can also connect with Fabian on Instagram @fabianbolin.
*
*Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
What’s really important about Fabian’s story is that oftentimes when you get a cancer diagnosis, it doesn’t mean that whatever crisis you were already facing in your personal life just gets put on hold. As we heard, crises can have a way of amplifying each other and making the experience more complex and difficult to untangle. I was really impressed with how Fabian was able to pull apart what was helping him vs not in the middle of such an intense emotional rollercoaster. It shows how much work he has put into processing his own experiences, and ultimately, channeling the learnings towards building the War on Cancer platform to support other cancer people struggling with mental health.
playlist_add
Oct 6, 2021
When my world shattered
Brianna talked about how isolating the caregiving and the grieving experiences can be, and how creating art in a nonverbal way can be incredibly cathartic and healing.
Check out Brianna's artwork on her website and let me know what it brings up for you! Also, follow her on Instagram @briannalhb so you will get updates about her upcoming workshops and shows.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
By coincidence, Brianna and I lost our loved ones - her mom and my dad - around the same time four years ago. Our conversation uncovered so many similarities and differences between our experiences of caregiving and grief, and all…
playlist_add
Sep 30, 2021
Saved by activism
Laura explained how being diagnosed with cancer gave new meaning to her work as a health care advocate and that staying engaged with advocacy actually helped her push through her cancer treatment.
Laura mentioned Imerman Angels, which has also been referenced by a few other guests on this podcast about the wonderful one-on-one peer support they offer.
If you are interested in getting your story out for advocacy efforts, check out the resources offered by Laura’s nonprofit Health Care Voices. You can also check out Laura's video on Now This asking Trump to not take away her health insurance by repealing Obamacare. Connect with Laura on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. I would also be grateful if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@…
playlist_add
Sep 23, 2021
Be present with the pain
Michelle and Phil shared some of the most challenging moments, thoughts, and feelings they’ve had in their caregiving and grief process over the last three decades, and how they were able to eventually move forward from the devastating loss of their son Gabe.
You can read more about their story in an article Phil had written for the San Diego Reader. Also, check out Okizu and the amazing services they are still providing to families today.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I asked Phil our recording what he meant by the following (in reference to his last moments with Gabe):
"I feel like having gotten through that mom…
playlist_add
Sep 15, 2021
Check off your bucket list
Gaz shared how he’s dealing with a terminal diagnosis as a young adult and why for a practical person like him, living from scan to scan takes on a different meaning.
You can connect with Gaz on Instagram @Gaz_Emmerson where you will see that he’s still biking to his chemo appointments and enjoy concerts with his friends. You will also find the link to his fundraiser for Sarcoma UK there, which now stands at a whopping $111K pounds!
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I really appreciate having the opportunity to talk to Gaz about his cancer experience, because it’s a bit like an anti-thesis to this podcast, where I…
playlist_add
Sep 9, 2021
Not my story
Julieta talked openly about grappling with not being cancer-free after her chemo treatment and the complex layers of love, fear, and hope she’s balancing with her intergenerational family. *
*Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I invited Julieta on the show because I wanted to help elevate her message as a cancer advocate in the Latino community, but this intergenerational story we ended up diving into was so much more complex than I expected, such as the way Julieta and her mom try to protect one another by shielding things that may be upsetting to the other person, and how Julieta doesn’t want her daughter to now feel…
playlist_add
Sep 2, 2021
We were so young
Rachel shared some of the most intimate moments from her and her late husband’s cancer experience, including how she knew when it was time to let go.
You can find Rachel’s book Wife, Widow, Now What? on Amazon and follow her on Facebook and Instagram.
Also, check out CaringBridge as a resource for anyone who wants to blog about your health experience but doesn't want to deal with the headaches of set up a blog site.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
We covered so much ground in this conversation with Rachel, from the initial diagnosis all the way to forging a new life years after her late husband’s passing. I know…
playlist_add
Aug 26, 2021
Fast forward your life
Babz walked us through how he reacted when he first got his diagnosis and how he quickly realized that dealing with cancer was mostly a mental game.
You can check out Babz's Community Interest Company Freshrb, which uses video production to highlight marginalized health issues.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
Babz mentioned the idea of “fast-forwarding your life” a few times during our discussion, and I thought it’s a pretty succinct way to describe a critical part of people’s experience with cancer because in an instant, a cancer diagnosis forces you to answer all the major life questions you haven’t yet ans…
playlist_add
Aug 19, 2021
Secret society of caregivers
Sue gave us a glimpse into the struggles of caring for a loved one who is fully dependent on her and how in an extreme situation like this, self-care may just mean grabbing a few Oreos.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
A big “thank you” to Sue for giving me a precious hour from her day to share her caregiving experience with us. Her situation with her husband is pretty extreme but there were actually many elements I could connect with, such as having a very short horizon and only being able to focus on getting through each task at hand or having a sense of being in a “secret society” where your own life seems so…
playlist_add
Aug 11, 2021
Find beauty in the path
Tara talked about the multiple transformations she has had to go through: from being a caretaker to survivor to thriver, and from natural ways of healing to eventually facing her fears of chemotherapy.
You can find Tara's bestseller book Grace, Grit, and Gratitude on Amazon and connect with her on Instagram @taracoyote.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
Tara is the only person I’ve spoken with to date who has said “thank you” to chemo. It’s an incredible statement, especially because she’s had such a traumatic experience with her friend’s chemo treatment. It’s also a powerful example of her message to us -…
playlist_add
Aug 5, 2021
Not just a number
Shoni gets vulnerable and candid about her mom’s and her own experience with cancer and why her voice as a Black woman, matters.
You can connect with Shoni on Instagram @brsuga and learn more about For the Breast of Us on their website.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
After our recording, I thought a lot about Shoni’s experience with the receptionist at the oncologist’s office. It’s the kind of experience that is so familiar to those of us who have had to navigate the healthcare system to get care for complex medical conditions. But it is even more stressful when you know that by speaking up, you will be labele…
playlist_add
Jul 29, 2021
New lease on life
Jared shared what it was like to get a blood stem cell transplant in the middle of the pandemic and how he is adjusting to the identity and life of a survivor, including edible gummies, makeup experiments, and being a Be The Match ambassador.
You can find Jared on Instagram at @jaredlips and listen to his fun podcast Back on Air.
Learn more about Be The Match and how to become a donor on its website.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I had a lot of fun chatting with Jared, especially the part about shitty self-care, for a couple of reasons: I was slightly amused that South Park is part of Jared’s way to “check-out”…
playlist_add
Jul 21, 2021
Question the expert
Emily talked about the importance of listening to your body and not being afraid to question your doctor when his or her guidance is contrary to what you believe is the right answer for you. She also shared what it was like to deal with an unexpected disability after surgery.
You can find Emily @wonkyarm on Instagram and at her blog.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Email info@talkaboutcancerpodcast.com or come say hi on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, or Linkedin!
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
You probably heard me talk more during this episode than most others because I was feeling pretty frustrated by the experiences Emily had to go through with her doctor. I know she was being very diplomatic about not discounting his…
playlist_add
Jul 14, 2021
A journey with no regrets
Kunal shared his experience taking on the caregiver role as his wife dealt with breast cancer and how setting clear boundaries for everyone involved - including himself - ultimately helped him to walk away from the experience with no regrets.
The books that Kunal found helpful for working through his grief after his wife passed away are:
* The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
* Option B by Sheryl Sandberg
* My Gita by Devdutt Pattanaik
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the conversation:
I really admire the way Kunal was very clear-eyed about his priorities in a really complicated situation that often has no good answers. Take the way he mana…
playlist_add
Jul 8, 2021
A splash of blue in pink
Rod shared his experience as a male breast cancer patient and how that experience led him to become an advocate and create a resource site to serve the needs of the male breast cancer community.
You can find Rod on Twitter or at his website http://malebc.org/.
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the episode:
I’m super appreciative of Rod coming on the show to share his experience as a male breast cancer survivor and advocate. I learned so much - from how the lack of awareness about male breast cancer results in more delayed and therefore more dire diagnosis, to the differences in how men seek support online. It was also very interesting t…
playlist_add
Jul 1, 2021
The real side effects of cancer
Dorothy explained what it was like to be diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 26 and how being at high risk for developing ovarian cancer within the decade made major life decisions incredibly complicated for her.
You can find Dorothy on Instagram or at the Atrium Foundation website. Check out her book 26 & Fu¢ked where you can get her full story.
Want to hear other stories from cancer patients, survivors, or co-survivors like this one? Want to share your story? Get in contact with me at: https://talkaboutcancerpodcast.com/
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the episode:
Before speaking with Dorothy, I didn’t fully understand the…
playlist_add
Jun 24, 2021
Trust your inner voice
Angel shared how being a nurse has affected her experience with her mom’s cancer care and why it’s crucial for caregivers to honor their own needs during and after the caregiving journey.
Want to hear other stories from cancer patients, survivors, caregivers, or family members like this one? Want to share your story? Get in contact with me at: https://talkaboutcancerpodcast.com/
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the episode:
I loved hearing and actually seeing the transformation Angel is experiencing in her life during our conversation. It was obvious that when we talked about her experience with her mom’s cancer care, there was sti…
playlist_add
Jun 16, 2021
A second chance at life
Marlene told the story of how she first heard about her cancer diagnosis not from the doctor, but in a message from her grandfather who she’s never met, and why her cancer journey has ultimately transformed her life in a positive way.
You can listen to more of Marlene’s and others’ stories about surviving trauma on her podcast called Surviving Trauma: Stories of Hope and follow her page on Facebook at My Centered Life.*
*
Want to hear other stories from cancer patients, survivors, caregivers, or family members like this one? Want to share your story? Get in contact with me at: https://talkaboutcancerpodcast.com/
Please follow the podcast if you are enjoying the show. Would also be awesome if you can leave an honest rating and review so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My re…
playlist_add
Jun 9, 2021
Fight for your joy
Alicia described the ways in which faith has shaped her dad’s outlook and experience with end-of-life and why the last six weeks of his life were both the best and the hardest.
Want to share your story about your cancer journey as a survivor, caregiver, or family member? Get in touch with me!
Have topic suggestions or feedback about the show? Contact me on Instagram or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Please follow the podcast if you enjoy the show. I would also really appreciate it if you can leave an honest rating and review in Apple Podcasts or Podchaser so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there.
Thank you for listening!
++++++++++++
My reflections on the episode:
I had thought this conversation with Alicia would be a bit teary because we both had gone through the end-of-life process with our dads relatively recently. But it didn’t turn out to be that way because her dad had faith to lean on during his journey with cancer, w…
playlist_add
Jun 2, 2021
Redefining purpose through writing
Ilene shared her journey as a 7-year metastatic breast cancer endurer and how picking up the pen and paper to write again has, in more ways than one, helped her continue to live beyond the statistics.
* Ilene's blog is called Cancerbus
* You can find her on Twitter @ilenealizah
* You can find out more about the wonderful retreat she went to at the Commonweal Retreat Center
* She also mentioned the book The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully by Frank Ostaseski and the podcast On Being.
Please follow the podcast if you would like to hear more stories from cancer endurers, caregivers, and family members. I would really appreciate it if you can leave an honest rating and review in Apple Podcasts or Podchaser so I know if I am serving the interests and needs of you listeners out there. You can also share any feedback and suggestions directly to me by visiting my Instagram page or email me at talkaboutcancerpodcast@gmail.com.
Thank you for li…
playlist_add
May 26, 2021
Don't try to fix everything
Dori helps us understand why open communication is so important when a family member is living with an incurable diagnosis and how she’s been working hard to be fully transparent and honoring the needs of her husband and children on their journey with cancer.
I’m super appreciative of the personal reflections Dori shared in this conversation. At the core, her message has been so consistent, which is that open communication is so important for families navigating the cancer journey. She demonstrated this beautifully with her children by being completely transparent about what was happening, checked in on how they were feeling, and gave them a choice about how they wanted to be involved.
What was even more amazing was that she had explicitly given her husband the permission to do as he wished, even if that meant not to continue living. I can’t imagine what courage and love it took for her to have that conversation. She also brought so much humility by admitting that even though s…
playlist_add
May 19, 2021
Do what's right for you
Andy talked about the hard decisions he has had to make in taking a holistic approach to his cancer treatment and how having been grounded with the right mindset got him through one of the greatest challenges he’s faced.*
*If you are looking for someone who practices what he preaches, Andy is your guy. As a seasoned talent development coach, he walked into his cancer journey with a strong mindset for dealing with the challenges that life brings. That by no means meant that his cancer experience was somehow easy, but it was very evident that he had a foundation to lean on to navigate the many complex and difficult decisions he has had to make about this medical care.
Even more important was his message about taking ownership of the decisions each of us has to make in life. When I saw his Instagram post about his decision to not pursue the third round of chemotherapy, I was intrigued, because my natural reaction was that it would be safest to follow the advice of the expert. But once…
playlist_add
May 12, 2021
Embrace it all
Jason reflected on his experience of losing his dad as a child and how the cultural norms of the Vietnamese culture shaped his experience of grief and mourning. We also explore what he is doing differently as an adult now that he has had some time to reflect on his earlier experience.
It was so interesting to listen to Jason reflect on his experience of grief as a child and what his perspective is now as an adult. I especially admire the way he was able to reflect on his experience in a non-judgmental way. Because sometimes we can fall into the spiral of regret when it comes to losing a loved one - thinking back over the things we should have said, could have done differently - and just beat ourselves up. So I love that he is at a place where he is accepting of what has happened but also moving forward in a way that better serves his emotional needs while in grief.
One thing he said that really humbled me, which was that - while it’s really hard to lose someone you love to cancer,…
playlist_add
May 5, 2021
Every step of the way
We have our first sister duo on the show to share their story with us. You will hear about how they managed stress family members and friends had unintentionally caused and how they were always a team in getting through every situation.
I had fun chatting with the sister duo Bella and Tonia. As someone who didn’t grow up with a sibling under the same roof, I marveled at the close relationship they have with one another. But what was very interesting to me was that, even as close as they were, they still needed to find support and release away from each other sometimes. Like how Bella talked about feeling like she was on an island during treatment even though Tonia was at every doctor’s appointments, or how Tonia would only cry when she wasn’t around Bella, because Tonia knew it would have only stressed Bella out more to see her in distress. I’m glad they both then also talked about what helped them get through, like how Bella found the support groups on FB so she didn’t feel…
playlist_add
Apr 27, 2021
Give yourself grace
Victoria talked about turning to alcohol to numb the anxiety and pain she experienced in the aftermath of cancer treatment and reminded us to let go of the expectations we put on ourselves and get support to develop healthier ways to cope with trauma.
I so appreciated Victoria for coming on the show to share her story about the trauma she experienced with cancer and alcohol abuse. She brought so much humanity to an issue that may not be talked about very often - which is that in dealing with the mental and physical trauma of cancer, some of us might unintentionally end up coping in ways that are harmful to ourselves and those around us.
The truth is, alcohol use is so common in our society, especially during this past year when almost everyone has had to cope with the disruptions brought on by the pandemic. So many of my friends and family drank just to relax from the workday so it’s not hard to see why people would turn to alcohol when dealing with the trauma they are experiencing…
playlist_add
Apr 20, 2021
See you on the moon
Jason spoke lovingly about his memories of his mom - who battled three types of cancer for over a decade - and the ways in which he continues to remember and honor her legacy since she died in 2019. He also shared some interesting stories about kilts and prostate cancer awareness.
What a storyteller Jason was. There was literally a story to illustrate every point he made in our conversation! It was really interesting to hear how Jason’s experience as an officer for more than 20 years has influenced his perspectives about life and death.
One part that stuck with me was how Jason didn’t make it in time to see his mom before she died, which was so crushing but I could see that Jason was able to move forward from that because he had an important job to do - which was to MC the celebration of life she planned. I mean, what a gift she had given to Jason so that he knew exactly what he needed to do to honor her life and get closure. And then there were the actual gifts for the family as…
playlist_add
Apr 12, 2021
Lean into the pain
Stephanie took us through some of the toughest parts of her cancer journey, including how she had to postpone her wedding, how she got lost in the dark space, and what helped her to get through and eventually reconnect with life again.
A big shout out to Stephanie for doing such a deep dive during our recording. She was so transparent in sharing some of the most vulnerable moments on her journey, and because she is such a great storyteller - which I attribute to her journalist background - I felt like I could see in my head the specific moments and conversations she described as we were chatting.
One thing that really blew me away was the great communication Stephanie and her husband had with each other. As Stephanie described, getting a cancer diagnosis can trigger so many insecurities and emotions because of the physical changes and limitations you experience. In absence of a strong foundation to lean on, it’s not surprising that new conflicts will often come up between family me…
playlist_add
Apr 4, 2021
Us kids banding together
Michelle shared a lovely story about how her whole family came together to share the caregiving responsibilities when her dad’s health started to decline. And how they worked as an incredible team to support their dad and stepmom in the most difficult times, as well as each other through their grieving process.
Listening to Michelle’s story really warmed my heart. There were similarities in our experiences with our dads’ declines but I was so blown away by the way her whole family came together to support one another and made the experience better and more manageable for everyone. It was also really amazing to hear about the way they are continuing to support one another during their grieving process, and they are going about it in a way that gives each person space to work through things in their own way and on their own time.
One thing that I would like to call out is that sometimes people think the grieving process only starts after your loved ones die, but it often starts w…
playlist_add
Mar 29, 2021
Not going out like that
Rudy shared his experience as a brain cancer endurer, about how he learned to embrace new ways to live his life, and identifying a greater purpose that has kept him going beyond two “expiration” dates. He also helped me understand why the term cancer “survivor” is not a universally welcomed label.
I had a lot of fun talking to Rudy. His mind goes a mile a minute and we covered so many topics in this episode. I appreciated that he very gently called out the fact that he doesn’t like the label cancer “survivor” and it made me wonder why I was so oblivious to the debate about all the different terminologies. But I quickly realized it was because my dad was not a native English speaker and so he didn’t really think of himself in those terms. I use the term “survivor” because it seems to be the most common term used by well-known cancer organizations, but from now on, I will ask each guest what they would prefer to be called, although I still haven’t figured out what…
playlist_add
Mar 21, 2021
Tap into more life
Carrie shared her experiences of first being a caregiver to her brother and then becoming a cancer survivor herself. She talks about the anger she still feels about losing her brother but how she has been able to channel that anger towards serving others. As a survivor who’s been in the shoes of a caregiver, she’s taken on the added responsibility of stay strong for her family members because she understands the trauma they have already gone through with losing her brother.
I had so many thoughts about Carrie’s story, mostly because when I started recording the show, I didn’t really consider the dual experience some of us have to go through as caregivers AND survivors. I was so struck by how Carrie had to comfort her mother about her own cancer diagnosis even though it was no less scary for Carrie to think about.
Also, I loved how she explained that while things are not always “sunshine, unicorn, and roses” as she says, she knew she would be ok. It’s a subtle difference…
playlist_add
Mar 7, 2021
Not a Lifetime movie
Stacey shared her experience being a three-time cancer survivor and how the recurring adversity makes her strong and propels her to take the learnings from her own experience to help others recover. She also talks about how the phrase “cancer prevention” just doesn’t sit right with her and why her cancer experience does not conform to the typical Lifetime movie plotline.
I so enjoyed talking with Stacey about her cancer journey. For someone who has had to go through the cancer experience three times already at such a young age, plus losing family members to cancer, her attitude about life is incredibly admirable. It’s also very inspiring to hear about how she channels the hardships she experienced to help others, and in turn, draws strength from giving back.
A few thoughts about our conversation:
She explained why the term cancer “prevention” can be problematic by inadvertently placing blame on survivors. I never thought about it that way before but as soon as she mentio…
playlist_add
Feb 16, 2021
Gifts of cancer (and quarantine!)
Carina and Mila, who are friends and colleagues, have supported each other on different parts of their journeys with breast cancer. We heard some common themes in their stories:
One of the big ones was the importance of putting yourself first, which they both had to learn over time when they started to feel the negative impact on their mental health. They also talked about how cultural norms sometimes created challenges for them in finding the support they needed and how it was important to recognize those barriers and find support in other ways.
The other that jumped out at me was trusting your instincts. They both gave examples of when they knew something was wrong before any official scans confirmed. This was important because they pushed forward in getting treatment rather than waiting, which would have meant more cancer growth. This was a big lesson for me personally because I am someone who has a tendency to defer to the experts which in this case, would not serve me well.
Las…
playlist_add
Jan 27, 2021
A death and dying process
I shared my experience with my dad’s death and dying process in this interview. A good friend who is an experienced medical social worker played guest host as she knew a bit about the journey I was on with my dad. Big thanks to her for listening and helping me get the story recorded. As two social workers, we did digress into some intellectualizing about the importance of having conversations with your loved ones and cultural impact on the experience of death and dying.
I talked about “professional criers” at one point in the episode. I made up that term on the spot because I’ve never actually seen this practice in the United States so not sure if there was an official term in English. Upon a quick search in the trusty Google, it appears that “professional mourners” is actually a relatively common practice in many parts of the world, and can be referred to as moirologists. The practice is meant to honor the deceased, as large crowds at the funeral are interpreted as a refl…
playlist_add
Jan 14, 2021
A bump in the road
I spoke with Jamie about her journey with breast cancer. She is truly blessed to be able to look in the rearview mirror and call the whole experience a “bump in the road.” Her story highlights how important it is to listen to your body and trust your instincts, as medical doctors can get things wrong too, and you always have to be your best advocate.
There were a few things that stood out for me. First, it’s surprising to hear how often breast cancer gets missed, given how common it is and how much the imaging technology has improved over time. It is something that I’d like to ask a breast cancer specialist one day to understand why that is the case.
Second, Jamie talked about feeling like she was “cheating on her doctor,” a sentiment not unfamiliar to many of us, especially if you are getting care at these world-renowned facilities. However, as we have heard from Jamie’s experience, it’s more important that the facility is able to provide the best care YOU need, and…
playlist_add
Jan 7, 2021
Welcome to the Talk About Cancer podcast
Hey everybody. This is Serena Hu, I'm your host for the Talk About Cancer podcast.
Cancer has had quite an impact on my life, meaning, three of my close family members have had to deal with five different types of cancer in the last decade. While I have been lucky enough to have not developed cancer myself yet, the experiences I have had as a caregiver and family member have profoundly changed the way I think about many things in life.
So I created this podcast to talk to others about their experiences with cancer because 1) I am genuinely curious about the wide-ranging perspectives and experiences there are, and 2) because I believe that telling and listening to stories helps us make sense of our experiences, and in turn, helps us heal over time.
The guests of this show candidly talk about their triumphs, heartbreaks, fears, and much much more. Like some of the guests have said to me, this is the podcast about things our doctors won’t tell us because as much as they are the exper…
playlist_add