A BIT OF GRACE
A BIT OF GRACE
Feb 12, 2021
The Value Of Women
Play • 5 min
Today I want to talk about the value of women. It's been a hot topic, really, with all of the Me Too movement and everything recently. I really want to talk about overall the fact that so many women have never realized their true value and accepted all that they bring to the table. Often we've been taught, by previous generations or in our family, how useless and worthless we are. Or that our values and our thoughts and our opinions mean nothing.
 
I mean, I'm a boomer. I grew up in the days where, my mom stayed at home and did a wonderful job feeding everyone. But really, my father ruled and he had final say and all of that, and that was what I witnessed. So the first thing I wanted to do was get away and find independence. So I did at a far too young an age. But the the thing I experienced throughout my growth in my lifetime has been so many times, like from early days, working in offices where there were lots of secretaries that were women but very few bosses and salaries. Oh, my goodness, don't even start me on that one, earning way less than men.
 
Then as we progressed through, we did try to make some changes as women. The next generation as a boomer, with our own children to try and adjust that relationship a little better. But there were things that I didn't know, I didn't have a clue. I didn't even think about, like I should have kept my own last name. My kids I thought of, it was for my kids. Well, if I have kids in the future, they're going to have these double names and it's going to sound stupid. I won't bother.
 
Yet then in finances, the thing was for the guy to be in control. We started that and wow, that was a quick wide open, what do you call it? Eyeopener with my husband. It was like, no, I've been managing my finances for way longer. I was kind of a natural, it was a natural thing for me with numbers. So, yeah, I took over that one pretty quickly.
 
But the things that we learned and the things, we were trying to be better than, every generation is right? Trying to do better than the previous generation. I'm sure my kids will do better than I ever did. We in those early days were trying to find more freedoms and adjust things. We were trying to have more balanced relationships and get the guys more involved with raising our kids.
 
The only weakness I really saw, one of the big ones, I'm sure there's lots of them you could name, was where the dads tended to want to be the kid's buddies. They didn't want to be so much the dad as they want to play with them and have fun with them in good times. But guess what? Mom has to be the enforcer, the bad cop, the one to say no. The one to, really push home, that the kids have to be responsible and have to behave themselves and not have too much expectation that everything's done for them.
 
I mean, those hilarious moments when our kids totally make us aware of our failings are really valuable, because you have to look at that and take responsibility for it. I know there's tons of places where I was wrong, I did it the wrong way. I used to be a huge perfectionist. That's how I was trained, that whatever I did, I had to do it 100 percent or it had no value. I luckily have broken that one down over the years for myself.
 
But what pieces have we thrown at our kids? What pieces were thrown at us? How many of those pieces have we recognized are valuable, and how many of those pieces are not valuable? The ones to toss out, the BS things that we've believed in the past that aren't true. The more we can accept our own value as women and see the the potential and show others gratitude for their parts. Also be glad for what we have provided, for what we can do.
 
I'm telling you, in a crisis, yeah, I would look to a woman first to see, let's just say some leadership and grit. Because we've had to have grit in so many times in our lives. The ability to stand up on our feet again after we're flattened. The ability to think in a crisis and get out of it, because we've had to so often.
 
I know that on both sides there are some obviously useless women and some obviously wonderful men. But our training, our history definitely has been showing the woman more as the anchor of a family. Well, that anchor carries a lot of weight and sometimes it gets bloody overwhelming and unrecognized and unappreciated. I'm here to say, women, you have value! You have much more value than you realize often. Thanks for listening, bye, bye.

If you want to know more about me, visit https://JuliaGrace.ca or https://JuliaGraceHealer.com
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