The Kandid Shop
The Kandid Shop
Feb 18, 2022
Living & Loving After a Narcissictic Partnership!
Play • 1 hr 2 min

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a diagnosis in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders)

NPD is considered a disorder more commonly found in men than women in which a person has:

  • An inflated sense of self-importance
  • Symptoms include an excessive need for admiration
  • Disregard for others feelings, i.e.,  lack of empathy
  • The inability to handle criticism
  • An overwhelming sense of entitlement.
  • While this disorder is overwhemingly found in men, women can be narcissist too!

Key Takeaways/Red Flags:

  • Look at the speed of the relationship. i.e. doing wayy too much, wayy too fast!
  • Love Bombing: An attempt to influence a person by grand demonstrations of attention and affection. 
  • Sob/victim stories
  • They mirror your behavior identically, i.e.,  EVERYTHINGyou like they like..
  • Be aware of the narcissist/manipulators favorite tool to keep your around:  F.O.G. - F.ear O.bligation G.uilt
  • Manipulative people are experts at gaslighting,i.e. , making you question your reality AND they're really good at getting you to ignore your intuition/gut-feelings

If you're in a toxic/abusive/narcissistic relationship and want to get out please know there’s help & hope!

  • Make a detailed plan to leave including:
    • Gathering your tribe! Get your emotional support team together!
    • Get everything in place. The moving truck, where are you going to go? How much money do you need to leave? Can you access your money?
    • Make sure you have a place to go. And your abuser doesn't know where that place is.
    • ABSOLUTLEY No contact!
    • Change your number.
    • Get off of social media.
    • Do not give them a window to anything that you are doing. As far as they are concerned, you do not exist.
    • Change all your passwords to every account, social media, email, bank accounts.. ALL OF THEM!

If you have children together:

  • Make sure you have, preemptively reached out to an attorney and know the laws, because if you go missing in the middle of the night with the children, they're going to accuse you of kidnapping and you don't want to get in any legal trouble.
  • Make sure you secure any important documents like birth certificates, social security cards, anything of value. Get ahold of it now because if they get it they will destroy anything that is important to you.
  • Be prepared to co-parent with boundaries & supervision.
  •  Document everything because documentation is power!
  • Be prepared to go through hell in the court system. Narcissistic/emotional abuse if still not widely considered a real form of abuse

The Other Side - Your Glow Up!

  • Your healing will stop the cycles attracting abusive people into your life.
  • Implement your highest level of self love; loving all of you, the good, the bad, the ugly!
  • Forgive him/her, forgive the past, forgive yourself!
  • Speak your truth without apologizing, without  guilt, without shame, without  blame and trust the process.
  • Trust yourself & your intuition!
  • Say yes when you mean, yes!
  • Say no when you mean no!
  • You can heal from these experiences, and you find true love.
  • Be kind and patient with yourself during this time
  • There's nothing that you did wrong. There's nothing wrong with you. You're not damaged. You're not broken. You simply have unhealed wounds and wounds heal with time!
  • Real love doesn't hurt...!!
  • Do not be afraid to connect and find a support system with other survivors & thrivers!
  • Loving, living and honoring your most authentic self is so important!

For help, resources and a community of healing and support, my very special guests this evening were:

Denise Kavaliauskas,Transformational Love Coach, Speaker & International Best Selling Author:




Kim Carpenter, 3rd generation Intuitive & Certified Mindset Coach:




SJ, "Le Disco Mama": Survivor, Thriver, Host of "Drama at the Disco" Podcast & Narcissistic Abuse Advocate:

Drama At The Disco- Podcast





Intro Music: "Welcome to The Kandid Shop" - Buss_TE

Outro Music: "Until it's Over" - Spring Gang


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