Swipe Circuitry: How Online Dating Trains Us To Stay Single
Play • 27 min

"Swipe circuitry" is a wildly-compelling behavior pattern sculpted by online dating. As it dangles the promise of love in front of us, swipe circuitry subtly leads us away from the very love we're seeking. In this episode, you'll learn what Swipe Circuitry is and how to get past it. This is an essential skill for anyone using swiping apps!

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Over It And On With It
Over It And On With It
Christine Hassler
EP 279: Moving from Unhealthy to Healthy Relationships with Elizabeth
This call is about breaking out of patterns and unhealthy relationships. Elizabeth calls in asking for daily mantras, actions, and tools to help her feel worthy of a loving relationship. She is struggling with enoughness. She wants to get over a “toxic” relationship from her past and truly embrace, rather than sabotage, the healthy relationship she is in now. We get to the fundamental ouch or significant life event that created the misunderstanding that perpetuates her feelings of not being enough. [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode279] The feeling of not-enoughness is a major human problem. Eventually, we will evolve out of this not-enoughness thinking and raise children differently so we all don’t have to have this major human epidemic. Know that by listening to this show, doing inner work, and feeding yourself the truth, you are doing your part to evolve human consciousness. Nothing outside of you can fulfill you and nothing external comes to you until you truly know that you are worthy and enough. That being said, we live in an interdependent world. And, although we cannot look to the outside world to make us happy, it is important to feel connected to others and attract and nurture healthy relationships, no matter where we are in our journey. The brain may confuse familiarity with love because it was wired from an early age to make love an equation. Many learn that if they act a certain way they will get love. Conditional love can feel familiar. But, worthiness is not conditional. Consider/Ask Yourself: * Do you struggle with not feeling enough? * Have you ever had a “toxic” relationship? * Do you doubt that the people in your life really love you and see you? Do you fear that you will not measure up in some way? * Is there a fierce inner critic that lives inside your head? And, even though you know you should be nicer to yourself, you can’t seem to change your self-talk? Elizabeth’s Question: Elizabeth is searching for some daily mantras or actions that will make her feel enough and worthy. Elizabeth’s Key Insights and Ahas: * She is having difficulty connecting her intellect with her heart. * She feels not enough and that her life is pointless. * She verbalizes the chaos she feels in her mind. * She was in an eight-year “toxic” relationship. * She has “love” attached to feeling a certain way. * She has trouble quieting her inner critic. How to Get Over It and On With It: * Be in the present moment and feel her feelings. * Stop and breathe when her mind starts racing. * Realize nothing is wrong with her. * Forgive herself for confusing familiarity with love. * Give her inner critic a new job description. * Practice release writing when her inner critic is bratty. Takeaways For You: * If you struggle with not-enoughness, when you feel it coming on, stop and think that you are hungry for the truth. And then, feed yourself some truth. * Watch your language and watch what you are affirming. * Slow down! Drop in and breathe. * Give things you want to shift a new job description and a new role. * If you want some additional help join my Personal Mastery Course. * Join us for the Be the Queen program. Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services. Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
33 min
Better Sex
Better Sex
Jessa Zimmerman
159: Erotic Blueprints – DD Haeg
On this episode we hear from DD Haeg who tells about the 5 Erotic Blueprints. She explains that this is a map/ language for how to turn each other on. They consist of the following: Energetics : Like to be teased, enjoy anticipation and prefer lighter touch. A sense of spaciousness appeals to them. Sensual: These blueprints indulge in all their senses be engaged. Ambience and candles work for them, and they love to be completely engaged. Sexuals: Respond to very direct sexual gestures, love nudity and quickies! Kinky: These types respond to things that are taboo and will find a power dynamic often at play. Shape Shifters: love everything! DD mentions that sexuals and energetics are the most difficult pairing one could find. Stacking Erotic Blueprints People have one main blueprint and can have elements of the others- this is called a stack. If this is new to you, DD suggests that you take her quiz to help you figure our which blueprint is your main blueprint and then understand your stack. Learning about your stack helps understand the sequence that works for you and this can really help unlock different things you may enjoy. DD discusses the shadow side of these blueprints and what the purpose of knowing your blueprint is. Ultimately this creates a deeper connection between couples. What works for each blueprint: Energetics love eye gazing and anticipation. A text message is an example of this. Sexuals love nudity so a selfie might help. Sensuals would love an essential oil bath. Kinky is very dependent on the partner you have! Shapeshifter would love all these things. Links and Resources Find out more about her Pleasure code program on her website: https://ddhaeg.com/ For my free webinar, How to Help Your Partner Want More Sex WITHOUT making them feel pressure or obligation, go here: https://www.intimacywithease.com/training Background DD Haeg is an international retreat leader, embodiment educator and certified erotic blueprint coach. She’s the founder of The Pleasure Code,™ empowering retreats and online programs that tap into the principles of permission, pleasure and play to help women shift out of overwhelm and into more juiciness and joy. Over the last two decades, DD has travelled to 35 countries, taught hundreds of yoga and meditation classes, and taken more than 1000 hours of pleasure-focused training including Orgasmic Meditation, tantra, massage therapy, and more. She holds a master’s degree in intercultural studies and currently lives in Denver with her two kiddos. More info: Book and New Course – https://sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com/ Sex Health Quiz – http://sexhealthquiz.com/ Better Sex with Jessa Zimmerman https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/ Source: https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/159-erotic-blueprints-dd-haeg
33 min
Dr. Nazanin Moali, Ph.D, Psychology of Sex | Couple Therapy | Sex Education
EP212 - Becoming an Extraordinary Lover with Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz
Welcome to episode 212 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz to the podcast. In this episode Dr. Kleinplatz talks to me about learning to be present to have more fulfilling sex, how you can learn to be more present and how this is possible for anyone to achieve. Peggy J. Kleinplatz, Ph.D., is Professor in the Faculty of Medicine and Director of the Optimal Sexual Experiences Research Team at the University of Ottawa, Canada. Please see She is a Certified Sex Therapist and Educator. Kleinplatz has edited four books including Sadomasochism: Powerful Pleasures with Charles Moser, Ph.D., M.D., Sexuality and Ageing (2015) with Walter Bouman, M.D. and notably New Directions in Sex Therapy: Innovations and Alternatives, winner of the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counsellors and Therapists (AASECT) 2013 Book Award. In 2015, Kleinplatz received the AASECT Professional Standard of Excellence Award. She is the author with A. Dana Menard, Ph.D. of Magnificent Sex: Lessons from Extraordinary Lovers (2020), winner of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research Consumer Book Award for 2021. In this episode, you will hear: * Looking at the findings of the studies Dr Kleinplatz conducted * How many people feel a poorer sex life is just a trade-off of getting older * Ways in which you can learn to fully be present during sex * The importance being present has for fulfilling sex * How did Dr Kleinplatz define what good sex is in their study? * The ways in which group therapy can help to overcome these issues * Why group therapy may work better for you rather than a one to one * Understanding that learning to be present isn’t about sexual technique * Why better sex through being present is possible for anyone to achieve Find Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz https://optimalsexualexperiences.com Quiz: What Kind of Lover are You? http://www.sexologypodcast.com/lover/ Find Dr. Moali online http://www.sexologypodcast.com Find me on social media https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care Farsi Podcast https://sexologypodcast.libsyn.com/rss If you are interested in booking a video counselling session with Dr. Moali https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio
31 min
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