Our assholes are lubed up for your furious emails. But first: check out our band new #Millennial t-shirts, brought to you by the letter "p" -- please clap. All shirts are $20 and come with one free month of Patreon! Existing Patrons get a sweet little bonus too. Pucker up. As for this week's episode:
Let's dispel this myth that Facebook friends don't know what they're doing. They know exactly what they're doing. And they need to fucking stop. Hidden from the Headlines takes us to a distant land where being gay-- or reincarnated-- is banned from television and all movies are cut down to approximately 5 seconds. A new SCOTUS ruling decides to treat gay couples like real people, JP Morgan tells fossil fuels where they can stick it, we all contemplate moving to Canada, and J.K. Rowling comes under fire for appropriating Native American culture. All in this installment of Quickfire News. Embark with us on a main discussion about generational shifts toward liberalism. How will the next lineup of crotch dropplings be even more socially progressive? How will we cope with their superiority? Can you speak up? Get off my lawn. Surprise, bitch! welcomes a voicemail box to the show.
And in this week's After Dark:
On a scale of 1 to Literally Everyone, how many people would have watched Fox's proposed Trump v. Sanders debate? Another main discussion pulls open our financial wounds and peers inside. Is it true what they say about Millennials' dire financial state? What is this new hipster word "savings"? Watch the whole show unravel into a slew of personal tales about Laura's drinking habits, which can summarized only as "majestic."