Impolite Company
Impolite Company, LLC
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A podcast hosted by nationally touring comedian, Chris Cyr. Chris speaks about everything from politics to pop culture. Completely unfiltered and probably mostly wrong, each episode is a stream of consciousness ride from point A to point B with infinite digressions in between.
Chris's album, "Adult Child of Child Parents" is available through Helium Records, and can be streamed or purchased wherever you listen to comedy. Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
Available episodes
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Oldest first
Jun 22, 2023
Chris Fixes Student Loans (And Insults Half of America, Probably) - Impolite Company 06152023
Impolite Company host, Chris Cyr, meant to talk about multiple subjects, but got carried away talking about how he'd fix the student loan crisis, while also talking about the idiotic notion of fairness that too many people in this country cling to as the support for every argument they have about why they're better than everyone else. This episode is probably sponsored, by Adderall whether they want to or not.
Our theme music is by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their music on Amazon and wherever else to you listen to good stuff.
Find out more info about Chris Cyr, including links to his album, at http://www.christophercyr.com
Interesting Links (That agree and disagree with Chris):
Joe Manchin Hates You Politico - Joe Manchin's Stand Against Cancelling Student Debt https://www.politico.com/news/2021/02/04/manchin-student-debt-cancel-466497
Elizabeth Warren Likes You But NYT Gotta NYT, AMIRITE? The New York Times - Elizabeth Warren Wants to Cancel Student Debt. Critics Wonder If That's the Right Solution https://www.nytimes.com/2021/02/05/business/elizabeth-warren-student-loans.html
This Bankruptcy Thing Is Bi Syracuse.com - Rep. John Katko Introduces Bipartisan Bill to Allow Student Loans To Be Discharged In Bankruptcy https://www.syracuse.com/politics/2021/03/rep-john-katko-introduces-bipartisan-bill-to-allow-student-loans-to-be-discharged-in-bankruptcy.html
Ol' "Schools Need Guns 'Cuz Bears" DeVos Thinks A Student Loan Is Forever Inside Higher Ed - DeVos Seeks to Restrict Loan Relief https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2018/12/19/devos-seeks-restrict-loan-relief
I'm Not The Only One Who Thinks Tax Exemption For All These Schools Is Sketch As Hell The Washington Post - Ron Wyden: Tax College Endowments to Help Students https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2020/10/20/ron-wyden-tax-college-endowments-help-students/
But Some People Just Love That Government Teat The Hill - GOP Rep: Don't Remove Nonprofit Status of Colleges https://thehill.com/homenews/house/320618-gop-rep-dont-remove-nonprofit-status-of-colleges
I'm Not Really A Bernie Fan Anymore, But It Feels Obligatory to Include Him The Wall Street Journal - Bernie Sanders: Abolish the Student-Loan Debt https://www.wsj.com/articles/bernie-sanders-abolish-the-student-loan-debt-11622755340
The Only Foxx You Should Care About Is Red Foxx U.S. News - Virginia Foxx: The Federal Student Loan Program Should Be Reformed, Not Eliminated https://www.usnews.com/opinion/articles/2017-02-27/virginia-foxx-the-federal-student-loan-program-should-be-reformed-not-eliminated
Llamar Alexander...Sigh...I Can't Even Think Of Anything Interesting To Say About Llamar Alexander, But Here's His Feelings (Empasis on the Word "Feelings") On Any Kind Of Qualifying Criteria U.S. Senate Committee on Health, Education, Labor & Pensions - Prepared Remarks of Senator Lamar Alexander (R-Tenn.) https://www.help.senate.gov/ranking/newsroom/press/alexander-continues-push-for-lower-college-costs --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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May 4, 2023
Actual Ketamine and Joe Biden - Impolite Company 05052023
In this episode of Impolite Company, Chris reacts to completely unsurprising new from the political world this week about Joe Biden. Amazon currently has more than 500 books on SLOT MACHINE STRATEGY available for digital download. Too much information about how slot machines work. Americans don't actually value hard work, they value striking it rich. We've failed the experiment of legal pot and it's evident in how we smell. ACTUAL Ketamine, delivered directly to your home. Ketamine!
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Apr 3, 2023
Twenty Four Hours - Impolite Company 04032023
The Twenty Four hour culture is going extinct, and nowhere is that more evident than the drive through line of your local Taco Bell. The combination of COVID, the rise of the gig (scam) economy, and the Taco Bell's general terribleness as an employer, highlight the problems every late night business is facing. Chris offers a solution. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Mar 7, 2022
The Best of Impolite Company: War Pigs
As spring springs, host Chris Cyr is surprised to have to be talking about war. There probably won't be a massive nuclear launch. The Sopranos make for good analogies for talking about global politics. Chris proves he owns the CIA Fact Book for the current year. If there was an attack, who'd be left in America? The GOP would ruin the plot of the movie Red Dawn by throwing a parade for the Russian invaders. Josh Hawley is still terrible and out of touch. Fat rich kids are more confident than you'd think. Do they still make mouse pads?
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Jul 16, 2021
The Best of Impolite Company: Bone and Cone
We are a culture full of morons who buy exploding Teslas, refuse lifesaving vaccines, think eating a Kit Kat the "wrong way" is a punchable offense, and refuse to zipper merge because someone else might get somewhere 10 seconds before us. Also, Chris bought a new car and reflects on how it is impossible for car dealers to make that transaction simple.
It's a lot of exposition disguised as plot on the latest episode of Impolite Company!
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their albums, "From Which I Came," and their newest release "Where I'm At" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform. Support independent artists!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Mar 24, 2021
The Best of Impolite Company: Cinnamon Toast Shrimp and the Tyranny of Facebook Memories
Why are you letting Zuckerberg attack your psyche each morning by pelting you with memories of the past year? Isn't there a rule against a band playing Pearl Jam's "Black" at a paid gig? Should potential editors of magazines really be held liable for things they Tweeted in high school? And can you even comprehend the spiritual and emotional depths of the existential crisis created when America's greatest comfort food can't be trusted?
Have fun with the latest edition of Impolite Company!
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their albums, "From Which I Came," and their newest release "Where I'm At" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform.
Support independent artists!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Mar 2, 2021
The Best of Impolite Company: A Caveman Incel Sucking a Goat Boob
In this episode of Impolite Company, Chris compares CPAC to way better conventions he's attended. Apparently, the CPAC costumes are way worse. He wonders if Reagan and Rush Limbaugh are burning in Hell together. Also, an explanation for how drinking milk ever became a thing.
Have fun with the latest edition of Impolite Company!
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their albums, "From Which I Came," and their newest release "Where I'm At" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform. Support independent artists!
Follow Chris on Instagram where he's @chrisdcyr, and on Facebook. Enjoy this episode of Impolite Company
Listen at the link below, or on Spotify, iTunes, Google Play, and whatever other platform you're into. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Feb 8, 2021
The Best of Impolite Company: You Don’t Smash A Lot Of Guitars In Adult Contemporary
The pandemic continues, but that doesn't stop a significant part of the internet from being outraged by Phoebe Bridgers' appearance on SNL. Impolite host, Chris Cyr, wonders what those people would do if they saw someone bite the head off of a bat? The cowardice of a former president to not show up for a battle he doesn't even have the chance of losing. Should we have had Super Bowl commercials? And, why do people only pay it forward in the line of Starbucks and not in more useful places?
Have fun with the latest edition of Impolite Company!
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their albums, "From Which I Came," and their newest release "Where I'm At" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform. Support independent artists!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Feb 3, 2021
The Best of Impolite Company: Oops! That'd Be Authoritarianism!
On this Impolite Company, in the course of talking about the crazy blonde congresswoman who thinks Pizzagate was real, Chris wonders if there's a way for society to objectively identify people too stupid to be allowed to have opinions, and then allow the state to intercede and make all decisions for that objectively stupid person. You know. Basically fascism. Also, Butch Bowers, attorney at law and muscle car salesman.
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their albums, "From Which I Came," and their newest release "Where I'm At" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform. Support independent artists!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Jan 27, 2021
The Best of Impolite Company: What Do People Even Talk About These Days
On the agenda are American politics and the failed right wing insurrection. He wonders why conservatives of different stripes will hug each other tightly regardless of how much they disagree, whereas liberals and progressives will re-enact the fight scene from Michal Jackson's "Beat It" video over the slightest difference. Hallmark donated $11,000 to Josh Hawley's election campaign. And, people who started relationships and moved in together before the pandemic hit might be the true heroes of 2020.
As always, a million other topics on tens of other tangents. Happy new year, it's Impolite Company.
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their albums, "From Which I Came," and their newest release "Where I'm At" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform.
Support independent artists!
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Nov 14, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - A Roman Wilderness of Pain
Chris is alone in his hotel in Vegas. Which he admits, feels weird. He's there competing in the World Series of Comedy (He did not win.) He also just doesn't get Vegas. Maybe people who love Vegas should just try harder to not be boring at home? There's some talk of a time machine. Chris describes the crowd reaction at the show, flying in coach, and how nice airports are overall.
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their albums, "From Which I Came," and their newest release "Where I'm At" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform. Support independent artists!
Enjoy this episode of Impolite Company
Listen at the link below, or on Spotify, iTunes, Google Play, and whatever other platform you're into. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Oct 25, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - Unwearied Still, Lover by Lover Paddle in the Cold
Mollie Amburgey joins host Chris Cyr on Impolite Company for this episode's edition of "Who's Effing?". But first, a sketch about hunting a mythical creature we keep hearing about on CNN.
Keep up with Mollie through her podcast, "Casually Mollie" available wherever you get your podcasts.
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their album, "From Which I Came" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform.
Enjoy this episode of Impolite Company
Listen at the link below, or on Spotify, iTunes, Google Play, and whatever other platform you're into. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Oct 9, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - The Shrunk Earth Shall Shudder By
A quick update on some local shows in the St. Louis area. Host, Chris Cyr, wonders if political debates are even worth the time. And, St. Louis comic, Justin Luke, joins us for "Who's Effing?" with an interview recorded back in May.
Our theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their album, "From Which I Came" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform.
Enjoy this new episode of Impolite Company
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Jun 26, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - Between the Conception and the Creation
From our series of interviews recorded during quarantine, St. Louis comic, Kate Barton is the guest during our new favorite segment, "Who's Fucking?" Chris and Kate talk about cucumber sandwiches, spittle, and elevators. During the intro, Chris gives some advice on how to score free stuff from a hospital.
Follow Kate on Twitter and Instagram.
Our new theme song was written and produced by Lyfestile and Kenautis Smith. Check out their album, "From Which I Came" on Spotify, Apple Music, or every other platform.
Enjoy this new episode of Impolite Company --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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May 23, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days Of Pestilence - Mad Eyed From Stating The Obvious
Chris interviews Ellen Doyle, a traveling comic who's sheltering in Pennsylvania. The two discuss everything from dating apps, to the best review Ellen's ever received from an audience member. Also, CSI: Madea. Enjoy this new episode of Impolite Company.
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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May 15, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - The Broken Jaw Of Our Lost Kingdoms
It's one of those ranty kind of nights where Chris watched too much CNN. The target of his ire? Armed protesters in Michigan and elsewhere, the militia guarding an angry barber, pickup driving rednecks who murdered a man, and a rampaging herd of 200 goats.
Enjoy this new episode of Impolite Company. Or don't. We're not cops.
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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May 5, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - I Hold With Those Who Favor Fire
A dead cat. Survivalists. Phone sex. Not all part of the same story. Today's quarantine episode of Impolite Company has something for everyone.
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Apr 25, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Money Laundering and Blood Alley
In this episode of Impolite Company from March 19, 2019, Chris gives step by step money laundering instructions for your pot dispensary, since banks are reluctant to open accounts for your new business. The real purpose of the puzzles boxes from Hellraiser is way dirtier than you thought. Patchouli should go away. And what's up with Blood Alley? March of 2019
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Apr 17, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - Coffins Stood Round Like Open Presses
From the stasis of quarantine, Chris Cyr gives you the top 10 ways you can prove yourself useful to future aliens who happen to thaw you out in hopes of learning something about the human race. Also, buy a shop vac.
It's Impolite Company time!
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Apr 6, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - Terror In A Handful Of Dust
#QuarantineLife continues as Chris mourns the loss of a staple of our existence, says good riddance to a terrible food vending method, and lets you know that it's perfectly okay to not learn a new skill right now. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Apr 4, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: The McDonald's Lady
Enjoy this classic Impolite episode where Chris wonders why the woman at McDonald's quit mid-order. Listeners give some of their worst work experiences.
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Mar 25, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - Slouching Towards Bethlehem
We're homing in on the right settings for this home podcasting thing during quarantine. Hopefully the days of studio casting will be upon us before too long.
Chris talks about working from home, some weird conspiracy, and then tells another of his favorite "longest jokes(?) ever!" --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Mar 23, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - Look Upon My Works and Despair
Kenny Rogers is dead. That's not cool. Chris recalls some inappropriate childhood moments, along with some sweet moments involving "The Gambler." Who bought all of the Nintendo Switches? St. Louis locks down at 6:00 p.m. on Monday 3/23/2020.
Impolite Company is Quarantined! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Mar 20, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence - Ring Around The Rosies
The semi-quarantine continues as Chris talks about praying to both Prince and Les Paul, why old people love him, and licking people with face masks? We don't know. He just talks and weird stuff comes out. If you know, then you know. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Mar 19, 2020
The Best of Impolite Company: Days of Pestilence
The day the world shut down, Chris Cyr returns to the Impolite Company microphone, recording from the dining room table as he, and the rest of America, have been told to stay indoors and self isolate in order to not bring about an apocalypse. The sound you hear in the background might be the refrigerator, or it might be the hooves of the fourth horseman running down Route 66.
Also, a discussion of ninja smoke bombs. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Jun 19, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: New Year's Summer Day
Chris makes the case for moving New Year's Day to the summer. He rants about a lot of stuff. The late night crowd at his show this weekend hated him, which was awesome. One more call for a revolution.
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May 29, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: L'il Wu Tang Clan
Chris gives away three million dollar ideas on today's episode. The best of which is a new children's series featuring the remaining members of the Wu Tang Clan. He recounts his memorial day weekend, and complains about a car that needs to be retired.
Welcome to Impolite Company.
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May 15, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Hugh Jackman's Claws Are Real
Chris discusses Game of Thrones, insomnia, conspiracies, LSD, and good Christian values.
Impolite Company is here to remind you, #NoGodsNoMasters
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May 8, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Your Mom's Really Into Sepultura
Back from his trip to New York, Chris catches up with the audience, discusses NYC, Game of Thrones, Avengers, Illinois's recreational marijuana effort, and wants to know "Are we recording?"
Welcome to Impolite Company!
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Apr 16, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: No One Is Ready
Chris wonders if he's ready to start the show. He can't work the coffeemaker in the studio. He delivers a special pep talk for you about accomplishing your dreams. RIP Notre Dame cathedral.
It's #NoGodsNoMastersNoChurches on today's Impolite Company!
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Apr 9, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Bird Wars
Chris is under siege from a pigeon who's nesting on his front porch. Will he survive this aggression? Who knows? Exploding soup cans, weird house selling superstitions, and other topics all get blown off so he can spend more time on the bird.
Listen to Impolite Company!
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Apr 4, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Singing in the Reign of Blood
Chris sings most of today's episode. We don't mean that he sings on today's show, we mean he SINGS THE DAMN SHOW. He assures us there were no drugs involved. Most of the show involves, Joe Biden, and how "Biden: The Musical" is not going to be made. He didn't mean for that to happen, but it did. We also briefly discussed new superhero trailers, but somehow made it back to Biden.
The hour went by really fast. That's Impolite Company for you.
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Mar 28, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: The Bustelo Missile Crisis
Do you have a "Go Bag?" What is the weird thing people are going to find when you die, a coffee can full of your fingernail clippings? R.I.P. coffee cans, in this age of plastic. Donald trump has an army of meth heads to protect him if he loses the next election. Sam Elliot.
It's time for Impolite Company!
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Mar 26, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: So I Bought A Hand Pie
It's an abbreviated show today since Chris overslept. But, it's a perfect time to let you know about the recent change at Chris's local doughnut shop. The Mueller report is completed, and even though no one's read it, everyone's sure it supports their argument. Chris worries that the secret service will misinterpret his intentions.
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Mar 21, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Boycott Fish Fries
Chris Cyr wonders why liberals are starting to eat at ChicFillA again. For that matter, why are they spending money on fish fries at churches across the country? Also, a completely made up survey about the end of the world.
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Mar 19, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: You Have To Turn The Box On
Did you know that public transportation runs late as part of an organized conspiracy to increase the rate of fatal pneumonia in poor people? We did.
Chris Cyr informs you on today's Impolite Company!
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Mar 14, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Tweeting From the End of the World
Chris describes his experience with a sensory deprivation tank, wonders why his bank doesn't accept cash half the time, Panda Express people are loud, and how did we survive Facebook being down?
Get on Twitter and Get Ready for Today's Impolite Company!
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Feb 20, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: John Wayne and Dick Pics
All we're saying is that if you're a dude and your buddy says "Hey, check this out!" you let him send you a pic. Also, who, other than everyone, John Wayne was a racist homophobe? Toilet bowls full of foam. Snowstorms that may or may not come. And of course, a rant about social media.
It's a full menu from Impolite Company!
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Feb 14, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Valentine's Day Massacre
Happy Valentine's Day from Impolite Company.
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Feb 12, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Process Improvement for Cannibals
Yeah, we don't even know where to begin. A recent gig in rural Illinois has Chris concerned about vampires and cannibals. He has tips for both.
It's a weird episode of Impolite Company!
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Feb 9, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: I Was Basically Oliver Twist
Chris is certain he's a city kid through and through. He recounts a time his car was broken into and reveals that he's much more efficient at breaking into cars, but doesn't explain how he knows that. Also, doughnuts.
It's a deep dive on today's Impolite Company.
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Feb 6, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Secrets, Lies, and Oprah
We're not sure if Chris is ranting about Donald Trump and keeps getting distracted by Liam Neeson, or if he's ranting about Liam Neeson and keeps getting distracted by Donald Trump. But, we can all agree that it'd have been a different week if Liam had made his confession to Oprah, instead of to the Independent.
Strap one on for today's Impolite Company!
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Feb 1, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Saturday Mornings Were Better In The 80s
It's been a year! Chris discusses personal and creative growth, and tells a few jokes he wrote in his first year of comedy. The new DCU shows are fun. Also, if you purposefully use the wrong pronoun to address a person, you're an a-hole. That's a pretty non-controversial opinion he pretends is a hot take. Don't be an a-hole.
It's Impolite Company!
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Jan 27, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: The Art of the Deal
The government shut down is over and Chris wonders if this is the type of negotiating we can expect from the POTUS when he protects US interests with North Korea. Also, don't use duct tape for sex play, addresses the "why are you politicial?" question, and DON'T DUMP OUT COFFEE!!! For Christ's sake people, it's coffee.
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Jan 15, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Cheeseburger in Paradise
A veritable buffet of American exceptionalism was bestowed upon the Clemson Tigers yesterday. Let's talk about it. Also, it snowed in St. Louis. Need lawn furniture?
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Jan 9, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: The Plural of Moose is Moose
Chris lists a number of things you could have done last night instead of watching Donald Trump's speech. It's a long list. The plural of "moose" is "moose." Right? The Chrysler Building is for sale.
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Jan 8, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Till the Wheels Fall Off
Chris spends a lot of time talking about flat tires, which somehow still brings up the subjects of donuts. Do people pick up escorts at the front door? Does the government shutdown mean we can act crazy on mass transit now? And it's interesting that Trump didn't try making his little speech during the national championship game last night.
Also, he's not even allowed to commit murder. So, relax.
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Jan 3, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: Space Birthdays Are Going To Be Sad
Chris discusses the news that the Chinese government launched a lunar rover on the far side of the Earth's moon. Completely ignoring recent achievements by the U.S. space program, Chris angrily screams into the abyss about why we don't have an Auntie Anne's Pretzels at Lagrange 5 to serve colonists on their way to new worlds.
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Jan 2, 2019
The Best of Impolite Company: June 21 is the New January 1
It's a new year, but what does that really mean? How we measure time is a construct created by men who wanted a way to chart their moment by moment progress towards their graves. Also, don't hijack trains.
We swear it all ties together, maybe. Enjoy today's Impolite Company!
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Dec 18, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: I Don't Know It's Christmas
Chris bemoans the fact that it doesn't feel like Christmas, gives advice to long haul drivers tempted to buy imitation amphetamines, makes a suggestion about international nuclear proliferation that may be illegal, and more!
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Dec 11, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Be An Axe Murderer For Good
Chris gives you advice for your annual performance review, surviving toxic holiday culture in your corporate job, and if you're going to be an axe murderer, choose your victims wisely.
Die Hard is a Christmas Movie.
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Dec 4, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: The Clanger!
Chris can't handle the Salvation Army bell ringers who block the ingress to every retail establishment he wants to go to this time of year. He spends a good part of the episode airing his grievances.
George H.W. Bush died this week. The general feeling ranges from "SAD" to "MEH". Chris points out that no president gets into heaven, and the Prince always had more power than the sitting president.
It's national cookie day. Eff cookies.
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Nov 29, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: The Truth About Rudolph
Chris gives a different take on Christmas classics like Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, and How The Grinch Stole Christmas. He also made the mistake of listening to Christmas music on the way into the studio this morning.
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Nov 28, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Broke Wednesday
Chris knows he needs a commercial, but isn't sure about what format to use. He makes sure you know how to celebrate the first Wednesday after Thanksgiving, more commonly known as Broke Wednesday. Chris also worries that he may get food poisoning.
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Nov 27, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: The Unavoidable Problem of Pie
Chris discusses the unavoidable problem of pie, the lessons of Creed 2, Christmas Trees, and kids.
Get back into the swing of things with today's Impolite Company.
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Nov 8, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: What In The Hell Is Wrong With You, Missouri?
Cold bubbly water poured into your crotch will wake you up quite well. Chris shares this and other secrets. He also wants to know, what the hell is wrong with you, Missouri?
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Nov 6, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: F**king Vote
Chris has election advice for Missouri voters. Mostly, that advice is to not let Josh Hawley make it to the U.S. Senate. Seriously, Josh Hawley looks like he'd fuck cancer victims, in every sense of the word. Don't vote for him.
Seriously. Don't fucking vote for that guy.
Also, demons. We talk about demons, and rituals, and food, maybe? It got a little hazy at one point. Chris mispronounced Gillespie and Peyton cracked up.
Hawley can text in an opposing opinion if he wants. We dare him.
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Oct 31, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Halloween!
It's Halloween! Draw your pentagrams, like your black candles, put on your robes, and place an Almond Joy in the center of the summoning circle for our Dark Lord to snack on after he appears. Chris has thoughts on this day. Let's see if he survives this episode of Impolite Company!
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Oct 30, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: No, You Can't Have A Pet Pikachu
Chris discusses why drunk people shouldn't talk to the musician on stage. There's a discussion about weddings, why the government won't let you have a pokemon, and other topics. It's a fun ride on today's Impolite Company.
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Oct 25, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: You Can Hurt Trump, But Don't Touch DeNiro
Yesterday, a bunch of suspicious packages were mailed to the offices of various people and institutions referred to as "enemies of the people" and other insults by the President of the United States. That was bad. Today one of those packages was received by Robert DeNiro. Chris lets these terrorists, whoever they are, Al Queda or Al Smith, know that they've gone too far. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/impolite-company/support
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Oct 24, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Did Not Win The Lottery
Chris did not win the big ass lottery drawing last night. He didn't even buy a ticket. But he has a plan to get rich anyway.
Unrelated fact: Did you know that it's practically impossible to prosecute 100 people for the same murder?
Other unrelated fact: Do you know that $1.7 billion divided by 100 is still a really big number?
Just kidding...
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Oct 23, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: I Ain't Afraid Of No Ghost
Chris talks about horror movies and relates them to the real world. The kind of people who live in Newtown, would definitely build their homes on a cursed cemetery. Possessed children just need to be punched in the face. Send Seal Team 6 after Michael Meyers. There a smorgasbord of information.
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Oct 17, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Let Eli Roth Teach Your Kids
On today's Impolite Company, Chris discusses his disappointment in finding a seed in a Clementine this morning. He also thinks your kids would learn more from watching The Devil's Rejects than they'll learn from Chronicles of Narnia. Did your kid go Eli Roth on a bully? Then this episode is for you.
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Oct 16, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Lee Greenwood is a Chump
That idiotic Proud To Be An American (aka "God Bless The USA) is a terrible song. It's even worse when sung by drunk white people at a karaoke bar. Lee Greenwood is a chump. It's impolite Company with Chris Cyr.
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Oct 11, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Frack Branson
Chris doesn't think Branson needs state money to promote tourism. The governor needs to up his grammar game. Are we done with problematic material in general? Free speech is boring.
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Oct 9, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Donut Get It Twisted
Enough about bagels. Chris helps you choose the right donut order and tells you what your donut choices say about you. The jackbooted thugs of the New World Order make an appearance.
Enjoy today's Impolite Company!
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Oct 2, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Disappointingly Not The Anti-Christ
It's October! Chris is going to talk about horror movies. Today, he talks more about the time he was convinced he was the anti-Christ after his dad let him watch The Omen. Brett Kavanaugh is a (our legal department demands we add the word "probably" here) a rapist. Chris emceed an Oktoberfest even and recaps his weekend at The Funny Bone in St. Louis.
He also outlines the perfect dozen bagels to order for your office food day!
He's not dead.
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Jun 6, 2018
The Best of Impolite Company: Summer's Here
For a lot of kids, school's out for the summer. Chris remembers the last day of school, getting your yearbook signed, fighting in the streets, swimming pools...
It's your basic summer vacation themed coming of age film. Also, disease vectors.
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