Today Stephan B. Poulter, Ph.D. and Charles kick off March talking about shame and better sex for men. This month we’ll have several guests on the podcast who will share their personal and/or professional experience encountering shame and sexuality and a bit of how they’ve helped others work through painful processes or how they’ve done so for themselves.
When it comes to women and sex, we men often think we know more than we actually do about women’s pleasure. We can sometimes give in to our ego. We can be close-minded and display overt or subtle denial and disdain towards our own partners when we hear them express what creates pleasurable sexual experiences for them.
According to Dr. Poulter, this can often be the result of deeply engrained shame-filled emotions and thoughts, many of which have been transferred to us first by family and friends throughout our childhood and during our maturation processes and later reinforced by music and other forms of media.
The following 12 suggestions have been presented in this podcast to help open-minded guys increase sexual gratification with their partners:
• Talk About Sex
• Be Present
• Set The Scene
• Put Your Phones Down
• Don’t Always Focus On The End-Zone
• Take Your Time
• Practice Whole Body Adoration
• Talking During Sex Isn’t Bad/Be Expressive Before, During & After Sex
• Use Your Hands...A LOT!!!
• Practice “eye-gazing”
If you find yourself struggling to accomplish any of these suggestions with your partner, you may want to check out what qualified, licensed professionals in the field of sex therapy have to say. Or, you may want to reach out to a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist(CSAT) in your area for a consultation.
Much of what Charles and Dr. Poulter discussed today is also discussed, in part, due to Dr. Poulter’s fabulous book, “The Shame Factor: Heal Your Deepest Fears and Set Yourself Free”. You may purchase at https://www.amazon.com/Shame-Factor-Deepest-Fears-Yourself/dp/1633885224
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