Allyship is a Verb
Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them)
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People want to do better, but they don’t always know how. Allyship is a Verb is a 3x award-nominated podcast featuring conversations with LGBTQ+ community members of various lived experiences and backgrounds who share their stories and an allyship tip. The host is a silly, warm human who offers self-reflection questions and voiceovers to help deepen the learning for listeners. The host is Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them), who has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and social work. Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
Available episodes
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Nov 21, 2023
Queering weddings and gender expression feat. Tonya
📺 Watch the recording for PFLAG Los Angeles Presents: Trans and Nonbinary Joy ✨
☎️ Call the new QTP Loveline to get various LGBTQ+ affirmations and encouragement
This week, Tonya (she/they) shares how questioning their gender 3-5 years ago has taken them on a journey, including navigating decisions about pronouns, make-up, hair length, and clothing. In this episode, you will learn 1. Why they hired a wedding planner who has experience with queer weddings, among other intentional decisions they've been working through 2. What a previous workplace did that was a positive change for the LGBTQ+ community at large 3. How, surprisingly, a trip to a coffee shop in a small town in Texas recently made them feel seen
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/tonya
Host Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them), has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and technology. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions based on the guests' unique intersecting identities. You can follow Charlie on Instagram, LinkedIn, and Substack. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Nov 20, 2023
From code switching to House Hunters feat. Patrick Ladonis
Watch the recording for PFLAG Los Angeles Presents: Trans and Nonbinary Joy ✨
This week, Patrick Ladonis (he/him) shares how he shifted from fear to freedom when he came out to over 400 people at the premiere of his web series SCALES. In this episode, you will learn 1. How stressful it was to have people pry into his personal life before he felt comfortable talking about his now husband in the workplace 2. What CEOs and senior leadership can do to show up for employees, especially for shifting to an inclusive culture 3. How creating his web series changed him by building up his confidence, and he hopes future generations will discover it
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/patrick-ladonis
Host Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them), has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and technology. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions based on the guests' unique intersecting identities. You can follow Charlie on Instagram, LinkedIn, and Substack. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Oct 24, 2023
How to mess up a health checkup feat. Tiffany Rossdale
This week, Tiffany Rossdale (she/her) shares about being a transgender woman and transformational life coach who emigrated from Manila, Philippines, to Tokyo, Japan. In this episode, you will learn 1. Why she’s passionate about legal reform for Japan’s LGBTQ+ community and advocacy, taking inspiration from other transgender actors and activists like Laverne Cox and Angelica Ross 2. How she has been navigating the complexities of dating as a transgender woman, including safety considerations 3. What healthcare providers can do to serve transgender and nonbinary patients better.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/tiffany-rossdale/
Host Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them), has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and technology. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities. You can follow Charlie on Instagram, LinkedIn, and Substack. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Oct 10, 2023
WAIT, why am I talking? feat. Mark S. King
This week, Mark S. King (he/him) shares how the landscape of HIV/AIDS has changed over the years since the AIDS crisis of the 80s and what it's been like for him, having lived with HIV for four decades. In this episode, you will learn 1. Why is it essential to fight against HIV criminalization, especially considering the injustices and stigma it perpetuates, particularly when it's used vindictively in personal disputes and can lead to unjust labeling as sexual predators 2. How not having access to basic services like transportation can impact our health and health outcomes 3. How he initially felt about folks making comparisons between the AIDS crisis and COVID-19 and what he thinks now
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/mark-s-king
Host Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them), has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and technology. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities. You can follow Charlie on Instagram, LinkedIn, and Substack. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Sep 26, 2023
Turning 36: A special birthday episode feat. Charlie Ocean
This week, Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them), is interviewed by various friends to celebrate turning 36 on September 17th, 2023! 🥳 In this episode, you will learn 1. Why they changed their name to Charlie Ocean from Chris Angel Murphy and some of what went into that decision 2. What some of their favorite books, shows, movies, and memes are 3. How to talk about someone who changed their name or pronouns with someone who doesn't know
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/charlie-ocean/
Host Charlie Ocean, MSW (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and technology. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities. You can follow Charlie on Instagram, LinkedIn, and Substack. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Sep 12, 2023
Being trans and nonbinary in the workplace feat. Zoa Glows
This week, Zoa Glows (they/she) returns from the first season to share how they navigate the workplace as a trans and nonbinary person, and what they wish workplaces would do to make it safer and easier. In this episode, you will learn 1. Why she decided to leave professional performing 2. What hate comments do to their spirit, and how their reactions to it have evolved over time (plus what those of us who follow Zoa on social can do to support them) 3. How some gendered terms may feel good to her in specific situations
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/zoa-glows-2023-update
Host Charlie Ocean (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities. You can follow them on Instagram, LinkedIn, and Substack. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Aug 29, 2023
Embracing softness in a capitalist hellscape feat. MJ Jupitus
This week, MJ Jupitus (they/them) shares about how they navigate language as a nonbinary person, including being their wife's wife, but not their parent's daughter. In this episode, you will learn 1. Why they call themselves a movement specialist instead of a physical trainer or physical therapist 2. What softness means to them physically and mentally 3. How we may have "queer posture" and what it is
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/mj-jupitus/
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Aug 15, 2023
Living authentically and forging family harmony feat. Jack Lam
* Please consider donating $15 to the Indiegogo campaign to help Chris Angel celebrate their 15-year anniversary of taking testosterone; there are only six days left!
* If Chris Angel didn't scare you away with their bizarre personals ad for Kaitlyn, check them out on Instagram
This week, Jack Lam (they/them) discusses how being a Malaysian Chinese immigrant has impacted them, including struggling to release shame and fear so they could name and embrace their genderqueer identity after coming to the United States. In this episode, you will learn 1. How their gender expression becomes a powerful tool for visibility 2. When allyship begins to become performative and how to avoid it 3. Why we need to normalize talking about mental health and getting support
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/jack-lam/
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Aug 1, 2023
What should LGBTQ+ flags look like? feat. Lena Dirscherl
* The Queer Trans Project is a black-led and trans-led organization that offers build-a-queer kits and flight assistance. They need to raise $50K by September! Thanks to Sam Marion for helping me to amplify The Queer Trans Project’s great work.
* Want to bring Allyship is a Verb to your workplace or group? Get a shoutout? Check out our Indiegogo campaign, including lots of other great perks!
* New merch drop 👀 with another line coming soon 👕
* Major thanks to Kit Ballum Cohen (they/them/kit), a nonbinary designer, artist, and parent who designed the newest podcast cover. Follow + check out their work at https://linktr.ee/itskit
To kick off season three, Lena Dirscherl (they/them) returns to discuss the value of having recognizable LGBTQ+ flags with intentional design. In this episode, you will learn 1. What goes into sensitivity reading, including promoting authentic representation, avoiding harmful tropes, and challenging unconscious bias. 2. Where they have been finding and connecting with the polyamory community. 3. How technology fatigue can negatively impact LGBTQ+ entrepreneurs and artists.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/lena-dirscherl-2023-update
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Jul 25, 2023
You go, Indiegogo!
You go, Indiegogo! Season three is around the corner, and we have a quick announcement... we've launched an Indiegogo campaign with some sweet perks! At the time of writing this, we're also an Indiegogo Team Favorite :) :) :)
Host Chris Angel ("Well, hello there!") needs your help to make this the best season yet. By contributing, you're helping to fund season three production costs. We'd also like to publish allyship e-books, have traveling audio exhibits, and so much more. You'll find yourself saying, "I've never known a podcast to have a [top secret idea] before!" I know, right?!
As an indie-produced podcast, we truly can't do this without you <3
We'd also love to offer a heartfelt OHMYGOSHTHANKYOUSOMUCH to those who have supported us over the years!!! Thanks to your contributions, we hired an illustrator this season to give us an incredible new podcast cover, which is already on some merch (with another design on the way soon). Big shoutout to nonbinary designer Kit Ballum Cohen!
Anything, even $5, helps us get closer to our goal of $5,000 to make these wild ideas a reality. Thanks for your support!
PS - If someone you know works for a company or organization that values diversity and inclusion, please consider forwarding the campaign to them. They may be interested in becoming a sponsor or hiring Chris Angel for a deeply discounted training session on allyship! https://igg.me/at/allyship-is-a-verb
See you VERY SOON on August 1st for the start of season three :) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Jun 20, 2023
The History of Black HIV in the South with hosts Anna DeShawn and Duane Cramer
Hopefully a future Allyship is a Verb guest, Anna DeShawn (she/her), created a mini-series called Black HIV in the South: How Did We Get Here? This is Episode 1 of 4. Please check out all of Anna's work with E3 Radio, LLC and The Qube (explained more in her bio further below). I had the extreme privilege of being introduced to Anna through The Ambies, as we were nominated in the same category! We met in Vegas at the award ceremony, and I cried tears of joy when she won Best DIY Podcast. Thank you for allowing me to amplify your top-notch work! - Chris Angel (they/them)
The History of Black HIV in the South
Go on a journey with Anna DeShawn to explore the history, economics, and culture of HIV/AIDS in the Black community. Through interviews and personal stories, Anna and her co-host, Duane Cramer, explore the shame, stigma, and solutions.
In this episode, Anna and Duane share their personal connections to the work and the history of HIV/AIDS in the Black community. Subject matter exp…
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Jun 13, 2023
Disco Fever: How Music Fueled a Cultural Revolution by Closeted History
Former Allyship is a Verb guest, Destiny Clarke (she/they), has a podcast called Closeted History: LGBTQ+ Stories of the Past. This is Season 2, Episode 2 of their show. Please give it a watch/listen (it's best to watch the video! You can watch it on Allyship is a Verb's Spotify feed or Closeted History's YouTube channel). Be sure to follow Destiny's show wherever you listen to podcasts to learn more about the LGBTQ+ community's history! - Chris Angel (they/them)
Disco Fever: How Music Fueled a Cultural Revolution
In this episode, we explore the impact of disco on LGBTQ+ rights and the evolving societal norms during the transformative 1970s. Disco was not just about dancing the night away; it was a revolutionary movement that gave a voice to those in the margins of society. The rise of disco from its origins in LGBTQ+ clubs to mainstream success in the late 1970s transformed the world of music and helped pave the way for an intersectional fight for human rights.
FOLLOW US 🌈 Subsc…
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Jun 6, 2023
Queer, Trans, And Gender Expansive Joy In The Workplace feat. Rex Wilde
This event aired live on June 2nd, 2023, via LinkedIn, and has been edited for brevity.
To sign up for Rex's roundtable event, visit https://www.rexwilde.com/tgx-monthly-roundtable
Enjoy this Pride Month bonus video episode! Join Rex Wilde (they/them) and Chris Angel Murphy (they/them) for a quick conversation about the importance and practice of queer joy and gender euphoria in the workplace. With so much discussion and movement around anti-LGBTQ legislation, it’s important to ground ourselves in how we can cultivate joy for LGBTQ+ and TGX+ (trans and gender expansive) folks – especially at work!
You can listen to the audio or watch this video on Spotify. Alternatively, you can watch on LinkedIn to see the comments from the attendees and participate in the conversation.
In this special bonus video episode, you will learn 1. How we define queer joy and gender euphoria 2. Some specific ways organizations and individuals can inspire joy for LGBTQ+ colleagues in the workplac…
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May 23, 2023
The Magic of LGBTQ+ Summer Camps feat. Rebecca Kling
Consider the relevance of someone's identity. This week, Rebecca Kling (she/her) discusses creating inclusive summer camps for LGBTQ+ youth where they can be themselves without making everything about being from the LGBTQ+ community. In this episode, you will learn 1. What conversations are coming up at summer camps 2. How B'Mitzvahs/B'nai Mitzvahs may differ from Bar and Bat Mitzvahs 3. When we might engage in understanding and empathic conversations and when it's time to disrupt and agitate for change.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/rebecca-kling
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/…
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May 9, 2023
The costs of religious trauma feat. Christina Carlson
* Sign up for Sam's workshop, Understanding the Basics of Neurodiversity and the Neurodiversity Movement. Happening virtually on Thursday, May 11th or 25th, 7-8 PM ET.
* Register for Speak Up! Tools for Active Trans Allyship with Chris Angel and Rebecca, Thursday, May 18th at 7 PM ET.
Do work on your own shame. This week, Christina Carlson (she/they) talks about how being ex-religious has impacted her life. In this episode, you will learn 1. How people are taught to distrust themselves, the harmful systems that upholds, and the additional impacts on queer and trans people 2. The impacts of not seeing yourself reflected around you 3. Why we should celebrate ourselves every chance we get.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/christina-carlson
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored qu…
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Apr 25, 2023
What is T4T? feat. Maze Felix
Want to book Chris Angel for Pride month and beyond? Here are their standard topics.
Have your own accountability system. This week, Maze Felix (they/them) talks about the beauty of T4T (trans for trans) relationships! In this episode, you will learn 1. What affirming actions they experienced behind the scenes while shooting a Pride Target commercial 2. Why being in community with others in their gender journeys is euphoric and healing 3. How relationships can be tested when trans, nonbinary, and gender expansive folks transition medically, legally, and/or socially.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/maze-felix
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in…
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Apr 11, 2023
Have you worked through your own trauma? feat. Shaan Dasani
Work through your own trauma; try to find connection points with folks. This week, Shaan Dasani (he/they) talks about creating Agents of Change and what it means to have an all-queer and trans cast! In this episode, you will learn 1. How spy movies like D.E.B.S. and the James Bond series inspired him while writing Agents of Change. 2. Why having someone as a possibility model was helpful for their gender journey 3. What in the world a “nibling” is.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/shaan-dasani
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcas…
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Mar 28, 2023
One woman's late in life lesbian story feat. Kathy Houston
RSVP to Celebrate Transgender Day of Visibility (TDOV)
RSVP to Connecting With Community: How to Build an Online Audience for your LGBTQ-owned Business
RSVP to Speak Up For TDOV: Talking Points for Active Trans Allyship
Put yourself in the other person's shoes. This week, Kathy Houston (she/her) talks about Club LILLES and what it means for her to be a late in life lesbian. In this episode, you will learn 1. How lesbian TikTok has been a wonderful, informative resource. 2. Why her first girlfriend gave her “homework.” 3. What it feels like to live in the affirming bubble of St. Petersburg, Florida.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/kathy-houston
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @G…
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Mar 14, 2023
How do you talk about someone with no pronouns? feat. Lianna Newman
Listen to listen, not to respond! This week, Lianna Newman (name only) expands on carving out space in STEM, finding community, and creating resources. In this episode, you will learn 1. Some changes we'd like to see in tech. 2. The complexities of gender-neutral vs gendered awards. 3. How to use no pronouns and what we mean when we ask someone for their pronouns in the first place.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/lianna-newman
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Feb 28, 2023
Exploring the kink spectrum and community feat. Wesley Toma
Exploring the kink spectrum and community! This week, Wesley Toma (he/him) expands on how kink is a spectrum, and for those who fall on it, it's very unlikely we're vanilla kinksters. In this episode, you will learn 1. How kinks and fetishes are different. 2. Some examples of how someone could start safely exploring the kink community. 3. Why he currently must travel out of state to access certain kink communities and spaces.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/wesley-toma
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-…
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Feb 14, 2023
Get clear on what you're willing to lose feat. Rebecca Minor
Check out Rebecca's parent coaching.
We’re nominated for Best Personal Growth and Best DIY for The Ambies! See the nominees and watch live on March 7, 2023, via Amazon Music’s Twitch Channel
Get clear on what you're willing to lose! This week, Rebecca Minor, LICSW (she/her), expands on why the term femme feels the most at home and who helped her to tap into that energy. In this episode, you will learn 1. Why her blog post about fictosexuality got a lot of attention, and what that even means. 2. How she owns "a shocking amount of pencil skirts" she doesn't wear, which leads to a larger conversation about her sensory experiences with gender presentation. 3. What she does as a gender specialist, and what she gets asked the most by parents she coaches.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/rebecca-minor
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes featur…
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Jan 31, 2023
The best apology is changed behavior feat. Kieran Mcmonagle
The best apology is changed behavior! This week, Kieran Mcmonagle (he/him) expands on how he's learned so much from young people in the LGBTQ+ community. In this episode, you will learn 1. Why he shares that he was born in the right queer, trans body. 2. How no space can be truly safe for everyone. 3. How parents of trans kids should love and support their kids and do their own processing in private.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/kieran-mcmonagle
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/support
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Jan 17, 2023
Turning mistakes into teachable moments feat. Ed Carratalà
Grab podcast merch here: https://www.bonfire.com/store/allyship-is-a-verb/
Be proud of your mistakes because they can become teachable moments! This week, Ed Carratalà (él/he/him) expands on how he spent 33 years of his life hiding parts of himself. In this episode, you will learn: 1. What it was like for him to attend his first pride event after coming out. 2. Why he had to teach his therapy students about the LGBTQ+ community in secret. 3. How therapists can cause great harm to clients and why it can be helpful for them to do the work of questioning their own gender and sexuality.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/ed-carratala
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send…
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Jan 3, 2023
Are You OK?: Empowering Trans Youth Through Storytelling feat. Jesse Freidin and Rebecca Minor
This event aired live on December 4th, 2022, and has been cut for clarity. "Are You OK?" documents the experiences and stories of 130+ trans and nonbinary youth living in the United States during this time of horrific anti-trans legislation.
You can watch this video on Spotify or YouTube. Looking for more info about the merch? Grab the wearable merch here and the stickers here!
Author and photographer Jesse Freidin (he/him) and gender specialist and parent coach Rebecca Minor, LICSW (she/her) discuss the resiliency of trans youth and the importance of empowering trans kids to tell their own stories. Are You OK?: Empowering Trans Youth Through Storytelling features audio clips of the interviews, portraits of the youth, and more.
In this special video episode, you will learn 1. Why this series is essential right now and what it's helping to combat. 2. What messages trans and nonbinary youth want to share with other youth. 3. The behind-the-scenes work going into Jesse's series and ho…
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Nov 22, 2022
Sex and gender are made-up concepts (like everything else) feat. Lena Dirscherl
Prepare yourself to stand up for others when they are not around! This week, Lena Dirscherl (they/them) expands on some of the many factors that influence gender. In this episode, you will learn: 1. What our thoughts are on the term "transgender" and where we think it's heading in the future. 2. Some of the many different definitions of "queer" or "queerness." 3. How "sex" and "gender" are made-up concepts and why that matters.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/lena-dirscherl
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-is-a-verb/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/allyship-…
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Nov 20, 2022
Bonus Episode: Check in on your LGBTQ+ friends and family
In the wake of the most recent tragedy yesterday (November 19th, 2022) at Club Q, an LGBTQ+ nightclub in Colorado Springs, CO, I am publishing a formerly recorded episode that I never released. At the time of posting this, we believe that 5 people are dead and 18 are injured. There was a drag show.
I didn't publish this episode because I thought it was too dark and heavy to be so early in the first season. I thought about revisiting it but then changed the format of the podcast episodes and it didn't fit anywhere else. But now, I feel moved to publish it.
I'm leaving it as recorded in its final version, July 2021.
If you want to learn how to support those of us in the LGBTQ+ community during this time, especially with the potential crunchiness of the holiday season that can come up for us, please listen to this episode and attend my Self-care for the Holigays: Taking care of ourselves and each other event. I'm co-presenting with my lovely friend, Cody Daigle-Orians (he/they).
You…
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Nov 8, 2022
Cassie Brighter on the hidden costs of being transgender, TSA PreCheck, and "the surgery"
Did you miss our November event? Watch it here on YouTube: Are You OK?: Empowering Trans Youth Through Storytelling feat. Jesse Freidin and Rebecca Minor
Content warning for abuse.
Nothing about us without us! This week, Cassie Brighter (she/her) expands on the hidden costs of being transgender, why TSA PreCheck may make travel safer for trans women, and how she responds to questions about "the surgery." In this episode, you will learn: 1. Why she doesn't want LGBTQ+ events at churches, even if they're affirming. 2. What it's like to run the Support Network for Parents of Trans Kids Facebook group. 3. How she learned about the "unacceptables in society" through bathroom graffiti and inappropriate jokes amongst adult men. We also discuss her being a trans advocate, mother, writer, and public speaker.
PS: It's Transgender Awareness Month! Will you share this episode with someone you think might benefit from hearing it?
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.…
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Oct 25, 2022
Cody Daigle-Orians on being ace, queer, and polyamorous
Did you miss our November event? Watch it here on YouTube: Are You OK?: Empowering Trans Youth Through Storytelling feat. Jesse Freidin and Rebecca Minor
Let's approach with curiosity! This week, Cody Daigle-Orians (he/they), AKA "Ace Dad Advice," explores what it means for them to be asexual, queer, and polyamorous. In this episode, you will learn: 1. How do his ace and polyamorous identities intersect? 2. How do they manage multiple relationships? 3. What is his experience of being ace within the broader LGBTQ+ community? We also discuss their upcoming book, I Am Ace: Advice on Living Your Best Asexual Life. It drops on January 19th, 2023, so please support Cody by pre-ordering or requesting it at your local library!
PS: Did you know Ace Week is October 23-29th this year? Follow Cody's social media accounts for lots of resources and info! Links are on the episode page below.
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/cody-daigle…
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Oct 11, 2022
Give people and situations grace feat. Mister Larrie
This episode is sponsored by a private donor. Thank you!!!
Give people and situations grace. In this week's episode, Mister Larrie (he/him) and I get SILLY! It starts off with him encouraging you to do the work of finding your people in your communities (and to be patient with the process). We get into mistakes and how having a learner's mindset can help, including when others correct us. Learn what he's been told as a Black man about his career, mental health, and more. Mister Larrie reflects on being visible at multiple intersections and the emotional labor involved in holding those spaces for others, especially during his academic career. Early on, the pandemic inspired his switch to social media as his persona, Mister Larrie, in which he produces videos about mental health and crafting. We reminisce about elementary school and some of the projects we'd do as kids, which you may have done, too. Woof! Have you heard of the bear community? Mister Larrie and I give examples of our exp…
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Sep 27, 2022
The Patriarchy Episode feat. Petey Gibson
This episode is sponsored by a private donor. Thank you!!!
Content warning for LGBTQ+ youth discrimination, suicide statistics.
The Patriarchy Episode. In this week's episode, Petey Gibson (he/him) shares about who he's inspired by to embody gentle masculinity. Suppose you've wondered about the differences between characters written as cisgender men versus trans men or transmasculine people. In that case, Petey explains what he's experienced in Hollywood. We also get into the film he starred in and produced: The Sympathy Card, a Boston-based lesbian rom-com. Learn what Petey misses about the lesbian community and some of what his transition means to him. Petey reflects on Gen Z, LGBTQ+ media being niche, LGBTQ+ stories that don't involve trauma or coming out, the first time he passed as a man in public, comedy, sobriety, drag, Dyke Day LA, and more!
Resources, references, and full transcripts are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com/episode/petey-gibson
Host Chris Angel (they/them)…
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Sep 13, 2022
Why do some people use two sets of pronouns? feat. Josée Sovinsky
This episode is sponsored by a private donor. Thank you!!!
Did you miss the launch party for the Corporate Guide to LGBTQ+ Events? You can watch the recording and purchase the guide here!
Why do some people use two sets of pronouns? In this week's episode, Josée Sovinsky (she/they) updates us on what's changed since we spoke early last season, including pronouns and identities. If you've ever wondered why some people use two or more sets of pronouns, Josée explains what it means for her and how she tested they/them out before sharing that additional set with more people. They talk about the cisgender/transgender binary and how people can exist somewhere in between or outside of that, though we may not yet have the language for the experience. We also get into what it means to expand on definitions, create new terminology, adopt generic labels, or reject labels entirely (and how it's a personal process for everyone to decide what works for them). Learn why she thinks there is overla…
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Aug 30, 2022
Anger and fury can be turned into action that can create change feat. Jesse Freidin
This episode is sponsored by a private donor. Thank you!!!
Interested in the Corporate Guide to LGBTQ+ Events? Watch the recorded launch party on LinkedIn! You can now buy the guide here.
Anger and fury can be turned into action that can create change. In this week’s episode, Jesse Freidin (he/him) shares about his former photography projects and how he's surprised himself by working on a new series that hits close to home. The "Are you OK?" series addresses the current wave of anti-trans legislation by interviewing trans and gender nonconforming youth with their families all over the States. Jesse talks us through some of what it takes to work on such a project, including building trust with the local communities, families, and youth themselves. We also get into the steps to maintain his own safety, especially as his work has him road-tripping all over. We discuss how concepts like "being an adult" and age overall may be different for trans folks. Learn about how he decides what k…
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Aug 16, 2022
Listen to minorities and thank them feat. Ra Ra Rollins
Content warning for mentions of George Floyd's murder and generally sensitive topics without details.
This episode is sponsored by a private donor. Thank you!!!
Listen to minorities and thank them. In this week’s episode, Ra Ra Rollins (he/him) shares why he claims “queer” and “gay” and the difference in meaning for him between the two terms. He ponders if he’s Black first or gay, queer first, especially since not all spaces see him as a whole person with various, complex identities. Learn about how his work can be triggering as a Black therapist and what it means for him to hold space for clients at some of his same intersections. We also discuss how he pushed back in his grad school program because he learned from white professors who talked about white theorists and had white supervisors while seeing white clients. Despite that, he did gain two incredible mentors and friends for life. Ra Ra reclaims his energy by practicing boundaries, which did not come naturally to h…
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Aug 2, 2022
Don't forget to live a queer, abundant life and laugh feat. Richard Follett
This episode is sponsored by Rebecca Minor, LICSW (she/her). For more information about her parent and caregiver coaching, please visit: https://www.genderspecialist.com/coaching
Don't forget to live a queer, abundant life and laugh. In this week’s episode, Richard Follett (he/him) shares how each of his intersections has shaped a portion of who he is and that while some of them may seem at odds with each other, that's not the case for him. Learn about how he knew he was gay at the age of four but found himself trying to "pray away the gay" and entered into a heterosexual marriage. We also discuss how the Metropolitan Community Church helped him to "marry" his sexuality and Christianity. Richard recalls several times people assumed he was straight/heterosexual because of myths and misconceptions people have about gay men and how he pushed for equality in his teachings with his students and colleagues throughout his career. There's also some storytelling related to his relationship…
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May 24, 2022
Special Video Episode: Trans Day of Visibility Nonbinary Panel! feat. Zoa Glows, Maze Felix, and Noel Fernando
This episode is sponsored by Rebecca Minor, LICSW. For more information about her course, How To Talk To Kids About Gender, please visit: https://www.genderspecialist.com/learn Listeners of this podcast get 10% off with code ALLYSHIP
For more information about her resource, My Kid Just Came Out: Free Guide for Parents, please visit: https://www.genderspecialist.com/nowwhat
And if you're looking to book an LGBTQ+ event for Pride month or after, consider hiring me: https://www.chrisangelmurphy.com
Our last episode of season one is a special video event featuring the live panel from Trans Day of Visibility on March 31st, 2022! It features stories and wisdom from Zoa Glows (they/she) [current set of pronouns since the event aired], Maze Felix (they/them), and Noel Fernando (they/them) at the intersections of being both nonbinary and trans. Zoa Glows was also a guest on the podcast earlier on in the season and it's one of the listener favorites! We got some great comments, questions, and…
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May 10, 2022
Do you take action? feat. Destiny Clarke
This episode is sponsored by Rebecca Minor, LICSW. For more information about her course, How To Talk To Kids About Gender, please visit: https://www.genderspecialist.com/learn Listeners of this podcast get 10% off with code ALLYSHIP
Do you take action? In this week’s episode, Destiny Clarke (she/her) talks about why she left teaching in the classroom to pursue a career in providing teachers with LGBTQ+ inclusive education. We discuss how living in North Carolina as a pansexual person isn't exactly easy and some surprising spaces and communities where she's found support. Learn what she calls "bless your heart homophobia" and what that can look like in the South. Destiny explains how her gender expression has evolved over the years and how good it's felt to get support from her current partner. Learn about the 3 times she's started a Gender and Sexuality Alliance (GSA) club in her schools and how each time was different, including how she handled an instance of a parent pushing back…
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Apr 26, 2022
Are you open to other's paths? feat. Dominic
This episode is sponsored by Rebecca Minor, LICSW. For more information about her resource, My Kid Just Came Out: Free Guide for Parents, please visit: _https://www.genderspecialist.com/nowwhat_
Are you open to other's paths? In this week’s episode, Dominic (he/him) talks about the first time he got hit on by a girl and how that started his sexuality (and later gender) journey. Learn about what shifts occurred in his life as he started to be read as a man in society and some decisions he's made as a result, including going stealth. We also discuss how he told his mom he's a trans man and some of her initial reactions. Dominic talks about how he's felt in LGBTQ+ spaces over the years and how he kind of misses them but it would contradict his decision to be private. He also talks about co-running a support group and some of the stressful moments that have come about as a result.
* When did I first hear about the LGBTQ+ community? Was it a positive experience?
* Has anyone ever co…
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Apr 12, 2022
Do you support queer businesses? feat. Charlie Sprinkman
This episode is sponsored by Rebecca Minor, LICSW. For more information about her resource, My Kid Just Came Out: Free Guide for Parents, please visit: _https://www.genderspecialist.com/nowwhat_
Do you support queer businesses? In this week’s episode, Charlie Sprinkman (he/they) talks about growing up in "small-town vibes" Wisconsin and how it's important for people to find the best language for themselves. Learn about what happened when he came out during the Trump administration. We also discuss how important it is to make things better broadly for future generations and nerd out over the power of LGBTQ+ camps like Brave Trails. Charlie talks about their resource, Everywhere is Queer, and how they got the inspiration for it while driving home from Brave Trails. He also talks about voice dysphoria, traveling across 40+ states, and what queer spaces can do for people. Self-reflection:
* Have I ever been in a queer space? What did that feel like for me?
* How would it feel for m…
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Mar 29, 2022
Do you do the work? feat. Katrina Strohl
This episode is sponsored by Rebecca Minor, LICSW. For more information about her course, How To Talk To Kids About Gender, please visit: https://www.genderspecialist.com/learn Listeners of this podcast get 10% off with code ALLYSHIP
The Trans Day of Visibility: Nonbinary Visibility panel is now available to watch here: https://youtu.be/mYPQBrBvwrc
Do you do the work? In this week’s episode, Katrina Strohl (they/she/he) talks about why they freely share their identities and how they want to be centered as a person versus their identities when brought up in conversations. Learn about what a "safety pause" is and some tips on how you may be able to support someone if it comes up in any of your conversations. We also discuss how she has a great practice of sending follow-up emails after networking calls by recalling what was discussed and any next steps. Furthermore, he's amassed a huge list of resources across various topics if folks need more support than he's able to provide relat…
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Mar 15, 2022
Do you have a learner’s mindset? feat. Nick Daily
This episode is sponsored by Rebecca Minor, LICSW (she/her). For more information about her resource, My Kid Just Came Out: Free Guide for Parents, please visit: https://www.genderspecialist.com/nowwhat/
Do you have a learner’s mindset? In this week’s episode, Nick Daily (he/they) shares about what sparked the daily reminders he posts to Instagram to inspire others. Learn about why they’re learning to say “no” and what it means with the nuance of being Black, among their other identities, and practices like not working on their birthday. We also discuss the silliness of people and companies requesting Black History Month and Pride Month events not soon enough. Please request them much, much sooner and not during the actual month! Nick talks about what queer leadership means to him and how he doesn’t believe that our way to freedom and liberation is through the disposability of people. Some self-reflection:
* What do you think queer leadership means?
* Have you ever c…
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Mar 1, 2022
Do you check in on your relationships? feat. Trystan Reese
Do you check in on your relationships? In this week’s episode, Trystan Reese (he/him) shares about his days of being a drag king and how he's been performing as a man since he was a kid. Learn about some of the practices he's adopted to check in with his colleagues so that they're in a continuous feedback loop, including addressing power dynamics and microaggressions. We also discuss a bit of what it's like to be trainers and consultants and the work that goes into it, including figuring out our boundaries and doing the work to know how to facilitate conversations. Trystan talks about how moved he was by Alok's talk on the podcast Man Enough and how well they were able to articulate thoughts that have been circling in his own mind. Some self-reflection:
* What does being a man mean to me, whether or not I am one?
* Do I know any men who have been or are pregnant?
* Have I ever reported something on social media? What happened?
* Which lenses do I view the world in?
* Are…
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Feb 15, 2022
Do you talk over marginalized communities? feat. Mon Malanovich-Gallagher
Do you talk over marginalized communities? In this week’s episode, Mon Malanovich-Gallagher (they/them) shares about being an LGBTQI+ speaker and facilitator and what some of their experience as an introvert can look like, including introducing the term “anchor.” Learn why they left Poland and the importance of language including identities that reflect our experience. We also discuss employment diversity questions and how data matters while recognizing the privilege of being able to answer as honestly as possible. Have you ever wondered why there’s gatekeeping within the broader LGBTQ+ community and subgroups? Mon talks about how we should be able to claim our own identities and that what we land on feels right to us as individuals without trying to fit any “standards.” We also discuss what it might look like to queer-ify relationships, an example of a supportive pronoun question, and being aware of our impact on and how we show up for marginalized communities. Some self-…
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Feb 1, 2022
Do you validate other people's experiences? feat. Chris Tompkins
Do you validate other people's experiences? In this week’s episode, Chris Tompkins (he/him) shares about being an LGBTQ inner advocate and practicing allyship toward himself. Learn how he found his way to sobriety while acknowledging that AA isn't for everyone. We also discuss the term "Guncle" and how being one was part of the inspiration for his book, Raising LGBTQ Allies. Have you ever heard of "machismo?" Chris talks about how it influences Latin American culture and what it meant for the messages he received as a young gay child. We also discuss what it's like sharing our stories on PFLAG panels, spirituality, and how heteronormativity is a lot like humidity...!
Some self-reflection:
1. Do I make space for people in my life who are sober?
2. Are there many events near me that don’t revolve around or include alcohol?
3. Do I attend any events called happy hour, whether or not anyone drinks?
4. Has someone ever applied silver lining to a hardship I was experiencing? How di…
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Jan 18, 2022
Do you show up in LGBTQ+ spaces with a sense of humor? feat. Jaffe
Do you show up in LGBTQ+ spaces with a sense of humor? In this week’s episode, Jaffe (she/her) shares the origins of her drag show, Them Fatale Drag Kings. Learn how she claims the terms "lesbian" and "queer." We also discuss the Los Angeles queer bar scene when we were in our early 20’s and how it is present day. Have you ever wondered if you’re welcome to an LGBTQ+ space as someone not from the community? Jaffe talks about how it’s important to have a sense of humor when entering such spaces. We also get vulnerable about how when I was first coming out under the transgender umbrella, our friendship was put to the test and that she would do things much differently today. Some self-reflection:
1. Do I have any transgender people in my life who I’ve asked invasive questions, especially about their body?
2. Have I ever made any in-community jokes from a community I didn’t belong to?
3. Have I ever had a hard time with someone "coming out" to me or inviting me in to who the…
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Jan 4, 2022
Do you know how to actively listen? feat. Dr. Leah Tidey
Do you know how to actively listen? In this week’s episode, Dr. Leah Tidey (she/her) shares about how her definition of bisexuality has evolved since she first claimed it at the age of 12. Learn how intersections of bisexuality and consensual non-monogamy have created stigma she’s been pushing against. We also discuss Robyn Och’s definition of bisexuality and how Leah’s work as a sexual health educator can be tricky in terms of how much of herself she feel comfortable sharing with her students or overall in certain spaces due to bisexual erasure and biphobia. Have you ever wondered why people may use the term “partner”? Leah talks about how she doesn’t want to deceive people and doesn’t feel she is; she’s intentional about how it’s encompassing as a term and moves way from traditions we may have been taught, while recognizing the privilege in feeling comfortable enough to use it. We also talk about how COVID-19 and the pandemic overall has brought about lots of conv…
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Nov 30, 2021
Do you know how to take the charge out of a mistake? feat. Provvidenza Catalano
Do you know how to take the charge out of a mistake? In this week’s episode, Provvidenza Catalano (they/them) shares about how the closer they get to who they are versus how Hollywood typecasts folks, they now get more interest and are called in for different roles. Learn how intersections of fatphobia, transphobia, butchphobia, ableism, and more have shaped their experiences and the work they're doing internally. We also discuss some of what casual representation could look like and how much more authentic and nuanced stories would be for LGBTQ+ characters and beyond if we embraced this kind of storytelling. Have you been disappointed with a marginalized character because they weren't the perfect representation of that demographic? Provvidenza talks about how asking characters to be "the most acceptable version" [...] "is not revolutionary in any stretch of the imagination." We also talk about active allies and how taking the "charge" and "hotness" out of a mistake can be helpful to…
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Nov 16, 2021
Do you lean on marginalized people to educate you? feat. Dr. Kyl Myers
Do you lean on marginalized people to educate you? In this week’s episode, Dr. Kyl Myers (they/them, she/her) shares how their gender creative parenting has evolved over the years and that it can look different for each family. Learn how gender creative parenting gave her an opportunity to check in with herself about her own gender and gender expression. We also discuss some of the questions that you asked on Instagram! Are you trying to support friends in your life who have LGBTQ+ kids? Kyl talks about some of what's helped them, which might sound counterintuitive. We also talk about the emotional labor of internet trolls and some of the pressures of a large following on social media.
Self-reflection questions:
* Do I have permission to share my kid’s LGBTQ+ identity with others?
* If I don’t have permission, how can I still seek out support without potentially outing them?
* If my friends have kids who are part of the LGBTQ+ community, do I make space for other topics?…
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Nov 2, 2021
Are you seeking out different voices? feat. Leo Yockey
Are you seeking out different voices? In this week’s episode, Leo Yockey (he/him) shares how his first tech job denied him the opportunity to control his own narrative. Learn what surprised him about the experience and hear how it shaped the man he is today. We also discuss the "I'm not gay hug." Are you a fan of Tan France from Queer Eye? Leo talks about how reading Tan's memoir was the inverse of his experience, though it helped him find a man to model himself after. Explicit rating for some mild language throughout.
Self-reflection questions:
* Does your place of work have a gender-neutral restroom?
* Have you ever had to plan your day around using the restroom?
* Have there ever been bathrooms that made you feel unsafe? Why?
* Do you have only one friend of a particular race or ethnicity? How come?
* What are you doing to diversify your social media feeds?
* Do you take the time to actively listen to people of different experiences than you?
* Have you ever thoug…
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Oct 26, 2021
Are you open to being a better ally through feedback? feat. Laura Graving
Are you open to being a better ally through feedback? In this week’s episode, Laura Graving (she/her) shares about how there are tarot decks that are queer and trans-inclusive. Learn what support she offers folks and what values she founded her small business on. We also discuss why LGBTQ+ folks can feel seen and validated by astrology, tarot, and similar practices. Have you ever used white sage to cleanse a space? She talks about how we can ethically source our white sage and what tips can take those practices to the next level.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities.
Please consider following where you listen to podcasts and become a supporter! Keep the conversation going on Instagram @GenderS…
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Oct 19, 2021
Is your therapist the right fit for you?
Is your therapist the right fit for you? Do you even want or have access to one? In the previous episode, Dr. Rick Grant-Coons (he/him) shared out the allyship tip "Just trust that people know who they are best. They know themselves best and just believe that they can tell you who they are and that is the truth, right? Like, let people tell you who they are. And just believe, accept, celebrate, find out what works for them, and not try to define for them or tell them who they should be, what they are. How they're doing this wrong, you know, just instead just say, "Hey, I'm going to trust in you and I'm going to learn who you are by you telling me and that's how I will support you and figure out how we all can navigate this world a little bit better."
In this mini-episode, host Chris Angel (they/them) discusses some of their own experiences with therapy over the years. Self-reflection questions/journaling prompts for people in or seeking therapy:
1. Does the mental health professional…
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Oct 12, 2021
Do you trust that people know who they are? feat. Dr. Rick Grant-Coons
Do you trust that people know who they are? In this week’s episode, Dr. Rick Grant-Coons (he/him) shares about moving 13 times every 1-3 years in the south as a young person and how, in some ways, it was easier to come out because of all of the moving. Learn what support he received and which communities he found comfort in over the years. We also discuss some signs to look for in an LGBTQ+ affirmative therapist. Have you ever wondered what even is LGBTQ+ affirmative therapy? He talks about the programs he took and how access to this information is more accessible for mental health providers now. We also discuss how, ideally, professional disclosure of personal identities should be for the greater good of the person you're trying to help.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one all…
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Oct 5, 2021
Is your allyship accidentally performative?
Is your allyship accidentally performative? In the previous episode, Tasha Colin (rolling they/them, she/her) shared out the allyship tip "Honestly, I would love if people wouldn't assume or- I would love for people to ask me what my identities mean for me in order to know how to support me better. Versus maybe hearing how I identify and then assuming certain things. Yet, just asking me how they can support me is supportive."
In this mini-episode, host Chris Angel (they/them) introduces ways people and businesses may accidentally be practicing performative allyship. Self-reflection questions/journaling prompts:
1. Have I been told that my allyship is performative?
2. Are my actions and words consistent with how I want to show up as an ally?
3. What am I willing to do for the LGBTQ+ community?
4. What are boundaries I have for myself?
5. How can I push past any discomfort or tension of allyship?
6. Who are some other allies I can engage with and talk to if and when things get ha…
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Sep 28, 2021
Do you ask people what kind of support they need? feat. Tasha Colin
Do you ask people what kind of support they need? In this week’s episode, Tasha Colin (rolling they/them, she/her) shares about coming out as a previously held identity and what three magic words of support boosted their spirit. Learn what book helped spark her curiosity and made her feel seen. We also discuss how asking about pronouns is totally okay AND how asking personal questions about sex and how people have it is NOT a good way of showing support. Have you ever heard of the term demisexual and wondered what that was all about or why a term is needed for that experience? They talk about how their claimed identities have evolved over the years and why their identities and terms may continue to change as time goes on. We also wonder if utopia and liberation are possible when folks don't all agree on what that looks like.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ e…
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Sep 21, 2021
Can we agree to stop assuming straight is the default?
Can we agree to stop assuming straight is the default? In the previous episode, Josée Sovinsky (she/her) shared out the allyship tip for people to "...actively seek out opportunities to [...] question their assumptions that they make."
In this mini-episode, host Chris Angel (they/them) revisits this tip and introduces why coming out is a privilege, complicated, and nuanced. They also talk about how if LGBTQ+ youth are considering coming out, they need a safety plan if they have any reason to believe they might be rejected by their families. In fact, it may be best to wait. Instead of self-reflections this episode, Chris Angel is asking for you to help get the Equality Act passed in the United States Senate or get involved with helping to get LGBTQ+ protections passed where you live.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and social…
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Sep 14, 2021
Do you question your assumptions? feat. Josée Sovinsky
Do you question your assumptions? In this week’s episode, Josée Sovinsky (she/her) shares about coming out on her professional Instagram page this past pride month and what happened as a result. Learn what messages she was given about bisexuality while questioning her own sexual orientation. We also discuss honoring marginalized communities by believing in science AND holding space for people’s own uniquely lived experiences + expertise (and paying them for it!). Have you ever wondered about some of the reasons why people don’t want to come out, especially as bi? She talks about how she claimed queer first because of all of the stigma, bi-erasure, biphobia, and lack of representation overall.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at https://www.allyshipisaverb.com/episodes/josee-sovinsky/
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip…
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Sep 7, 2021
What are rolling pronouns? Are there questions you shouldn't ask trans people?
What are rolling pronouns? Are there questions you shouldn't ask trans people? In the previous episode, Zoa Glows (rolling she/her, they/them, he/him) shared out the allyship tip: "My ally tip is to pause and ask yourself, "will my compliments, questions, and language uplift this individual? Or could they possibly cause them discomfort or harm?" Because each of those things- compliments, questions, a lot of questions have called caused me harm and discomfort and a lot of language has caused me harm and discomfort. But on the flip side, a lot of it has uplifted me. So if you are willing, and you're wanting to uplift me, that's what I would love. Uplift me and make me feel like you see me and so: pause. Before you say something and think about those things and I think that people could possibly feel a little safer in approaching if they pause to think about whether they're gonna hurt me or not."
In this mini-episode, host Chris Angel (they/them) revisits this tip and introduces th…
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Aug 31, 2021
Do you think before you speak? feat. Zoa Glows
Do you think before you speak? In this week’s episode, Zoa Glows (she/her they/them, he/him) shares about coming out to her students and family. Learn about what messages he was given as a black person while navigating a big, religious family, his LGBTQ+ identities over the years, and the noise of society overall telling and teaching him to hate himself (but he rose above it!). We also discuss honoring students by giving a name + pronoun sheet ahead of time and how the term deadnaming doesn’t resonate for everyone. Have you been wondering why someone might use multiple pronoun sets? They talk about how all three sets embrace different parts of themself + as a whole person and how you can absolutely ask people how they want you to use multiple pronoun sets.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at https://www.allyshipisaverb.com/episodes/zoa-glows
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and socia…
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Aug 24, 2021
Calling in conversations and tips for bridging generations
Are you open to a conversation? In the previous episode, Coco Peru (she/her, he/him) shared out her allyship tip: "What's important is the story. And so I would encourage that part of allyship be don't always judge a person on what they are presenting, but listen to their story. Because the story is where it's rich and the story is where you're going to connect with that person. The person that might appear so different from you, might actually be your greatest ally. So I think that for me, was the biggest lesson in creating Coco."
In this mini-episode, host Chris Angel revisits this tip and shares out a suggestion for calling people in. They also give the following tips/self-reflections for building bridges across generations.
1. Have you built any bridges to connect with people of different generations?
2. Are there voices not being heard or included at events you attend?
3. Is there an LGBTQ+ archive near you? Sometimes they can be dedicated to specific sub-groups. You may find…
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Aug 17, 2021
Listen to our stories and connect with us feat. Coco Peru
Are you open to our stories or do you make snap judgments? In this week’s episode, Coco Peru (she/her, he/him) shares her history with self-identifying and how she's still seeking inspirational + affirming language, loving and reclaiming terms that are still used as slurs today, and a time in her life where the trans community and drag performers were under the same umbrella (and may still be for certain folks). We also discuss what it was like discovering We’wha and the term Two Spirit from a book, how reality TV has shaped drag over the years, and the importance of having conversations - especially when there are differences. Coco also shares about a time she handled an upsetting situation and the shift that occurred after.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship ti…
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Aug 10, 2021
How do I apologize? Three tools to build confidence
How do you apologize when you make a mistake? In the previous episode, Shane Whalley (ze/hir) shared out hir allyship tip: "I think being a good ally, is the willingness to be uncomfortable. If you make a mistake, I'm a big believer that I would love for someone[... to] #AcknowledgeandApologize and then ask if there's anything needed for repair and then do better. Right. And so for me, we're always going to make mistakes. We're always going to make mistakes. But, what we do once we do them is again, for me, is where our greatest learning happens and it's where our greatest healing happens."
In this mini-episode, host Chris Angel revisits this tip and shares out 3 tools to help you genuinely apologize: 1. oops ouch I'm sorry, 2. nine essential ingredients of a true apology, and 3. a repair model. These tools combined will help to give you the confidence you need to give better apologies. There are also self-reflection questions to help deepen the learning:
1. Have I been on the recei…
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Aug 3, 2021
Acknowledge and Apologize Allyship feat. Shane Whalley
Do you acknowledge and apologize when you make a mistake? #AcknowledgeandApologize In this week’s episode, Shane Whalley (ze/hir) shares a bit about hir history of language and community. Learn about the differences between cultural competency, cultural humility, and cultural responsiveness. We also discuss honoring community organizations that have been doing the work to embrace the trans community and why acknowledging their history is important. Have you been wondering as a cisgender and heterosexual ally if you can use the term queer? Ze has some tips for you.
Resources, references, and full transcripts for each episode are available at www.allyshipisaverb.com
Host Chris Angel (they/them) has a background in LGBTQ+ education, community organizing, and social work. Guest episodes feature at least one allyship tip, including tailored questions given their unique intersecting identities. Please consider following where you listen to podcasts and become a supporter! Keep the conv…
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Jul 10, 2021
Season 1 Trailer
It's not too late to start your allyship practice or continue to make adjustments. This show talks about LGBTQ+ allyship tips and passing the mic. Episodes are quick tips that include some self-reflection questions, as well as longer episodes dedicated to passing the mic to keep the conversation intersectional. We'll hear from a wide range of LGBTQ+ guests about what tips they have, including any allyship they may practice.
Let's create a safer space and learn about practicing allyship together! Full transcripts available at AllyshipisaVerb.com Host Chris Angel (they/them) is from Los Angeles, CA and now lives in Denver, CO. Their background is in LGBTQ+ training, community organizing, and social work. Subscribe to their monthly newsletter and enroll in their courses through LGBTQ School. Check out GenderSexuality.Info for national US LGBTQ+ resources. Get episode teasers and additional tips on Instagram at @GenderSexualityInfo --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.c…
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