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Noah Kalina & Adam Lisagor
Noah Kalina and Adam Lisagor try a new direct-to-consumer product every week, review it, unpack it and explore its space in our lives and its place in our culture.
4 days ago
Hey do you want to get in on some of these Dried Noodles from world-famous chef David Chang’s restaurant, Momofuku? Well TOO BAD because you CAN’T. They’ve sold out TWICE and you really SHAT THE BED on this one, but luckily, we didn’t shit the bed, we nabbed some Chang noods and slurped em up. HELL YEAH. Please enjoy our review.
Jan 10, 2022
Holy cow, that went by fast. 2021 filled us up with so many products, good and bad. Let’s spend this hour revisiting our favorite nine, in no particular order because we literally came up with this idea while recording.
Dec 20, 2021
There’s nothing like a fresh-baked, homemade cookie. But to bake the cookie, you gotta have the dough. That’s where this week’s product starts: it’s cookie dough in a jar, it’s vegan and gluten-free, you can eat it with a spoon but most importantly, you bake it. It’s spelled D-E-U-X but they call it “Dough” which I object to but here we are. Let’s bake some cookies.
Dec 13, 2021
What does clean feel like? And I mean truly clean, on a deeper level. Is clean even possible when your methods are just deflection and divergence? Today, we’re talking about bidet seats, and the true meaning of a strong spray, directly up into your butt, for that is where the elusive feeling of clean may be discovered.
Dec 6, 2021
It’s a food, it’s a bar, it’s a food bar and it’s from Bearded Brothers, which is a company in Austin with two actual brothers who have beards. We’re going to try those food bars. They come in flavors and we’ll try them. Along the way, we’ll learn, we’ll laugh, we’ll do ratings about them, toward the end. Food bars!
Nov 29, 2021
Why do we drink? Do we love the taste? Do we want to relax and unwind? Maybe it’s about the ritual of a well-crafted cocktail. But is it possible to have the ritual without the alcohol? We’ll find out today as we mix up some mocktails with Ritual, a zero proof liquor alternative. Let’s get sauced without the sauce.
Nov 22, 2021
Some of the world’s best food comes in little pockets. Tiny pouches of self-contained goodness. Some of it’s hot like the soup dumplings from Xiao Chi Jie, cheesy like Snow Days pizza bites, or gooey like Chubby PB&J. We’ll have a three-course meal today, so open up and take a bite or whatever.
Nov 8, 2021
What happens to that cardboard box with the big smile once you put it in the bin? It’s not fun to think about, but that box gets shipped off to a facility that ruins the planet for children. Boox is a different kind of package that gets reused and sent off to make the world healthy for children and other living things. Let’s open it up and see what’s inside.
Nov 1, 2021
Trimmings, clippings, and even droppings from your beard…where do they go once they’ve departed your face? This dilemma has vexed beard havers across borders throughout time, but one company, The Beard King, has emerged with a solution. We’ll put it to the test in the All Consuming lab, and find out what we can catch.
Oct 25, 2021
Magic Mind is the world’s…claims to be the world’s first productivity drink, an herbal supplement with adaptogens and nootropics that you drink from a very tiny bottle. Will it make you 30-40% more productive? Or is it in fact just tiny juice? We’ll find out today.
Oct 18, 2021
What the hell is an NFT? And how should you feel about them? We’re going to tell you today, with the help of our artist-curator-technologist friend Justin Ouellette and a visit from Fanuel Leul, an Afrofuturist artist whose work we each acquired for our own NFT collections. Join us on the blockchain because this one is going straight to the moon.
1 hr 28 min
Oct 4, 2021
On today’s show, we’ll unbox the iPhone from Apple. This upgrade is the most advanced pro camera system ever on iPhone; Super Retina XDR display with ProMotion; A15 Bionic, and so much more. We really think you’re going to love this episode, and we can’t wait to see what you [pbbbt]
1 hr 20 min
Sep 27, 2021
I scream, you scream, let’s all scream because we’re so we’re all so frickin’ hungry and the world is let’s be honest kind of a scary place right now and so in order to get through this we’re gonna need a little more joy from the simple things, which is why Brave Robot and McConnell’s made dairy-free ice cream. Delicious.
Sep 20, 2021
Snack Pack 2: Snack ’em and Pack ’em
You know when you’re between meals, and you need something to keep you going but not a donut or a steak tartare? Today, we snack…on functional cookies from Mmmly, sortasweet candy bars from Gigantic! and grain-free crackers from Ancient Provisions, and we think once you snack on this pack, you’re never goin’ back.
Sep 13, 2021
You know what they say about the unexamined life? Just, like, examine it, bro. And there’s a company called Withings that makes a line of smart devices to examine your life by way of your body. They sent us some stuff to examine our bodies so that we could have better lives, and you know what? It just might work.
Sep 6, 2021
Do you know about the concept of honkaku? It’s authenticity and adherence to the principle of quality and truth and integrity in craftsmanship. It’s the basis of this podcast but also, it’s the core of Ramen Hero, a ramen meal kit company that ships ramen to you so you too can be honkaku. Be a ramen hero.
Aug 30, 2021
OluKai is high-quality footwear brand with incredibly comfortable sandals and slippers, so you can live aloha on your feet. Bose Frames are surprisingly stylish sunglasses that augment your world with a layer of crisp, immersive sound. What do these two things have in common? I’m on vacation, you guys.
Aug 16, 2021
You know when you’re getting a massage and they hit that spot, and it’s like oh my god, you’re like please never stop, and you’re like if I could hit that spot myself, I’d never leave the house but you know it would present all kinds of other problems you could never have anticipated? Vertiball helps you hit that spot in a safe, non-committal way.
Aug 9, 2021
Would you strap plants to your feet if it was good for the planet, looked cool and made people admire you? Then you’ll want to look into Kengos, the plant-based shoes that are comfortable, stylish and plant-based. Lace up and take a walk with us.
Aug 2, 2021
If you’re like us, you want to get high but not too high. Back in the day, when your parents got high, weed just wasn’t as strong. Now? Cannabis is optimized to fuck your shit up. Dad Grass is an LA company that takes weed back in the day, with a low enough dose of THC you can get it in the mail. Let’s toke and be happy together.
Jul 19, 2021
Would you like some liquid nitrogen with your coffee? It’s called Cometeer, and wait till ya hear what it costs. Not that much actually. The best beans, roasted, flash frozen and shipped to your door for a cup that is indistinguishable from fresh brewed. Is there life before coffee?
Jul 12, 2021
What do you wear around the house, when you just want to be comfy, and look fresh and you’re kind of feeling yourself? For some people, the answer is “I dunno” but for people who know, the answer is Jambys. Performance inactivewear for the great indoors. Meka leka hi meka hiney ho.
Jul 6, 2021
The English playwright Arthur Wing Pinero said “Where there’s tea, there is hope.” We bought some Ukiyo tea infusers for today’s show, and we hope wasn’t a waste of money. Joining us is the movie producer and tea aficionado Keith Calder to infuse some tea and some knowledge into our very unsteeped minds.
1 hr 4 min
Jun 28, 2021
Close your eyes. Take a whiff. Now open your eyes, you’re on the beach and it’s 1988. You want to protect your skin and make it glow, so you reach for your bottle of Vacation, an “excessively good” sunscreen from the retro sexy makers of the Poolsuite FM radio station. Make no mistake, this is a horny sunscreen. So slather it on, soak up some rays and travel down memory lane with us.
Jun 21, 2021
Time was, milk came from cows. Now, milk comes from a lot of other places. Califia Farms makes a range of oat milks that have earned a loyal following, including our guest today, filmmaker Kailee McGee. We taste some oat milk, some mushroom oatmilk, even some hemp milk and see if it deserves the blue checkmark of milk.
1 hr 13 min
Jun 14, 2021
The expression “like a warm blanket” means that something just feels right. Rumpl is a mission-driven warm blanket brand that just feels right. Made sustainably, with some cool innovative features, you’ll want to get into this blankie by the fire and get moist with us. What? Nothing.
Jun 7, 2021
Sometimes you buy a product and it disappears into thin air. Today we discuss two such products: Boost Oxygen, which is oxygen in a can; and then Plus, a body wash whose packaging disintegrates in your shower so you can lather your bits without the guilt or murdering the planet.
May 24, 2021
“Fishwife” in the 16th century meant the daughters and wives of fishermen who sold fish at market. Fishwife in the 21st century is a hot DTC Instagram brand of ethically sourced tinned fish that come direct to your doorstep and goes real nice on a cracker. Fish is on the menu today so…let’s get fishy I guess.
May 17, 2021
Are your feet disgusting? Then it might be time to pamper those wretched little guys with FEETS, a literal plastic bag filled with tea tree goop to naturally repair, cool and moisturize your foot skin. Today we got world-famous actor comedian Rob Huebel to join us for a spa day. What did you ever do? Not jackshit probably.
1 hr 22 min
May 10, 2021
If you could get a needle poked in your arm and it could let you and your neighbors go back outside again, would you do it? If society could come back to health because your immune system had new knowledge, does that sound good? The m in mRNA is for messenger. And the message is take the vaccine, because we’re all in this together.
1 hr 6 min
May 3, 2021
Michael Pollan said “Eat food, not too much, mostly plants.” A company called Kencko makes it easy to do just that in powder form, giving you a super tasty way to get your daily dose of fruits and veggies in smoothies that take like 30 seconds to make. Shake what your momma gave you.
Apr 26, 2021
Writing is a technology. Using a pen’s been around for longer than most of us have been alive. And yet, the pen is flat and pretty basic. That’s why we’re here to talk about the Parlo pen, a new twist on a very old idea. Measuring in at 10 inches uncapped and about half that in writing position, it’s a slim, lightweight pen that’s precisely focused on its purpose. What does it do? Disappoint you. [NOTE: This intro was written by an AI called Sudowrite, one of three writing tools we review on today’s show, along with Rocketbook and Freewrite.]
1 hr 20 min
Apr 19, 2021
Come fly with us, as we test out two travel products for travelers. Baboon to the Moon is a stylish yet rugged yet fun overnight bag to make a statement on the runway. Ostrichpillow is a pillow for your face, so you can get your beauty rest en route to your destination, even if your destination is more attention.
Apr 12, 2021
It’s snacktime, All Consumers. Time to fill your snackholes with morsels of regret, and talk about it for the content. Today we do pork rinds without pork, beef jerky without beef, and meal bars without the meal, in search of the perfect way to make ourselves whole, nutritionally and emotionally.
Apr 5, 2021
On this week’s episode, we bare ourselves and try “Gummies”, a direct-to-consumer microdose gummy that promises to unlock your mind’s potential. Does it work? Or does it just make you dumb?
Mar 22, 2021
Have you heard that blue light from your screens is kind of harmful? BLNQ is an eyeglasses brand that wants to solve this with handsome frames that cut the blue light out of your screen time. We had Miami photographer Devin Christopher on to try out BLNQ frames with us, talk about light, color, eyes and happiness.
1 hr 6 min
Mar 15, 2021
It’s a show where two friends, equally transfixed by the ads in their feeds, try a new product every week. Some are great, some are stupid, some are great and stupid. Join us on a journey through the first six months of bullshit we tried so you don’t have to.
1 hr 3 min
Mar 8, 2021
Sometimes, in order to be better, you have to pee better. Vessel is an in-home wellness tracker with an app and a thing that you pee on, like a pregnancy test, but instead of babies, it’s for B9 folates; to tell you what your body really needs. Which at the end of the day, it’s just love, man.
Mar 1, 2021
Do you ever want to feel something…different, maybe even better? Do you want to sleep nicer, or focus harder, heal stronger, find balance? That’s what the makers of Beam want for you. And they’ve made a series CBD powders, capsules and even a salve for your lips, we think.
1 hr 5 min
Feb 22, 2021
quip is an electric toothbrush designed to encourage good habits. I mean, it’s fine. No, it’s a good product. There’s floss and toothpaste and shit.
1 hr 4 min
Feb 15, 2021
Drink. Dot. Haus. It’s more than just an apéritif, with rich, complex flavors derived from fruits, herbs and botanicals. Haus is a lifestyle, and Haus will sell no apéritif before its time. This, my friends, is the time.
1 hr 15 min
Feb 8, 2021
It’s winter time, and that means there’s snow, and when there’s snow, it means you gotta throw. That’s where EGO comes in, with their Power+ electric snow blower. Take everything you think you know about snow blowing and throw it away, because this is a revolution…in throwing snow.
1 hr 4 min
Feb 1, 2021
The future of revelry is in our hands. So say the makers of a no-booze beverage suite called Kin Euphorics. Crafted from balancing adaptogens, replenishing nootropics, and other bullshit. Our friend Molly Young is our very special guest to help us drink this and feel better.
Jan 25, 2021
Did you know you can make tea out of mushrooms? That doesn’t mean you should, but you can. And today we’re trying a variety of adaptogenic mushroom lattes from our dear friends at Lifehouse Tonics. It’s tea time, mushroom heads.
Jan 18, 2021
You know, light is everything. Light is life, light is truth, good light can make a bad day better. And here’s a way to bring good light into your world. It’s from Gantri, a maker of 3D printed lights that looks as beautiful off as they do on. And also, Glow, a night light from Casper that’s way cooler than a mattress.
1 hr 2 min
Jan 11, 2021
How pure is your water? I mean, there’s no way to know really, but you can hydrate with a Larq water bottle and obliterate those cooties so that you can be a happier, cleaner human. Let’s get wet.
Jan 4, 2021
Does your body hurt? Do you long to be touched? Then today’s products might be for you. Because we tried out the Chirp Wheel+ by Chirp. It’s a wheel that you put your body on, to make it feel good. And Halo is head massager with the looks and brains of a dumb sexy robot. Let’s get it on.
1 hr 22 min
Dec 21, 2020
Hey, good lookin’. Let’s fry up an episode about cookware with today’s hot topic: Equal Parts. Equal Parts makes nontoxic ceramic pots and pans that are aesthetically pleasing, and easy to clean. Join us in the test kitchen.
Dec 14, 2020
Hey, get the shit out of your ears and listen up, because we’re going to talk about an ear cleaning system with a teeny tiny camera that connects to an app on your phone and it’s called Spade. Ear cleaning reinvented, reimagined. Let’s dig in.
Dec 7, 2020
Today’s product is unabashedly called BALLS. It’s a hair grooming product for one specific purpose—one specific region. Can you guess what region? I’ll give you a hint, it’s the BALLS. Groom them safely and effectively with BALLS.
Nov 30, 2020
Oats are the most powerful grain on the planet. And overnight oats? It’s game over, don’t even get me started. Mush is overnight oats that are creamy, flavorful and fun. So we’re gonna eat some and talk about it.
Nov 23, 2020
If you could put a couple drops of liquid under your tongue and make all your troubles go away, would you do it? Here’s a company called Feals that wants you to give yourself the gift of calm. We weren’t so sure it would work on us so we recorded this episode in three parts. Let’s take some drugs.
1 hr 27 min
Nov 16, 2020
Just breathe. Slow down, step away, get comfortable with a cushion designed just for meditating. It’s a meditation cushion called Walden. And today, we’re talking about how to practice meditation, with a very special guest and a very special cushion. On a very special day. Take a breath.
Nov 9, 2020
Have you ever wiped your ass with bamboo? No, I’m serious. It’s 100% tree-free toilet paper, and it’s called Reel with two e’s. We’re going to be talking about Reel toilet paper, and toilet behavior in general. It’s good for the planet, it’s good for your butt, and all your special places. Let’s get clean down there.
Nov 2, 2020
Get ready because shit’s about to get real. And when it does, you’re going to want to be prepared for 72 hours or less. That’s why today, we’re talking about Judy, an emergency preparedness kit that comes with everything you need if tomorrow goes bad.
Oct 26, 2020
We have dandruff. There I said it, and it feels good to get that off our chests, which may never be dusted with our flakes again…because for this episode, we tried a new haircare system called Jupiter. Let’s brush it off…together.
Oct 19, 2020
Today, we’re not too hot and we’re not too cold; we’re just right. Because we’re talking about the world’s first temperature-controlled mug. It’s called Ember. The perfect episode awaits.
Oct 12, 2020
We found out about a pillow. A new kind of pillow. A new shape of pillow. And that shape is cube-like. It’s a cube-like pillow, and it’s called Pillow Cube. Sleep on it with us, won’t you?
Oct 4, 2020
Today’s show, we’re going to be talking about Magic Spoon. It’s kids cereal…for adults. It’s sugar-free, it’s tech-forward, it’s very colorful, it’s engineered fun. Let’s recapture the energy of childhood, shall we?
Oct 4, 2020
On today’s show, we’re going to be talking about NUGGS from a company called Simulate. It’s a simulated chicken nugget experience and we’re gonna see how it measures up against…chicken nuggets.