A Rational Fear
A Rational Fear
Feb 10, 2023
What does Clive Palmer do now? — Osher Gunsberg, Floyd Alexander-Hunt, Dan Ilic, Lewis Hobba + Judy Hannan
Play • 28 min

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G’day Fearmongers —

Happy Superbowl weekend, we have juicy podcast served with a side of ranch dressing and celery sticks — BUT before we get to that, you should know:

Tickets are on sale now for A Rational Fear live in a city near you!

Adelaide Fringe —  March 4th
Brisbane World Science Festival — March 26th
Melbourne International Comedy Festival — APRIL 2nd

We’ve got great line-ups for each show. And we have a limited number of discounted tickets for podcast listeners for Adelaide and Melbourne: “PODCAST” is the code.

On the podcast this week we have some wonderful guests:

Osher Gunsberg
Floyd Alexander-Hunt
Lewis Hobba
Dan Ilic

+ we warm up for the NSW elections with the Independant Candidate for Wollondilliy and The Southern Highlands, Judy Hannan.

We talk about Clive Palmer’s failed mine bid.

How to save Australia Post.

New Zealand’s HUGE cocaine haul.

EXTRA FEAR only on the Patreon & Apple Subscription — we talk Alan Tudge's resignation.

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This podcast is supported in part by Australian ethical. Good morning or good evening, Lewis.

Hello. Yes, good, good. Whatever day off time time of day this finds you.

It's a flat circle. No one, no one really has a good handle on time. Time is irrelevant. Now, there was an article in the BBC saying that time is a construct, we actually time doesn't actually exist, which I have to

agree that in the BBC before that when you like, Oh, I thought God gave it to us.

Other time was brought down by Neptune. Neptune gave us time. Big news, Louis. You You know this news, by the way. Oh, yeah. But you are a new dad. This is so exciting. Congratulations.

Thank you. It's actually so rare that when you tell me that we have news that I actually am across a rare and precious fact. Yes. thrilled. I have a five week old daughter her name's olive. She's a really good baby, but pretty into her. And that's why I've been away for the law. I missed last week. I tried to join kinda, but it was a mess. It's also I genuinely have no idea what's happening. Like, whatever comes up today will be relatively new information.

Great. It'd be fresh years and we really, yeah, well, it means also, the Patreon is more important than ever, because we've got more mouths to feed, we gotta feed olive. I don't give Lewis any of the Patreon money but the point is, you know, in principle, chipping, chipping, like Nick or rock voiceover actor who was in last week's episode, he just I wanted to give him money. He said, No, I'm gonna give you money and become a patreon supporter. Thank you, Nick. David Bluestein. Comedian and game developer also signed up for Patreon this week. Thank you, Dave Lewis, we've got some live shows so you can spend less time with your new family around the country. Adelaide is happening in four weeks Andrew Hanson, Gabby Bolte, Alice, Fraser Lewis and myself. Then we've got April 2 at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Huge show. Gabby Alice Grace time Vidya Rajan. That's what I reckon Sammy Shah, and then Brisbane, coming up at the end of March with a huge show for World Science Festival. Mark Humphries. Mel bottle Mandy, darlin Lewis and myself. Also, Louis, we are talking with onstage live. Someone who is a Brisbane native Her name is Dr. Jesse Christianson sees the head of the NASA exoplanet library. And she works on the JW S T. She's probably one of the smartest people we've ever had on the show. So it's very excited. We have we've had some smart people on the show. You know, we've had that the Bondi hipsters. We've had Dr.

Cow. I don't even understand what her job is what from what you've just told me like, well, it's an exoplanet. I guess we'll have to wait and see.

We'll have to wait and see in Brisbane. So that's exciting. Anyway, join us in Brisbane at the end of March. It's going to be very exciting. I'm recording mine of irrational fear on Gadigal land in the urination. Sovereignty was never seated. When did a treaty Let's start the show.

A rational fear contains naughty words like bricks. Canberra, fed gum and section 40 of a rational view recommended listening by immature audiences.

Tonight family reunions breakout across the world as Twitter outage causes people to put down their phones and pay attention to their loved ones for one hour and sports bit paid $9,000 for the communications minister on election Eve paid for dinner Minister Roland said it wasn't lobbying. It was just the same dinner multi and former Prime Minister Tony Abbott joins a climate sceptic Think Tank A sentence that makes more sense in the phrase former Prime Minister Tony Abbott. It's the ninth of February 2023. And this is the only media outlet that is not sued by Ben Robert Smith. This is irrational fear.

Welcome to rational feet. I'm your host, former Green Senator Dan Ilic. And this is the podcast that takes the news and puts it into blender with some protein powder. Let's meet our fear mongers for tonight. She's put on hold the money and the stability of being a lawyer for something much more exciting. Yes, she's a comedian Floyd Alexander. Hi and welcome to irrational fear.

Thanks so much for having me back.

Look, my pleasure look why why shouldn't comedy be the backup job here? Shouldn't you be you know, all gung ho for a for a proper career in law, that's where the money is a short

I think it's that my parents were really it was it was like, when I said I was gonna do law, they were really disappointed in me. So I was like, I was very confused.

And his career is long serving, but his hip is brand new. It's broadcaster podcaster and Rose distributor. Asha, Gunzburg. Asha. You've got a new haircut. Are you planning on any more upgrades in the future? No, I'm

actually I might hit number. I've walked on hip number one and hit number five. There was yeah, it's been a long and winding journey but I'm finally here tonight. And I'm grateful that none of you got that guy Sebastian Australian Idol season one job but fine. That's it No, I'm not planning on any more upgrades.

I was listening out for the words battle and scars Asha I couldn't hear battle and scars together in a sentence so totally love

never get behind me at the airport. I will always, always be touched by security guy every time for the rest of my life.

It feels like you've been a contestant on like the grandad bachelor where instead of giving metal hips

pretty much I brought this great misconception, Louis as I never actually touched the roses. I just can't touch the

drug deal. I like it. The development of drug dealer kingpin never touches the gear. He's the only broadcaster at Triple J who gets called Daddy, it's Louis harbour

I did beforehand as well. So writing right on through

coming up later, we are getting warmed up for the New South Wales state elections we're gonna be chatting with independent candidate for a while and really shy and the Southern Highlands Judy Hannon will ask her is the gumnut Bakery overrated. But first heard this message from this week's sponsor?

Hi, Peter Dutton here, I'm calling on albeau to provide more information of the indigenous voice to Parliament, but not in the format of a 270 page report. That's too much information. And not in a format of a series of one on one consultations from constitutional experts and the Prime Minister himself. That information is to oral and as you know, I've heard of listening, which is why I refuse to hear members of my own party advocating for a yes position. You could try to make a pamphlet with pictures that move when you pull a little tab, but it'll go straight into the shredder. If a report, briefings, conventions, pamphlets, a decade of development, and even lobbying from my own party won't convince me Peter Dutton, maybe there's another reason that a former Queensland cop is against an indigenous voice to Parliament. I just can't put my finger on it. But if I did, I'd have to vocalise it, and then I'd have to sue myself for defamation. And maybe that's the only detail that's missing. elbow

arthroscopy. Yeah, that that sketch was sent off to legal I don't know if it'll make it onto the internet as a whole, but I think it would be safe for the podcast,

Lloyd legal

aid as a lawyer here. So as a comedian, I say very funny.

Dad as someone who the current live show I'm doing was based upon that history of being sued by people such as the one that was not in that sketch. They said, You need to read a disclaimer before you do your live show. I'm standing on stage like I'm saying grace before me or reading a disclaimer. But, Dan, I that is an amazing I love you.

Alright, this week's first fear in a big win for the environment. Tanya Plibersek has killed off Clive Palmer's war retired coal mine saying that the earth can't sustain a coal mine and Clive Palmer at the same time. It's a win, but also not really a win. Yeah, since 2000 7000. projects were referred to the government under the Environmental Protection biodiversity act. Of those 7013 were refused in 20 years. Presumably, there are 6987 projects that were greenlit, it was said that the real reason that Clive Palmer's mine was refused was because it was the site was about 10 kilometres from the Great Barrier Reef not because Clive Palmer campaigned against the Labour government in the last three elections over the last decade. No, not that not that reason at all. So there are also 117 new fossil fuel projects on the table by companies who are probably aren't as annoying to labour as Clive Palmer, the real test will be will Labour prevent those projects from going ahead to save the planet or just let them slide because they didn't spend $140 million against them in the last election? fear mongers if you were Clive Palmer this week, what would you be doing to kind of save your karma? Well,

I mean, first you take a breath or if you Clive, along, deep, shattering breath. And then I imagine he would go up to his little attic and get his big paws, grab a couple of little tweezers and start building his tiny little Titanic three that he hasn't started.

I mean, it does make sense this guy who started like a dinosaur park, I mean, he all he wanted to do was dig up old dinosaurs and burn them and put them in the sky. This is this is that was the completion of his dream.

It's a stunning turn of events. And I can only imagine that just packets of Tim Tams. Were just terrified at that moment that hit the news. Have you ever seen him do the Tim Tams? It's terrifying footage.

I'm sorry you haven't explained? What do you mean? Do the Tim Tams.

Floyd knows what I'm talking about. Go and enjoy. Your Google cookies will never be the same once you write Clive Palmer each packet of Tim Tams.

Right does the Tim turn

off his private jet and essentially it was amazing. I think it's like it's a it's a ballsy move. It's a ballsy move for a man that is, you know, prepared to put hundreds of millions of dollars on kind of like, I don't know, it's kind of Insell looking dudes standing at the side of the street holding big yellow signs for months, and to be shut down like that is pretty cool. Is it going to happen again? I'd like to hope so. Because you're going to have to back that up. You're gonna have to go well, you can't do it either. And neither neither can you. It's a monster move. I'd like to see it happen more and see some sort of, I don't know maybe Clive. Do you see the writing on the wall Clive to just get into some green energy they call it a battery factory there's money to be made buddy

hate that is true.

I feel like I can do it with other cases where it's like oh yeah, it's 2000 kilometres from Great Barrier Reef but that's still too close just anything it like in on the side of the world of Great Barrier Reef banking just use that as precedent

I just say that the same atmosphere like the same exact the same atmosphere get like the the ocean leashes the same carbon out of the same atmosphere as matter where the fuck on the planet.

A long game like obviously Clive with Titanic too, is that his big focus and the mining is really just a side operation. I've never put these things together. But is there a chance that he's mining is really a long game for Titanic too, because he thinks the only way I can make sure this ship doesn't sink. Icebergs left anyway.

I say I see what you're going to. Like when the West Antarctic Ice Sheet finally collapses. maiden voyage, Jack and Rose. We're doing it again. But this time, it's

we have to complete a series of tasks to weed roses affection. And if he does, yeah, guess who hands out the raw

rational fear when the day comes that most surely will when Titanic to sales into New York, you'll be able to say that you are here.

This week. Second fear Australia Post is set to declare its first loss since 2015. Yes, profit is down for the first six months by 88%. Australia Post says that let us continue to decline at an unstoppable rate. And the company said quote, they're at a crossroads and the headwinds they are facing have never been stronger. And because they were so confused by the crossroads and the headwinds, they've just left a card and returned back to the Depo. And I also say by the end of the decade, the average Australian household receives less than one letter a week fair Mungus How can we save Australia Post

so they said by the by 2030 Australian households received one letter a week that's impressive given Australia's going to be underwater by that is actually an achievement. first idea is that they sell other people's mail, because like I don't want to open my own mail. I want to open other people's mail. And

this is the new format. Asha is trying to develop a new a new TV format. Get rid of the news format. No one wants news, comedy Asha, we've tried here, what people want is what's inside this strangers letter.

Reality show

they could also just start renting out post offices. You know, Sydney rent is so high just start like renting out the offices, you

can honestly rent out the postbox for like 500 a week at the moment, literally. What about if we start using the little motorbikes for like Uber as well? If you go, Hey, I really just need to go down the street. And they're like, Oh, great. That's where I'm going anyway. And then you hop on the back. They deliver a few letters on the way it's like Uber pool,

why not? They have the infrastructure. They have the pipeline. They have the staff, they know how to give a smack out to an angry Labrador. They know what they're doing. Also, we can easily stop the flow of WR X's coming in and out of Western Sydney all the way into the eastern suburbs. I laid on a Friday night if you just had a couple of solid Koreas there, you've already got the drops on every street corner. It's like It's like Idris Elba was here. Very much. Like just kind of running on the wire. It's beautiful. I

really liked you of getting to my house and seeing a bunch of cards saying we couldn't deliver your 600 grammes of cocaine. It's back at the Depo come down to the post office and pick it up.

Suze? Oh, rational fear and of letter delivery could be closer than we think

the future is at some stage there will be no mail when that is it's hard to predict. This week's third there the Kiwis have intercepted our cocaine Yes, the New Zealand Navy intercepted three tonnes of cocaine floating out in the Pacific destined for Australia. The whole of anyone Bales is worth $500 million. I'm lucky for some of them. They had four leaf clovers on them. Some of them aren't with the Batman symbol. There is so much Sasson snark. From the New Zealand police. I think they said the word blow three times in their press conference, which was very good. They also said that oh well. This is a 30 year supply for New Zealand but only a one year supply for Australia. Oh burn burn. Kiwis know how to party flow. These are your country people do Do they know how to party or are they just like are they pop in everybody else's party here? Um,

I think they know how to party. I mean, they should do like Tom Hanks or something should try and like take credit for it and then New Zealand will be like it it is we do love it is

it's just the hobbits sort of white ratio is quite small so they only need that gets them on the whole journey.

Whoever's gear it was, they are they someone has done marketing at TAFE. Like St. Patrick's Day is less than six weeks away. They've got four leaf clovers on there, they are ready to party like you'll get maximum. But

I think the true heroes every time there's a significant cocaine bust are people who leave comments on news articles like rip, I, there's a part of it. It's like good. Good for you like that is because you're immediately on a watch list. But you know, it's worth it for the Viet.

If you remember the Patreon you're about to hit extra fear. That's one more story than usual. If not sign up to hear the story. We're going to be talking about Alan Tudge. If you're not a member of the Patreon, you're going to hear an ad. And when we come back, we're going to be talking with Judy Hannon, the independent candidate for Wollondilly Shire and southern highlands. Who's got some things to say about chlamydia free koalas, you know irrational for your listeners just popping in here to say yes, this is the the ad you've been promised. It's an ad for our sponsor, Australian ethical, who jumped on board to sponsor the next 10 weeks of the irrational fear podcasts, the strange, ethical, awesome, folks, they basically manage money ethically. So if you've got a whole stack of money, you need to do something with but you don't want to put it into things like weapons, human trafficking, fossil fuels, and you police academy film, they won't invest in the host. So invest in good things, things that are sustainable, and promote businesses that do incredible things in the environment, around health around equity. That's the kind of people you want looking after you money that is Australian, ethical, and they are the sponsor of irrational fear. We thank you Australian ethical hope to hope to

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Over the last 17 years, she served the woman really shy as a counsellor and mare. She's also the chair of the Australian optometry board and now she's hoping voters will have enough 2020 vision to put her in the running for a state seat at the New South Wales election. We're gonna flip open the Snellen chart and get her to read from the bottom layer. Please welcome to irrational fear, Judy Hannon. Welcome, Judy. Hi. Hi, everyone.

Yeah, welcome. Welcome to the show. Did I say that right? Is it a Snellen? Chart? Is that what is that what people call it?

Whatever. Six weeks or six? Five.

That's it. That's it. Optometry. Now, Judy, it's really exciting to have you on the show. We're kind of getting into the into the New South Wales election mode, you're running as an independent, what do you think you can do as an independent that you can't do in a big party.

So in a big party, out here, they do nothing. So anything I do will be better and an improvement. There's lots to be done out here. And I can certainly act with integrity, which is probably lacking in the parties. I don't have to worry about the parties. I can simply just work for our community out here. And certainly for our koalas as well. There's a

there's an amazing book out at the moment, which I'm reading and rereading. It's by Rick Rubin, who produced it ran on chilli peppers in Adele and all kinds of things. He talks about people who come to a project without knowing all the rules sometimes get far further and get far more creative because they're not beholden to, you know what's coming before them. As Judy mentioned, not having to work with the major parties like being free of the solemnity that surrounds those pirate rooms. Oh, you can't say that. Because that's such and such as like, being able to speak your mind and these halls of power do you? Do you feel that that would be able to cut through even though those parties hold so much power?

I reckon it will. I'm a bit of a burden. They can challenge the things like ride my, my tractors see if they can tractor ride faster than me all sorts of. So yes, I don't obey the rules politely. And yeah, get a lot of things done out here. It's it's a really interesting area, and we supply all your food. So it's important that I get the job done. Food

security is massive. That's one of the big unspoken things around climate change. And your your Shire has been on fire and underwater quite a lot in the last couple of years. What kinds of things do you want to be able to do to to kind of help the people that live there in the face of these increasingly volatile situations?

So you would have seen the pictures of black roofs with no trees, no backyards, simply big houses on little blocks of land that it just rolled out and they're just creating heat island To fix, and there's no infrastructure of any description at all. So there's a lot to be done out here. We've got the word gamba dam wall. And you would note that the government say they're going to raise the dam wall, it won't put one extra drop of drinking water into Sydney. But what it will do is destroying a whole lot of cultural indeed, indigenous artworks, and some really scarce birds.

It's interesting, you kind of bring up a bunch of environmental stuff because the the New South Wales liberals are really good at painting themselves as quite progressive on net zero targets and carbon emissions and the environment. Is that a scam? Or is or is that? Or do they have some value in that in that regard?

Is there an election coming?

We all saw the police randomly decide to do something last week.

Climate change, you know, because there's an election coming, it's becoming popular, unfortunately, their actions out here and not proving that you know that they're doing anything substantial. And just letting developers run rampant across our whole area that supplies the food for Sydney, they might speak the speak but there's no action in there at all.

One of the extraordinary things that I saw driving down Picton road about a month ago was just the incredible amount of development that is happening. It's like huge swathes of land which probably would have been farmland or or something. But like completely levelled out, flattened. And then the next minute you are driving past all those black rooms. And it feels like those houses that you drive past are so big for the locks they're on. They're so close together, that it's not it's not a pleasant place to live. And it seems that there's there's not real much thought other than maximum house for block out as an independent. And can you kind of stop this this huge overdevelopment?

Look, we need to look at the planning laws. I don't think anybody can agree that planning laws in New South Wales are good. We need to have enough people in there to change the way it's done. All the people that are planners actually say that the planning is bad. But none of them can break away from the actual, you know, their catalogue of Ticketek there. But we need to revisit that and do planning in a whole different way in a sustainable way. Where people have backyards, they can have trees, where aged care is next to preschools, all those things that we know will bring good community values. So there's so much that can be done. And I'd like to get enough people in there that we can change the planning laws

your electorate as part of one of the unfortunately and tragically horrifically lost kind of habitats of the koala. What can you do to protect this thing that we as Australians take for granted as a national identity yet? Clearly, like? I think I was just reading the other day that entire swathes of the southwest of New South Wales. No, quality's gone. All gone. All gone. Yeah,

it's so weird. Like I've never ever seen a koala in the natural habitat around Sydney, and I've lived here for 40 years.

So the koalas in our area are the only chlamydia free koalas in New South Wales. The area they live in is literally having 30,000 houses planted upon it. And the koalas unfortunately, can't read a map because they've been given corridors to go along. I thought they might give them all little apps on a phone. I can turn right here, turn left here. And the problem is if they forced them across onto the stand stone area that's beyond that, they will literally starve. And they will be much more susceptible to disease. So it's really quite sad. And I'd love to see if I got elected to Parliament in the 25th of March. I'd actually love to say a committee formed for flora and fauna of New South Wales.

Oh, great. Oh, this is really interesting, Judy, and I don't get me wrong. I'm like, I am a very passionate person when it comes to protecting the environment. And people want to live somewhere. What is the solution here? What's the solution? There's 30,000 houses what this list says 100,000 people, where do they live?

So there is other land and there's a lot of infill that can be done. Unfortunately, what's happening is we're having developers buy what you would have seen a couple of weeks ago, we had money launderers by 390 hectares, I believe in corridor, but literally, the developers are buying up our farmland, and they are just wiping it out. They're not cutting down selective trees or anything like that. They're Moon scaping, the whole area. So there is no ability for any flora or fauna to live with these people. And yes, we've got to have houses but we've got to have houses that are affordable to live in, as well as affordable to buy. So the houses that day So all the land that he saw, there is no public transport. There isn't even a plan for water or sewer there. Mind you, I did see that they are talking about selling off Sydney Water. We're going to put people there that can't get to work. Unless they travel for hours on the roads that are already clogged up. And you shouldn't you shouldn't stop me on it. But like Alan Jones had a shot at me he I mean, he had a shot about the fact I was stopping his mates, you know, do development, the actual one that you saw Dan, probably. And I said, send a message back. Fine, come and meet me there but come by public transport, because there isn't any. And yet we're putting 1000s of people there. Yeah. And like the the Netherlands do it so much better. Overseas, they have bikes to railway stations and all sorts of magical things. And here we just crowding as many black rooms and make as much money as we can for developers.

I can't believe due to that you are suggesting that selective high density areas linked together by bicycle paths and high speed rail. What do you want this country to be?

I thought you were gonna say I can't believe you suggested Elton John's take public transport.

Sometimes he lets people share his helicopter with it.

But you know, it's just terrible. And the trouble is, once I work the koalas out, we can't fix it later. They'll be gone,

Judy. Good luck next month, Sam we'll be we'll be seeing how you travel. And we are at the end of the show. So thanks to all of our guests. Floyd Alexander hunt, Asha Gunzburg God Hanim Louis harbour whatever. You guys got to plug this out with you, Judy. What would you like to plug?

Ah, certainly the cake shop you talked about down in barrel. It is the best. They have a queue that goes down the street for a mile waiting for cakes, especially on a Saturday.

That's the gum that bakery in Main Street about Yeah. i Yeah, I'm a big fan of the the industrial state version in Mittagong. Where they where they bake all the cakes because it's much shorter queues. Yep, that's my that's my hot tip. Louis, what do you wanna plug

down? We have some live shows in March and April. The dates of which aren't relevant. What does matter? That you buy tickets in a 10

March for in Adelaide, April 2 in Melbourne, march 26 in Brisbane, come along, Floyd Alexander hunt, would you like to

play okay most important thing I got a plug as next weekend I'm getting married. Just follow me on Instagram and like my photo that will be amazing.

I should Gunzburg What are you plugging?

I'd like to plug Dan Ilic live on stage with me Friday the 10th of February at Factory Theatre in America till 7pm for NT n n n and n real stories fake news. I've always wanted to do a fake news show because I saw Dan do on once. No one No network gave me one so I made one up and it's frickin fun. It's super amazing. Early doors seven o'clock. Come along also Melbourne, Melbourne International Comedy Festival from 30 to march.

Yes and a big thank you to all of our supporters on Patreon Also, thanks to roadmaps, Australian ethical. Big thanks to Jacob brown on the Tepanyaki timeline for all of his amazing work and we will see you next time. See you then. Bye

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

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