4. Falling Asleep to Self for the Enneagram Type 9
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The content from The Peacemaker’s Podcast should not be taken as medical advice.  The content here is for informational purposes only, and because each person is so unique, please consult your healthcare professional for any medical or mental health questions.  If you are currently facing mental health or medical emergency, call 911 immediately.  

The Peacemaker’s Podcast EP004 Shownotes

Recorded on April 9, 2020, one month into the COVID-19 quarantine for Lindsey’s family.  Check out the link below to see her video giving an update on her family and the podcast since the quarantine started.  In today’s episode, Lindsey talks about type nine’s tendency to “fall asleep to themselves”. The Wisdom of the Enneagram says we type nines are “more devoted to any other number to the quest for internal and external peace” (Riso and Hudson).

Have you been noticing yourself pulling away from others during this quarantine time?  What about in general during other times of stress? When nines encounter stress we can go inward and get quiet, pull away from others, and require more alone time than normal.  We may notice ourselves experiencing more feelings of anger or anxiety. As a type nine, we have developed many patterns over our life as a way of protecting ourselves from stress or harm, so it would be perfectly normal if our “nine patterns” are rearing their heads during this COVID 19 crisis.  

The type nine is often referred to as being slothlike - and you may not relate to this because you feel very active outwardly.  But you may be falling asleep inwardly to your desires and feelings.  

Lindsey shared a story about how she used to stare out the window in the car when she was younger and retreat into her inner world (5:15).  As a nine, because we can be out of touch with ourselves, we may not have a very strong opinion about what we want. It may take some digging on our parts to figure out our opinions.  

One of the members of the The Peacemaker's Community FB Group, “Jonathan” shares about himself and his way of processing the world as a nine. (7:45)  Jonathan talks about the Enneagram and how it has been a revelation for him to realize how he’s fallen asleep to himself and his needs.  He talks about being the youngest child in his family and that he often didn’t want to do or say the wrong thing. He started playing the role of the “good child” from a young age.  He said that even now as an adult, he easily falls into the role of keeping peace with others and he “edits” himself in conversations with others (unknowingly) as a means to keep his opinions to himself and maintain a connection with others. (10:40)

The Enneagram speaks to our motivations, so it doesn’t matter as much what your interests are or your life experiences are or if you are an extrovert or introvert.  People from all walks of life and backgrounds can come to be “peacemakers” and Enneagram research tells us that this happens as a result of both our genetics and environment (nature and nurture).  

The closing challenge for the listener:

  • Give yourself time!  This process of knowing ourselves, learning more about our Enneagram numbers and accessing our emotions/feelings and opinions is a journey!  Give yourself a lot of grace in this process and recognize that it’s going to be a lifelong journey. The goal isn’t to undo all of our patterns, but to recognize them and put yourself in a position to choose new directions and reactions in our lives.  
  • If you love an Enneagram Type 9, ask them questions, give them time to respond, and ask follow-up questions!  We don’t always know right away what we want or need, so it might take some time!

Books and Links Mentioned

The Wisdom of the Enneagram - Don Riso and Russ Hudson

Follow Lindsey Haeger on Instagram @lindseyhaeger.co


COVID-19 Video Message from Lindsey

Exclusive Facebook Group "The Peacemaker's Community

**Here are two online assessments Lindsey recommends, but always, always continue your research after they give you a “type”.  It’s best to look further into your top three by reading books, listening to podcast episodes for those numbers, and even joining online communities for those types so you can get a better idea of what the types “look like” and how patterns manifest in different people.  Don’t rush the process of nailing down your number :)

Free Enneagram Assessment - https://www.9types.com/newtest/index.php

Paid Enneagram Assessment - The Enneagram Institute - https://tests.enneagraminstitute.com/

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