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Relationship Alive!
Relationship Alive!
Neil Sattin
244: A Practical Approach for Big Changes
When you want to shift something in your life, sometimes the scale of the change can seem daunting. So how do you get from point A to point B (or...point Z) in a way that's actually doable - and sustainable? It can be tempting to take drastic actions to make big changes - but you might sabotage your changes by falling into your old habits. Today we'll talk about how you can create positive changes in your relationship, or something else in your life, in a way that's practical, and relatively easy - no matter how big the change. As always, I’m looking forward to your thoughts on this episode and what revelations and questions it creates for you. Please join us in the Relationship Alive Community on Facebook to chat about it! Sponsors: Find a quality therapist, online, to support you and work on the places where you’re stuck. For 10% off your first month, visit Betterhelp.com/ALIVE to fill out the quick questionnaire and get paired with a therapist who’s right for you. Resources: Check out my Secrets of Relationship Communication COURSE for a masterclass in how to improve the communication and connection in your relationship. I want to know you better! Take the quick, anonymous, Relationship Alive survey FREE Guide to Neil’s Top 3 Relationship Communication Secrets Guide to Understanding Your Needs (and Your Partner’s Needs) in Relationship (ALSO FREE) Support the podcast (or text “SUPPORT” to 33444) Amazing intro and outro music provided courtesy of The Railsplitters Transcript: Neil Sattin: Hello and welcome to another episode of Relationship Alive. This is your host, Neil Sattin. Today's topic is going to be how we can create big changes in our lives, but in ways that are sustainable. Because if you do something big to change your life but then you just fall back into old patterns, well, you're going to get the same results you've always gotten. Do the same thing, get the same results. So how can you create a big change in a way that you're going to be able to keep going, that you're going to be able to follow through on, so that it doesn't become just some other big resolution or a promise that you make to yourself that you can't keep? That is what we are going to talk about in today's episode, and I'm going to use an example from my personal life that I've experienced over the past few months so that you can get a sense of what I'm talking about. Neil Sattin: First, I just want to say thank you for being here with me. This wouldn't be a show without you being here with me to talk about relationship issues, and all these different facets of how to show up more fully in our lives, in our relationship with ourselves and in our relationship with the people who are most important to us. So thank you for being here with me. Neil Sattin: Okay, I think that's it. Let's get on with the show, shall we? So when it comes to making big changes in your life, a lot of people talk about the need to take massive action. If you want radically different results, you have to do things radically differently. And on some level, that's true. And often, taking massive action can sometimes be necessary, because sometimes the changes that you want to make, if you want to, for instance, leave a relationship, those kinds of decisions and choices and actions can feel huge, and you have to do this big thing in order to create some momentum in a new direction. But it can be common for people to take a huge action, to feel all this energy and momentum, maybe you've even gone to some personal development seminar and you come back all pumped for the big things that are going to change in your life, and then day after day, week after week, you find that it's hard to maintain the big change. Neil Sattin: And this sometimes happens. I mentioned the ending of a relationship as an example. It's a good example because sometimes, I'm sure if you haven't experienced this, you've known people who have experienced it, where they take a big action, they decide they're going to leave their relationship, they even announce it to their partner, and then it never quite happens. Or it does happen, but then somehow they end up back together again, and back in the same old patterns that they were always in, and the same old misery, and the same old reasons for not being together in the first place. So it's not all doom and gloom, fortunately, but there has to be something else to back up whatever big changes you are trying to make in your life. Neil Sattin: And those could be big changes like ending a relationship, or it could be big changes like making your relationship better, because maybe you simply want to improve the way things are in your relationship. And this is another thing where it can be like, "Alright, we're going to have a date night every week. We're going to make sure that we take three vacations. We're going to show up every day in ways that are loving and caring." And on and on. "We're going to explore new realms of sexual ecstasy together." But then in the end comes... What is it? After the something, the laundry. Like, there's the day-to-day quality of life and how challenging it can be to sustain anything like that, even if you have the best intentions and the best desires and the most brilliant vision for how you want a thing to be. Neil Sattin: Because the big things are inherently not sustainable, they take lots of energy, they take lots of time, they can take lots of thought and planning. Even though initially they're somewhat abrupt, if you want to keep those things going, then it requires a lot from you, and that's why it's not sustainable. And then you have this other problem, which is... Interested in reading the transcript for the rest of this episode? Click here to download the full transcript of this episode!
43 min
Unapologetically Sensitive
Unapologetically Sensitive
Patricia Young
101 Everything Is Love; I Love Myself with Sarah Buino, LCSW
TITLE Everything is Love; I Love Myself GUEST Sarah Buino, LCSW EPISODE OVERVIEW In a culture that values and rewards productivity, it can be challenging for the Highly Sensitive Person, who thrives at being vs. doing. Sarah talks about coming to fully love herself. We talk about trauma training, boundaries, developmental trauma. We talk about the gifts and challenges of living during COVID. Sarah talks about her Kundalini Awakening, and we talk about the spiritual bypass. GUEST Sarah Buino, LCSW, CADC, RDDP, CDWF is a therapist, teacher, speaker, and podcaster. She is a NARM Therapist and Certified Daring Way Facilitator, teaches at Loyola University, and hosts two podcasts: Conversations with a Wounded Healer and Transforming Trauma. She owns a group psychotherapy practice in Chicago. PODCAST HOST Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and Coach. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller. Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion. She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other HSPs know that they aren’t alone, and that being an HSP has amazing gifts, and some challenges. Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for HSPs that focus on understanding what it means to be an HSP, self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors us. LINKS Sarah’s Links Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/HeadHeartTherapy Instagram--https://www.instagram.com/headhearttherapy Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/WoundedHealr Twitter--https://twitter.com/HeadHeart_Chi Twitter--https://twitter.com/WoundedHealr LinkedIn--https://www.linkedin.com/in/sarahbuino/ Website-- www.headhearttherapy.com James Masterson Roru/Woru— https://www.contemporarypsychotherapy.org/volume-4-issue-2-winter-2012/living-between-rewarding-and-withdrawing-paradigms-of-experience/ The Nap Ministry-- https://thenapministry.wordpress.com/ Living between rewarding and withdrawing paradigms-- https://www.contemporarypsychotherapy.org/volume-4-issue-2-winter-2012/living-between-rewarding-and-withdrawing-paradigms-of-experience/ NARM—Neuro-Affective Relational Model https://narmtraining.com/what-is-narm/ Sarah Buino Episode 50: Boundaries—I want to be the one to stop it here-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/episode-50/ Episode 100—Sarah Buino interviews Patricia Young-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/episode-100-sarah-buino-interviews-patricia-young/ Patricia’s Links HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ Unapologetically Sensitive Merchandise-- https://patriciayounglcsw.com/product-category/merchandise/ Online HSP Course Materials (no group included) https://patriciayounglcsw.com/product-category/hsp-classes/ Podcast Survey-- https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe-fAYIyFgVb0VHlDorfm8ZdXClCcYDlv0cSP2RXZSZY16SIQ/viewform Receive the top 10 most downloaded episodes of the podcast-- https://www.subscribepage.com/e6z6e6 Sign up for the Newsletter-- https://www.subscribepage.com/y0l7d4 To write a review in itunes: * click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 * select “listen on Apple Podcasts” * chose “open in itunes” * choose “ratings and reviews” * click to rate the number of starts * click “write a review” Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Closed/Private Facebook group for therapists and healers-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/208565440423641/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok-- https://www.tiktok.com/@hsppodcast e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Shelly Aaron Productions—shellyaaronproductions@gmail.com Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
58 min
Being Well with Dr. Rick Hanson
Being Well with Dr. Rick Hanson
Rick Hanson, Ph.D., Forrest Hanson, Dr. Rick Hanson
How to Cope During a Pandemic with Dr. Bruce Perry
On this timely episode, Dr. Bruce Perry joins the podcast to explore how we can limit the long-term impact of stressful events, and heal from past traumatic experiences. About Our Guest: Dr. Bruce Perry is one of the world’s leading experts on childhood trauma, and his clinical research and practice focuses on examining the long-term effects of trauma in children, adolescents, and adults. He is the Senior Fellow of The ChildTrauma Academy, and the author, with Maia Szalavitz, of _The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog._ Key Topics: 1:15: Pandemic fatigue. 4:45: Experiencing acute stressors alongside chronic stress. 7:20: Practices to help yourself de-stress. 11:30: The impact of stress on our ability to regulate ourselves. 13:30: How to limit the long-term impact of stressful events. 18:40: How we can explore traumatic material without re-traumatizing ourselves. 23:30: Avoiding helplessness, and experiencing control and agency. 25:30: Dissociation as a coping response. 31:00: Disruptions of attunement. 36:00: Caregiver fatigue, and caring for ourselves. 41:30: The pandemic’s impact on people who have been previously traumatized. 44:00: A wish for the future. 46:00: Recap _Sponsors:_ Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/BEINGWELL and get a free trial of their Premium Membership. Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: * Follow us on Instagram * Follow Rick on Facebook * Follow Forrest on Facebook * Subscribe on iTunes
52 min
The Couples Therapist Couch
The Couples Therapist Couch
Shane Birkel
148: Start Using EFT in Your Practice with Debi Scimeca-Diaz
I recently attended the Emotionally Focused Therapy Externship which was taught by Debi Scimeca-Diaz. She was an amazing trainer and I learned a ton about the model. In this episode, she comes on the podcast and talks about how to use EFT in your practice and why EFT is such a great way of working with couples. Debi Scimeca-Diaz, LMFT is one of a small group of trainers in the world for Emotionally Focused Therapy. Dr. Sue Johnson, director and founder of International Center for Excellence in EFT (www.iceeft.com), has put her heart and soul into creating, researching and spreading EFT worldwide. Find more about Debi at couplestherapynj.com The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes. This episode is sponsored by Clearly Clinical Continuing Ed. Clearly Clinical is the nation's premier podcast Continuing Ed provider, and features industry experts from across the world. Clearly Clinical is an approved CE provider with the APA, ASWB, NBCC, NAADAC, CCAPP, and CAMFT, and is women-owned, founded by Elizabeth Irias, LMFT. Clearly Clinical supports minority and women presenters, and donates to Feeding America. And the best part? Clearly Clinical is literally the most affordable continuing ed provider in the country, bringing you unlimited CE courses for just $60 a year. As a promo for my listeners, you can use the code COUCH to get an additional 10% off. They have a number of free podcast CE courses, too, including a CE interview with Dr. Julie Gottman. Check those out at their website, ClearlyClinical.com. Click here for more information on the Couples Therapist Inner Circle. Get your free course called Working with Couples 101 Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group
43 min
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